387-75 VICTORY OVER ST. CHUX IN HISTORICAL BOUT!

By Muckety Muck, ARRG Bout Co-Announcer   -  Photos by Bob Dunnell

(ST. LOUIS, MO) Although two Missourian leagues are separated by mere miles in proximity, their respective “A” squads had never faced each other before until this past weekend.

Propelled by power surges and stubborn blocking, Arch Rival (#8 WFTDA North Central/#24 DNN) grinded out a 387-75 victory over St. Chux Derby Chix in WFTDA-sanctioned action Sunday at the Skatium in South St. Louis.

The closed bout marked the inaugural meeting of the pair of leagues’ primary travel squads since St. Chux, located in adjacent St. Charles County, became a full-time WFTDA member last September.

“We’re definitely friends with SCDC,” said Arch Rival blocker Chewblocka afterwards. “We didn’t know what to expect, but this was a friendly game for both to get better with.”

That’s not to say that there weren’t objectives for the side-by-side sistren. Arch Rival looks to make a big push in WFTDA’s Division 1 hierarchy in 2013 while SCDC (NC #31) would love to shock Division 3 after upsetting Demolition City (NC #21) two weekends ago.

“The goal for us is to always be competitive nationally,” said Arch Rival blocker Shimmy Hoffa. “We would love to go to playoffs and, hopefully, nationals. Really, it’s about playing the best derby that we can.”

That best was shown from the onset as Arch Rival sprinted to a triple-digit lead while holding SC/DC to a goose egg. A bout-opening, 25-point power jam from Mighty Mighty Boston set the tone.

Following six from Black Market Baby on the next rotation, South City Shiner collected a 23-pointer at 23:38 that extended Arch Rival’s lead to 54-0.

The rally continued with an ARRG baker’s dozen off two jams to make the margin 67-0, and then Shiner followed with a 24-0 jam at 19:00 that widened the gap to 91-0. Arch Rival inevitably concluded the derby dash after 14 points were tallied by Baby at 15:00 that pushed the lead to 112-0.

St. Chux jammer Flash busted the shutout with three on the next rotation, but Arch Rival’s Brickyard, a league sophomore making her A-squad debut, countered with a 25-point power jam with 11:30 left in the period that extended her squad’s lead to 137-3.

“I think this was the most nervous I’ve been in a bout since my first time playing,” said the travel team newcomer. “Everyone was really nice and helped me power through without being too nervous. It’s great playing with some girls who really know derby.”

St. Chux showed some moxie in the period’s final ten and went on an 18-0 run that whittled St. Louis’ margin to 143-21 with 6:40 left. Arch Rival possessed a 191-34 lead at intermission with a period-ending 24-pointer from Baby.

Arch Rival started the second period with a 22-0 rally off three jams, extending the lead to 213-34 four minutes deep. A 5-4 jam for Brickyard followed that widened the margin to 180 points, 218-38 with 24:55 left.

St. Louis then proceeded to put the hammer down with a 97-0 rally that stretched over eleven minutes of clock. While the starting quartet of ARRG jammers continued to post points, the blocking schema – paced by DNN 2012 Readers’ Poll finalist May Require Stitches, Chewblocka, Hoffa, Grave Danger, Science Friction, Smarty McFly, Rhino-Might, The Educator and a host of others – kept St. Chux stuck.

The multi-faceted attack helped Arch Rival sport a 315-38 lead with 13:30 remaining.

SCDC’s G.I. Jamie and Flash notched double-digit jams down the stretch to provide some spark, but ARRG’s late-bout 50-0 rally widened the ending differential. Arch Rival outscored SCDC 196-41 in the second period to collect the 312-point season-opening victory, their largest win to date.

“We knew it was really important for us to get a really strong point differential to make sure that we’re solidifying our spot in Division 1,” said Hoffa.

Brickyard’s 98 unofficial points paced Arch Rival, followed by Boston’s  97. St. Louis (1-0) makes a Nebraskan trip on March 30 to face South Central #8 Omaha (1-1) in a closed afternoon bout followed by an evening tilt against SC #5 No Coast (2-0) in Lincoln. No Coast bested Omaha 269-116 on Saturday.

Arch Rival’s goal for the end of the month is to show steady progression that could potentially keep the team in the thick of the D-1 rankings.

“That’s a conservative goal and we’ll just leave it at that,” said Chewblocka. “But my personal goal is to just crush everyone (laughs).That may be an ambitious goal.”

Flash paced St. Chux scoring with 42 points. Although the loss might have been bitter for the squad’s faithful following, the Pack in Black (1-1) gained invaluable experience from the inaugural meeting.

“I actually like mismatched bouts like this,” said SCDC bench coach Sweet Tooth afterwards. “For (ARRG), it’s kind of like a homecoming game where they get to tune up and play with some strategy during a blowout and we get exposure to a high-level team that has a very fast reaction time. They’re bigger and stronger than most teams we come across. This was a mutual benefit.”

They’ll put the knowledge attained to the test as they host NC #20 Old Capitol City (1-3) on March 30.

“I saw (OCC) earlier this year and I like the position we’re in,” the skipper said. “If we work on some things and we get some people to step up, I definitely like our outlook in a couple of weeks.”

UNOFFICIAL SCORING

ARCH RIVAL ALL STARS (387): Brickyard 98, Mighty Mighty Boston 97, South City Shiner 82, Black Market Baby 70, May Require Stitches 19

ST. CHUX DERBY CHIX PACK IN BLACK (75): Flash 42, G.I. Jamie 20, Vixen Ta Getcha 13

COMING UP NEXT MONDAY IN THE ARRG NEWSCENTER: As the ARRG All-Stars launches its 2013 campaign, a new complexion of the WFTDA rankings looms on the horizon. Competing leagues will be ranked internationally via a newly-implemented “rankings calculator.” What does it mean for them (Arch Rival), for you (the ARRG lovin’ fan) and Muckety Muck (the mathematically-challenged)? He’ll check in with an installment of “Muck It Up” that examines the newfound methodology.

Muckety Muck and Magilla Guerilla are bout co-announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news/information.

M-80s POWER THEIR WAY TO VICTORY IN THIRD PLACE BOUT

by Muckety Muck, ARRG Bout Co-Announcer – Photos by Bob Dunnell

(BALLWIN, MO) Regardless of the numbers posted on the scoreboard during the Arch Rival Roller Girls 2013 Local Championships, the 1,000 in attendance in Midwest Sport Hockey Saturday night will admit that this was arguably one of the most exciting finales in League history.

In the Championship bout, the Smashinistas defeated the Stunt Devils 179-177 to win their first-ever League title. Even though the original final score of the contest gave the Stunt Devils a 180-179 win, an adjustment to scoring was made post-bout and rendered official Sunday by the ARRG Board of Directors, resulting in the two-point victory for the Smashies.

In the League’s third-place bout, the M-80s capitalized on a first-period sprint and glided to a 160-117 win over Rebel Skate Alliance.

Both bouts provided plenty of excitement and intrigue…and it was worth every penny spent.

CHAMPIONSHIP BOUT: SMASHINISTAS 179  STUNT DEVILS 177

This bout had historical implications written all over it prior to the first whistle. For starters, one of the two competing squads would emerge as the newly-crowned local champions of ARRG.

Specifically for the Smashinistas, it was their first title bout appearance since 2010 and they had never hoisted hardware before.

The Stunt Devils had been in the League’s title bout for six straight seasons. The last time they won the trophy was in 2010…after defeating the Smashinistas.

Adding to the mystique of championship night, key cogs of both team’s blocking schemas were out with injury. The Smashinistas’ Eli Wallop and the Stunt Devils’ Deathica Steele were relegated to the sidelines.

Little did anyone know at the time that derby drama would unfold as the bout progressed…and afterwards.

The Stunts sprinted out to a 9-0 lead after Mighty Mighty Boston’s bout-opening jam.

The Smashinistas’ Brickyard posted four in retaliation on the next jam, whittling the Stunts’ lead to 9-4.

Following a 0-0 push on the next jam, Boston tacked on a trey to extend the margin to 12-4 with 25:40 left in the period.

A 2-2 jam from the Smashies’ The Educator and the Stunts’ South City Shiner pushed the score to 14-6. Stunts’ rookie jammer Killer Painguin collected four at 23:15 to extend the purple rollers’ lead to 18-6.

The Smashies netted eleven points on the next two jams to pull within a point. The Educator’s seven was followed by Brickyard’s four to whittle the Stunts’ lead to a sole digit, an 18-17 lead with 20:35 left in the period.

Following a scoreless rotation, Boston added three at 18:15 to extend the Stunts’ lead to 21-17.

Another scoreless jam ensued to keep the margin at four, but then the Smashies’ went on a 47-0 run on the next two jams to gain the lead and then some. A natural 20-pointer from Brickyard was followed by a 27-point power jam from the Educator, which gave the camo-clad troopers a 64-21 lead with 13:15 left in the period.

Boston stopped the Stunts’ scoreless drought with four on the next jam, whittling the margin to 64-25.

Shimmy Hoffa pushed the Smashies’ lead back to forty points with a four pointer scored at 10:40 that made the score 68-25. The Stunts’ Painguin countered with three on the next jam to make the margin a flat forty, a 68-28 score with 9:45 left.

The Smashies then went on a 13-1 run off three consecutive lead jams. Educator and Brickyard posted treys and Educator added a 7-1 jam with 5:50 left in the period to extend her squad’s lead to 81-29.

As the Stunts found themselves literally on the ropes in the title bout, they rebounded with two straight lead jams. One minor was in scope, one was massive. Boston’s solo point was followed by a 30-point power jam from Shiner recorded with 2:45 left in the frame that narrowed the margin to 81-60.

Not to be outdone by power jam heroics, the Smashies’ Brickyard countered with a 20-point power jam of her own on the period’s penultimate jam that extended the lead to 101-60.

Painguin posted four for the Stunts in the period’s final jam. Considering the equal derby experience, the propensity for scoring, and the overall depth both squads possess, the 101-64 lead for the Smashinistas at intermission to some was a little bit of a head-scratcher.

To begin second-half scoring, Boston posted seven for the Stunts on the period-opener to draw the differential to thirty points, 101-71. A 4-2 jam for the Smashies’ Brickyard extended her team’s lead to 105-73. The Educator added four with 26:00 left to widen the margin to 109-73.

The Stunts went on a 20-3 run off the next two jams to draw closer. Boston posted a pair of points and Shiner followed with an 18-3 strike on the next rotation to whittle the Smashies’ lead to 112-93 with 23:25 left in regulation.

Just when the purple rollers were literally knocking at the door, the Smashies’ tank rolled out a 40-0 rally off the period’s next five jams. Four from Brickyard was followed by five from the Educator that stretched the lead to 121-93.

A costly Stunts’ penalty resulted in a power jam for Brickyard that yielded 26 points, widening the gap to 147-93 with 18:10 left in the game. Hoffa added two and Educator posted three to finish the 40-point run that extended the Smashies’ lead to 152-93 midway through the frame.

Boston stopped the bleeding for the Stunts by collecting a natural 22-pointer at 13:25 to narrow the margin to 152-115. Shiner followed with two to cut the margin to 35 points, 152-117.

A Smashie 19-3 run on the bout’s next three jams extended the margin that pushed the lead to 171-120 with 7:27 remaining.

In the process, major battles were being waged between both squads’ battalion of blockers, much like a heavyweight prize fight. The rotations of the Smashies’ PolkaDot ‘Yr Eyeout, Shell Shoxx, The Forecloser, Sly Davinita, Megalodominator, Party Rockher, Boom Boom Pow, Mali Bruz Barbie and newcomer Cloak-N-Drag Her waged war with the Stunts’ Grave Danger, Mayor Francis Slayer, Morgan LeFaetal, Hydrogen Bombshell, Arcane Sugar,  Biohazard Betty, Vod KaKnockers, Chokehold Chanel No. 5, Shacgyver and Toe Stop Believin’.

A fifty-point lead this deep in a bout might be considered a lock for some. But then again, when the opposition is the Stunt Devils, a margin like this is anything but safe.

A 29-1 run by the Stunts over the next four jams made the bout a nail biter down the stretch. Boston collected a 20-point power jam with 4:14 left to narrow the Smashinistas’ margin to 171-140. Shiner followed with a 2-1 jam to push the deficit to 30 points. Boston posted four and Shiner added three on the bout’s penultimate jam to narrow the score to 172-149 with 1:04 remaining.

The last-jam scenario for the Stunts? Down by twenty-three points with little time left on the period clock.

The Stunt Devils came a calling. Boy, did they come a calling!

On the bout’s final jam, Boston raced to the front of the pack cleanly to become lead jammer with :47 remaining. After the Stunts’ wall released the Smashies’ Educator, Boston notched up four points to cut the lead to 172-153 with :27 left in the period clock.

Both jammers would break through with scoring passes to collect four points apiece to make the score 176-157 as the period clock reached goose eggs.

With the jam clock now sporting :56 remaining, Boston continued to rack up points on scoring passes. The Educator would collect three additional non-lead points before being sent off for a track cut with :20 remaining.

When the jam clock had expired – resulting in the official conclusion of play – Boston had been recorded as scoring 31 points on the jam off of seven reported scoring passes.

Altogether, the 31-7 jam recorded by Boston had resulted in an apparent 180-179 come-from-behind victory for the Stunt Devils, much to the shock to those at Midwest Sport Hockey.

At the moment, the Stunts had recorded the one-point victory and celebrated its first title win in three seasons.

But would the eye-opening triumph last?

The Smashinistas requested on-site to ARRG’s Head of Officiating a review of the points recorded during the final jam.

Although the crowd had filed out of Midwest Sport Hockey and the track was being deconstructed, the title bout was now under official review.

Meanwhile, members of both squads were quick to point out their team’s respective efforts in the championship bout afterwards, regardless of the outcome.

“My girls have working really hard all season,” said Smashinistas bench coach Debaucherous Prime.  “This is something we’ve been talking about in the locker room. This is a team effort, a season-long effort. You saw it out here on the track tonight. They did not just give up. I’m so proud of them to get to where they are.”

“The one thing that our team has going for us is that we play really well under pressure,” said Stunt Devil co-captain Grave Danger. “We are not a team that falls apart when we are faced against huge deficits. We’re really good at playing through adversity. I think that was illustrated in spades this evening. We did not go into the evening thinking that it was going to be an easy win for us or an easy win for them.”

Following a recommendation from the League’s Head of Officiating, the end championship result fell into the hands of ARRG’s Board of Directors, who would then render a final decision.

After reviewing and evaluating the situation on Sunday afternoon, the ARRG Board of Directors officially ruled that Boston completed six scoring passes that totaled 28 points, which was three points less than originally reported and recorded on-site at Midwest Sport Hockey Saturday night.

The end result was a 28-7 jam recorded by Boston for the Stunts in the final rotation, which made the Championship bout’s official final score 179-177 in favor of the Smashinistas.

The ARRG Board of Directors released an official statement late Sunday evening:

“After an exciting and controversial end to the ARRG 2013 Championship between the Stunt Devils and Smashinistas, it has come to light that there was a scoring error in the final jam of the game between Mighty Mighty Boston and The Educator.

The score at the beginning of the jam was 172-149 with the Smashinistas leading. Mighty Mighty Boston received lead jammer at the beginning of the jam and was originally reported to have 7 scoring passes (31 pts total) while The Educator was sent to the penalty box on her second scoring pass but not before scoring 7 pts bringing the score to what was originally reported 180-179 with the Stunt Devils announced as victor.

After an official review of the final jam, it is apparent that there was a scoring error and Mighty Mighty Boston only made 6 scoring passes (28 pts total) bringing the final score 179-177, making the Smashinistas the ARRG 2013 Champions for the first time.

We realize that this is a lackluster and disappointing announcement for both teams and for fans. It is unfortunate that the mistake occurred causing unprecedented challenges for our Officials staff. We are working with the Officials to develop stronger best practices to prevent future errors as well as establish protocol for handling final score discrepancies in a manner that is thorough and fair, but also respects the sense of urgency for providing a definitive outcome for our players and fans.

This was a tough decision for the Board of Directors and we don’t want to take away from either team but we can’t let a scoring error change the true outcome of the game. We want to congratulate the Smashinistas for their win and praise the Stunt Devils for the hard fought game that they played.”

With the championship win, the Smashinistas finish the local season with the franchise’s first-ever title win and a record of 4-1. Brickyard finished with over 100 points unofficially in the bout while The Educator added 67.

The second-place Stunt Devils conclude the local season with a 3-2 record. Boston paced the scoring unofficially with 100 points, followed by Shiner’s 66.

In the end, and no matter which way one’s pendulum swings, one will have to admit, this was one heck of a bout.

And one can bet that both teams are already salivating to face each other next season.

THIRD PLACE BOUT: M-80s 160  REBEL SKATE ALLIANCE 117

For the M-80s, being out of the title picture Saturday night was frustrating. They wanted to end the season on a high note against a team that wanted the same result.

The 43-point win for the firecrackers in the third place bout was just what the doctor ordered.

“We played clean,” said M-80s’ jammer EnYa Nightmare afterwards. “We had half the penalties that we had last game. Our jammer’s stayed out on the track and our blockers stayed clean.”

It had to be this way against the hard-charging RSA, a team that has progressed by leaps and bounds as the season progressed.

For the first few rotations, the play was extremely even.

Following a 4-4 stalemate off the opening jam, the M-80s’ IDA the Living Dead posted eight points to give the firecrackers a 12-4 lead with 26:30 left.

RSA countered with eight of their own with back-to-back four-pointers from Smarty McFly and Pink Diamond, resulting in a 12-12 tie.

The M-80s found their first surge of the bout with a 34-0 run off of the next four rotations. A pair of points from IDA was followed by eight from Molecular Mayhem, which gave the M-80s a 22-12 lead with 20:45 left in the period.

IDA added a 20-point power jam on the next rotation to stretch the lead to thirty. Nightmare’s two-pointer put the capper on the rally, which extended the M-80s’ lead to 46-12 with 17:15 left in the frame.

As the period progressed, RSA chipped away at the deficit. McFly’s 9-6 jam with 8:09 left in the period narrowed the margin to 59-33.

The M-80s then proceeded to post 23 points uncontested off back-to-back jams. Mayhem’s nine-pointer was followed by IDA’s 14-point strike that extended the M-80’s lead to 82-33 with 5:05 left in the first half.

RSA countered with back-to-back treys from Diamond and Chewblocka to pull to 82-39 after the half’s penultimate jam.

Nightmare’s four-pointer for the M-80s concluded first-period scoring, which stretched the lead to 86-39 at intermission.

A power jam for the M-80s started second period play. A 10-4 strike by Nightmare extended the lead to 96-43.

The M-80s continued the momentum as the period progressed. IDA’s 10-point power jam at 21:20 widened the margin to 121-44.

As seen numerous times this season, RSA began to surge in the second half. Chewblocka’s 17-point power jam on the next rotation narrowed the deficit to 121-61. She later added a 14-point power jam to whittle the margin to 125-75 with 13:34 left.

The M-80s staved the Rollin’ Rebs attack on the next jam with a 19-pointer scored by Nightmare that extended their lead back to 144-79.

Down, but not necessarily out, RSA launched a 25-0 rally from three jams. After Chewie’s 20-point power jam with 7:05 left, the M-80s clung onto a 152-104 lead.

Clock management became key down the stretch for the firecrackers. Stubborn blocking from Rhino-Might, May Require Stiches, The Ginger Assassin, Sp!ce Rack, Stray Touhell, Julia Ghoulla, Tregedy Ann and the returning Siege also helped the cause.

Despite being outscored 78-74 in the second half, the M-80s maintained their halftime advantage and took home third place with the 160-117 victory and finished the local season with a record of 3-2.

“I think this (win) is going to help our momentum,” said EnYa Nightmare, who finished with 56 points. “We had some new girls who were jamming, which really helps boost their morale. And we had two new skaters in the line-up as well. As a team as a whole, we’re coming together really well.”

IDA the Living Dead paced M-80s’ scoring with 76 points, unofficially. Molecular Mayhem scored 28 to notch a team personal best.

For RSA, Chewblocka’s trio of power jams yielded 50 points which paced her squad’s scoring ledger.

Even though the squad finished the local campaign 0-5, one would have to admit that this was the most misleading 0-5 team one could meet. The Rollin’ Rebs showed Saturday night that when the new local season launches later in the calendar year, they will be a very cohesive squad.

“Although we didn’t win this game, I’m really excited about the future of RSA,” said Smarty McFly, who finished with 33 points. “The losing sucks, but at the same time watching us play our best game of the season was really impressive.”

This is important as the team will again see a slight change in complexion during the local off-season. The loss of the retiring The Oregon Betrayal, Lady Macdeath and N’ Toss Ya will leave the squad with prime holes to fill in the blocking schema next season.

But on the upswing, the key core of veterans will return to the fold and this season’s progression of younger skaters such as Prof. Rumbledore, Warpath O’ Jen, Shear-Ra Powers and Hotrod Herbie certainly boost expectations.

“Shear-Ra has been super awesome and I think Rumbledore is Rookie of the Year,” said McFly.

The first overall pick in the next ARRG local draft will also help.

“What we’re looking for is a skater who is hungry for the game,” McFlay said. “If you see that hunger from that skater, that means that they are going to push themselves to become better players and they are going to be a benefit for your team. Like Shear-Ra Powers. She’s trying to make things happen.  You want someone like that.”

UNOFFICIAL SCORING

M-80s (160) – IDA the Living Dead 76, EnYa Nightmare 56, Molecular Mayhem 28

REBEL SKATE ALLIANCE  (117) – Chewblocka, 50, Smarty McFly 33, Pink Diamond 25, The Oregon Betrayal 9

SKATERS RETIRE FROM ARRG IN PRE-BOUT CEREMONY

Eleven retiring skaters from the league were honored in a pre-bout ceremony Saturday night. For some, Saturday night marked their final bout with the Arch Rival Roller Girls in a skating capacity.

The retiring intraleague skaters honored Saturday night included:

Smashinistas –  PolkaDot ‘Yr Eyeout and Boom Boom Pow. Stunt Devils – Biohazard Betty, Toe Stop Believin’ and DollyRot N. M-80s – The Sound of Violence. Rebel Skate Alliance - The Oregon Betrayal, Lady MacDeath, N. Toss Ya and Spider Monkey. ARRG Fleur De Linquents - Trajec Tory.

(CLICK ON THE THUMBNAILS TO SEE FULL-SIZED IMAGES)

Some skaters elect to remain with the league and serve in volunteer capacities. So even though you may not see them skating on the flat track anymore, there’s a good bet that you’ll see many still showing their love for the sport as either a volunteer or a fan.

Congratulations to all the retiring skaters and thank you for your service and dedication to the league!

ALL-STARS TO RETURN IN CLOSED BOUT SUNDAY VS. SCDC

A brand new travel season begins this weekend for the ARRG All-Stars…and the first opponent in the 2013 campaign is a memorable one.

For the first time ever, ARRG faces St. Chux Derby Chix Pack in Black (1-0) in WFTDA-sanctioned action this Sunday in a closed bout.

The ARRG All-Stars, the league’s “A” travel team, come into the match-up currently ranked eighth in the WFTDA North Central region after finishing last season 11-5.

The team ranked high as fourth in the region in 2012, but a 1-3 finish at last September’s North Central region playoff in Niagara Falls dropped ARRG to its current position.

However, the slate is wiped clean and the team will have a very busy schedule in the next couple of months. In fact, the team already has three bouts scheduled for March.

The team charters twenty skaters and fourteen are rostered to play in a bout. Many familiar faces return to this year’s squad and some new additions compliment the line-up.

The trio of Mighty Mighty Boston, South City Shiner and Black Market Baby return to the jamming rotation this year. Additions to the charter in the jammer position include EnYa Nightmare, who last played with the All-Stars in 2011, Brickyard, who makes her initial appearance with the “A”-squad and Pink Diamond, who makes her ARRG All-Star charter debut.

Leading the blocking schema are returning veterans Grave Danger, Eli Wallop, May Require Stitches, Science Friction, Chewblocka, Shimmy Hoffa, The Educator, Smarty McFly, The Oregon Betrayal, Mayor Francis Slayer and Morgan LeFaetal.

Blockers Rhino Might, Prof. Rumbledore and Hydrogen Bombshell are new additions to the ARRG All-Star charter.

The team is already projected as “ones to watch” in 2013 as they are currently ranked #24 in the latest Power Rankings by Derby News Network, which independently ranks WFTDA-sanctioned travel teams internationally.

And this year’s travel season features a new twist as it progresses. Although the WFTDA North Central will retain league rankings within the region for tracking purposes, all WFTDA-sanctioned teams competing (currently 172 leagues internationally) will now be assessed by a newly-formulated “rankings calculator.” The top 40 WFTDA leagues ranked at the end of the regular season cycle will be eligible for the WFTDA Division 1 playoffs.

In short, gone is the traditional WFTDA region playoff format. It’s now the chase to be one of the best forty internationally…and that now means that every travel bout is an important one.

ARRG’s opponent this Sunday has already had a quick sprint out of the gates to start 2013. Coincidentally, it’s also the league that is closest in proximity to ARRG.

St. Chux Derby Chix – Photo Credit: Jeff Higgins

Established in 2009, the St. Chux Derby Chix out of St. Charles County became a charted WFTDA-sanctioned league last September.

The honor was richly deserved. During its one-year WFTDA apprenticeship, the Pack In Black amassed a 10-3 record against comparable leagues. After it became a full-fledge WFTDA member last September, the league split its next two bouts and gained an inaugural ranking of #31 in the WFTDA North Central.

That provided enough of an incentive…and SC/DC made an impact to start 2013.

The Pack in Black upset North Central #22 Demolition City 212-123 two weekends ago in St. Peters in its season opener.

Or maybe it wasn’t such an upset. For those who follow derby locally know that St. Chux has done all the right things that past few seasons to make itself a pretty well-oiled machine. With years of derby seasoning by veterans, rapid progression in skill sets by younger additions and improvements in conditioning overall, SCDC has progressed into a league that could potentially make a very realistic charge into the WFTDA Division 3 playoff schema.

Although there is a wide differential in the current ranking between the two, this is the type of bout that realistically benefits both leagues and a projected outcome is not guaranteed.

We’ll see how both teams answer the challenge on Sunday.

Even though the bout is closed to the public, we’ll have a full bout recap next Monday in the ARRG Newscenter!

Muckety Muck and Magilla Guerilla are bout co-announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check in this section on Monday’s for the latest in ARRG news and information.

by Muckety Muck, ARRG Bout Co-Announcer      UPDATED MONDAY 3/4/13 AT 1 AM

(ST. LOUIS COUNTY, MO) Following a review by the Arch Rival Roller Girls’ Board of Directors on Sunday, the final score of the ARRG 2013 Local Championship bout has been revised.

The final score has been officially rendered a 179-177 victory for the Smashinistas over the Stunt Devils.

The score was confirmed by ARRG’s Board of Directors Sunday evening.

Following Saturday’s title bout at Midwest Sport Hockey, it had appeared that the Stunt Devils had claimed a 180-179 victory over the Smashies.

With 1:04 left in the second period’s main clock, the Smashinistas were holding onto a 172-149 lead.

After the Stunts’ Mighty Mighty Boston collected lead jammer status, she continued the jam after the period clock had expired. As the remaining :56 displayed on the official jam clock ticked away, Boston continued with scoring pass after scoring pass. Conversely, Smashinistas’ jammer The Educator scored non-lead points.

When the jam clock had expired – resulting in the bout’s official conclusion – the Stunt Devils had apparently outscored the Smashinistas 31-7 in the final jam, resulting in a 180-179 come-from-behind victory for the Stunt Devils.

Following the one-point Stunts’ win, the Smashinistas requested to ARRG’s Head of Officiating a review of points recorded during the final jam.

After reviews by both officiating and the League’s Board of Directors on Sunday, it was determined the points scored during the bout’s final jam would be corrected and officially recorded as 28-7 Stunts.

As a result, the final official score for the Championship bout was revised as a 179-177 win for the Smashinistas.

The title win is the first-ever for the Smashinistas, who finish the season 4-1.

The ARRG Board of Directors released the following statement to the League (and approved for release to the public) Sunday evening:

“After an exciting and controversial end to the ARRG 2013 Championship between the Stunt Devils and Smashinistas, it has come to light that there was a scoring error in the final jam of the game between Mighty Mighty Boston and The Educator.

The score at the beginning of the jam was 172-149 with the Smashinistas leading. Mighty Mighty Boston received lead jammer at the beginning of the jam and was originally reported to have 7 scoring passes (31 pts total) while The Educator was sent to the penalty box on her second scoring pass but not before scoring 7 pts bringing the score to what was originally reported 180-179 with the Stunt Devils announced as victor.

After an official review of the final jam, it is apparent that there was a scoring error and Mighty Mighty Boston only made 6 scoring passes (28 pts total) bringing the final score 179-177, making the Smashinistas the ARRG 2013 Champions for the first time.

We realize that this is a lackluster and disappointing announcement for both teams and for fans. It is unfortunate that the mistake occurred causing unprecedented challenges for our Officials staff. We are working with the Officials to develop stronger best practices to prevent future errors as well as establish protocol for handling final score discrepancies in a manner that is thorough and fair, but also respects the sense of urgency for providing a definitive outcome for our players and fans.”

This was a tough decision for the Board of Directors and we don’t want to take away from either team but we can’t let a scoring error change the true outcome of the game. We want to congratulate the Smashinistas for their win and praise the Stunt Devils for the hard fought game that they played.”

A full recap of Saturday night’s bouts will be featured in the news section of archrivalrollergirls.com on Monday afternoon.

ADDITIONS, SUBTRACTIONS AFFECT LOCAL SQUADS!

After months of intense training, scrimmages and bouts, the local season reaches its pinnacle this Saturday night as the Arch Rival Roller Girls present the 2013 League Championships!

In the championship finale, the Stunt Devils (3-1) battle the Smashinistas (3-1). Prior to the main event, the M-80s (2-2) and Rebel Skate Alliance (0-4) compete in the League’s third place bout.

The double header takes place at Midwest Sport Hockey (570 Weidman Rd., Ballwin, MO). Doors open at 6:30 pm and the first whistle blows at 7 pm.

Tickets on bout night are $15 cash only at the door. Children 10 and under get in free. Save $3 per ticket by purchasing online at Brown Paper Tickets at THIS LINK RIGHT HERE! (Note: Online sales end late Friday night!)

As Saturday proceeds, two teams will end the local season on a high note. Conversely, two squads will lick their wounds and prepare for next season. And with some very important pre-bout additions by all four squads via a supplemental draft a few weeks ago, picking favorites this weekend become difficult.

For the Stunt Devils, they return to familiar territory in the title bout. For the past six seasons, the purple rollers have been in the championship match. However, the Stunts have had a long stretch since lifting the trophy. The last time they hoisted hardware was 2010.

Boston

Saturday night might be the moment that that streak is broken. Thanks to consistent scoring and top-notch blocking last month, the Stunts dispatched defending ARRG champions the M-80s by 80 points in the playoff round.

All the things that have worked well for the Stunt Devils throughout the regular season were executed to perfection last month. Jammers Mighty Mighty Boston, South City Shiner and Mayor Francis Slayer posted strong efforts. All three will be back in the fold this weekend and expect all to be “impact players.” Stunt addition Killer Painguin will also supplement the jamming rotation.

The blocking was also top-notch in February. Veteran Grave Danger anchored the charge, while Morgan Le Faetal, Hydrogen Bombshell, Dolly RotN, Biohazard Betty, Shacgyver, Arcane Sugar, Toe-Stop Believin’ and Vod KaKnockers contributed valuable minutes. The depth displayed will once again be imperative for the Stunts Saturday night.

But there are question marks following the team. Veteran Stunt blocker Deathica Steele suffered a knee injury during a travel tournament in early February and she is out for the title bout. That will undoubtedly leave an imperative hole to fill.

Chokehold

To compensate, the Stunts drafted a returning veteran. Chokehold Chanel No. 5, a former ARRG All-Star in the late-00’s, dons purple colors this weekend. A skater who can assume multiple roles, Choke can be a “difference maker” in her first bout with a brand new team. This will be her third local squad in her ARRG tenure and one can expect that her presence will be immediately felt.

It’s been a while since we’ve paired the words “Stunts” and “champs” in the same sentence. No doubt, the missive this weekend will be to return to former glory.

Meanwhile our other championship finalist – the Smashinistas – has never held the title-winning status. In fact, the last time they had an opportunity for the trophy was the same night the Stunts last won the title.

Educator

But that was then and this is now and the complexion of the Smashies has changed considerably in three seasons. One could argue that Saturday’s line-up is its most solid ever-fielded.

In the playoff round, the Smashinistas dismantled Rebel Skate Alliance by 141 points. And much like their championship counterparts, depth has been paramount in a solid local season campaign. Key components return for the squad’s first potential title win.

The jamming tandem of The Educator and Brickyard each posted triple digits in February’s playoff round. They’ll be supplemented by Shimmy Hoffa in the rotation.

PolkaDot

The integral aspect to the line-up will be the solid blocking corps, paced by veterans PolkaDot ‘Yr Eyeout, Boom Boom Pow, The Forecloser, Shell Shoxx, Megalodominator, Sly Davinita, Party Rockher and Mali Bruz Barbie.

One key cog missing in the Smashies’ machine this Saturday is veteran skater Eli Wallop. The All-Star went down with injury earlier this year and is out of the championship mix. As a result, the aforementioned skaters will have to assume additional minutes and responsibilities.

The Smashies also added some depth via last month’s draft with selection of Cloke n’ Drag-Her, who came through ARRG’s developmental system.

The work this season from the camo-clad troops has been outstanding overall. They don’t want to throw this prime opportunity away.

Although it is a given that a new local champion gets crowned this Saturday night, the favorite to pick is anyone’s guess. The experience and depth displayed by both squads will undoubtedly result in a match-up that could potentially reach epic proportions.

The team that wins the title will have definitely deserved it.

Meanwhile, plenty of intrigue also surrounds the third place bout.

Stitches

Last season’s League champions the M-80s suffered a setback in February’s playoff round. The squad, hampered by a shortened bench, lost by 80 points to the Stunt Devils. The firecrackers didn’t like the fizzle. They look to rebound with a sizzle.

Jammer EnYa Nightmare is set to prove why she’s so doggone good. The veteran posted over 30 points in the playoff round. IDA the Living Dead posted comparable numbers as well. She’ll have to arguably have her best bout yet in her rookie campaign this Saturday night. Multi-positional starter May Require Stitches is used to high minutes, whether donning the star or not. Expect her to make a difference.

Rhino

Pacing the packs will be co-captains Rhino-Might and The Ginger Assassin, who have respectively jumped leaps and bounds in their responsibilities this season. And look for the steadily-improving Sp!ce Rack, Molecular Mayhem, Julia Ghoulia and Stray Touhell to also contribute heavily.

The M-80s have also added some depth heading into the third place bout as the squad acquired blocker The Siege, a long-time red-clad vet who can hold opponents at bay.

Standing in their path for third place is the pesky counter clock-wise collaborative known as Rebel Skate Alliance. Despite a winless record heading into the third place bout, one will have to admit that RSA has steadily improved as the season has progressed.

Chewblocka

There’s good reason to feel confident if one feels intergalactic. Veterans Smarty McFly, Chewblocka and Party Foul propel the squad in numerous capacities. Jammer Pink Diamond continues to improve and post impressive results.

Rookie Prof. Rumbledore has been put in key situations that belie her length of tenure. Veteran pivot Ginny Beastly has also churned out her best work yet.

Beastley

Also key will be the return of ARRG 2012 Rookie of the Year The Oregon Betrayal, who was not in the line-up for the playoff round. Sophomores Warpath O. Jen, Deuce Bomber and N’Toss Ya and rookie Lady MacDeath will also be featured in prime situations.

The on-track tryout last month of rookie Shear-Ra Powers paid off in spades for RSA. The squad picked her up full-time via last month’s draft due to her performance. They also added to the line-up jammer Hotrod Herbie, a hard-charging transfer from the Metro East.

RSA historically has always been considered a “wild card” for knowledgeable ARRG fans. Saturday night might be the night that the Rollin’ Rebs get back onto the winning side of the ledger.

The undercard will showcase what both these teams have had to battle through the regular season. Expect both to come out full-throttle to pick up an imperative victory.

While you’re at Midwest Sport Hockey, be sure to stop by the official ARRG merchandise table to help propel your team to victory. Support your favorite local squad as they compete for an important “W!”

Also visit the charity raffle table, where tickets can be purchased for $1 apiece or six for $5. This season, ARRG’s charity partner is CHADS Coalition of St. Louis. Charity raffle prizes include ARRG bout tickets, gift certificates from area businesses and other collectibles. Remember, you can’t win if you don’t participate!

This Saturday night, ARRG puts the capper to an extremely competitive local season. You’ll want to stick around until the very end to see how it all shapes up!

We’ll see you this Saturday at Midwest Sport Hockey for the ARRG 2013 Local Championships!

For updated information as the week progresses, visit ARRG’s official Facebook page. On Sunday, we’ll have exclusive interviews and footage from Championship night!

NEXT MONDAY IN THE ARRG NEWSCENTER: Find out what happened in length at this Saturday’s double header. We’ll have full recaps of both bouts!

Muckety Muck and Magilla Guerilla are bout co-announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news/information.

310-60 VICTORY OVER CRUSH LAUNCHES 2013!

By Muckety Muck – ARRG Bout Co-Announcer – Photos by Bob Dunnell

(COLLINSVILLE, IL) For one brief moment Sunday afternoon, Vod KaKnockers was speechless.

However in this case, it was for all the right reasons. KaKnockers, a skater with ARRG’s Fleur-De-Linquents – the league’s C-team of travelers – held in her hands a multi-colored trophy after her team’s 310-60 victory over the Confluence Crush Heartbreakers at Gateway Center.

One could see the twinkle in her eye as she looked at its shiny inscription…”MVP Jammer.”

For the sophomore skater – whose primary role on her local ARRG team is that of a blocker – the recognition was overwhelming.

“I’ve never won one of these before,” Vod beamed. “I’m so happy.”

For the 400 in attendance, the purpose of the ‘Quents became crystal clear from the outset. It’s an opportunity for skaters to develop their skill sets against other leagues in a competitive environment.

“A lot of us have scrimmaged against the Crush in the past,” said co-captain Warpath O. Jen. “We know they’ve been working really hard. What we were trying to work on was soul-crushing, to cap off skaters and keep them from recycling. That’s what we were trying to accomplish today.”

After the 250-point season-opening win, there was little doubt that the FDL’s exceeded all those expectations.

“I think we did some great blocking and our jammers were able to bust through their walls,” said KaKnockers. “My girls were great in crushing the walls.”

Confluence Crush – a new apprentice league with the Women’s Flat Track Derby Association – was certainly game, but inevitably the FDLs established themselves as a dominant force against their upstart opponent.

Following a bout-opening 4-0 jam from CCRD’s Looney Luna, the De-Linquents scored 22 straight. Prof. Rumbledore’s 18-point power jam was followed by four from Warpath O. Jen, resulting in a 22-4 lead with 25:15 left in the period.

The Heartbreakers countered with a dozen points scored off a power jam that spanned two rotations. Calamity Cat scored four at 24:15 and Luna added eight to narrow the Fleur-De-Linquents’ edge to 22-16 with 22:40 left.

After Jen added two non-lead points on the next rotation, CCRD’s Five Finger Disco posted four to tighten the margin to four points, a 24-20 FDL lead at the 20:10 mark.

The ‘Quents capitalized with a Crush jammer sitting in the box on the next rotation. Rumbledore scored 19 for the FDLs with 18:10 left in the period to extend the margin to 43-20.

A solo point by the Heartbreakers’ Roxy Ruthless and a pair tacked on by teammate Honey Pumpkin Flower narrowed the gap to 43-23 midway through the period.

The FDLs rolled out a 53-0 rally off the bout’s next four jams. Punctuated by Jen’s 19-pointer at 12:46 and Rumbledore’s 25-point power jam two rotations later, the visitors stretched their advantage to 96-23 with 9:35 left in the period.

Flower powered a four-pointer for CCRD, but ARRG’s Julia Ghoulia fired back and scored seven with 7:30 left for the FDLs, widening the gap to 104-27.

A pair of Fleur-De-Linquent power jams yielded 55 points to finish the first half. KaKnockers’ penultimate 25-pointer was followed by Molecular Mayhem’s 30-pointer to give the FDLs a 169-30 lead at intermission.

The Heartbreakers’ Peek A Bruiser collected two on the second period’s opening jam, but then the De-Linquents’ walls clamped down hard, holding the Crush scoreless for close to sixteen minutes.

In the process, the FDLs churned out a 93-0 rally. Jen notched a natural fifteen to expand the lead to 184-32 at the 26:05 mark. Mayhem added an additional 15 off the power jam two rotations later to push the score to 204-32. Back-to-back power jams for Rumbledore and Jen netted 24 and 19 points, respectively, which widened the margin to 258-32 with 13:45 left. Rumbledore finished the rally with four points scored at 12:00 to give the FDLs a 262-32 lead.

Significant in the Crush’s scorless stretch was the tight walls created by the FDL blocking schema, which included the aforementioned ARRG skaters as well as MVP blocker Bertha Venus, Deuce Bomber, Sp!ce Rack, Dollyrot N, Shacgyver, Stray Touhell, Party Rockher and Trajic Tory.

A 25-4 power jam collected by The Ginger Assassin continued the attack and stretched the margin to 291-96 with 8:40 left.

The Fleur-De-Linquents outscored the Heartbreakers 141-30 in the second half to pick up the 310-60 season-opening win.

Rumbledore paced the FDLs with 94 points unofficially, followed by Jen’s 87.

Even with the powerful victory, the FDL brain trust knows that there’s still more to be learned as the year progresses.

“Our team needs to work a lot more on communication, just like it is with any sport,” said Warpath O. Jen afterwards.

But for Sunday, the message sent was clear. These skaters have important goals to achieve in 2013. And with performances like Sunday’s, there’s a pretty good chance they’ll reach them.

Future Fleur-De-Linquents’ opponents are potentially scheduled, but not solidified. We’ll keep you posted here in the ARRG Newscenter on any future dates.

UNOFFICIAL SCORING

ARRG FLEUR-DE-LINQUENTS (310): Prof. Rumbledore 94, Warpath O’ Jen 87, Molecular Mayhem 50, Vod KaKnockers 38, The Ginger Assassin 29, Julia Ghoulia 7.

CONFLUENCE CRUSH HEARTBREAKERS (60): Joanie Rollmoan 15, Loony Luna 14, Peek A Bruiser 11, Honey Pumpkin Flower 6, Five Finger Disco 4, Calamity Cat 4, La Chola Loca 2, Roxy Ruthless 1.

ARRG TO BE FEATURED IN ILLINOIS PRINT COVER STORY

If you’re an ARRG fan living in the Metro-East, you may want to check your mailbox later in the week.

Four skaters with Illinoisan connections will be featured in the weekly “The Edge” insert, published by the Edwardsville Intelligencer.

Reporter Krista Wilkinson-Midgley interviewed skaters Brickyard, Mali Bruz Barbie, Prof. Rumbledore and Dollyrot N for the cover story, which will be delivered to residents in Madison County this Thursday and Friday.

The feature will also contain action pictures from local derby photographer Bob Dunnell.

For those who live outside the Madison County area, check ARRG’s Facebook page later in the week for a link to the electronic version of the story.

TWO ARRG VETS ADDED TO ROSTERS VIA DRAFT!

(ST. LOUIS, MO) A pair of ARRG veterans were added to the fold in the latest round of the League’s supplemental draft, held last week in St. Louis.

Altogether, six skaters became rostered members of the league and all are eligible to play in the final event of ARRG’s local season, held Saturday, March 2 at Midwest Sport Hockey in Ballwin, MO.

The Stunt Devils, who will play in the League’s championship bout, selected with their lone pick ARRG veteran Chokehold Chanel No. 5, who had previously skated with the Smashinistas for four seasons (2006-09) and with the M-80s (2011).

Choke, a multi-positional player who excels at jammer, was also a three-year member of the ARRG All-Stars during its 2007-09 campaigns.

The M-80s, who will play in the league’s third place bout next month, selected The Siege, a blocker with two prior tours of duty with the firecrackers. Siege skated with the M-80s locally from 2007 to 2009 as well as a one year run during its 2011 campaign. The vet has competed with both the ARRG All-Stars and the Saint Lunachix b-team.

The M-80s also selected last week Newbie Corey, who impressed many at ARRG’s local practices and scrimmages.

The Smashinistas, the other league championship finalist, selected with their lone pick Cloak and DragHer, who came up through ARRG’s developmental system.

Rebel Skate Alliance selected with their two picks Sheer-Ra Powers, who skated with the team as an unrostered rookie in February’s local playoff round and Hotrod Herbie, a jamming transfer from Confluence Crush Roller Derby of Illinois.

Congratulations to all six skaters!

NEXT WEEK IN THE ARRG NEWSCENTER: Just around the corner are the 2012 ARRG Local Championships. In the finals, one team makes its sixth consecutive trip to the title bout while one looks for its first ever trophy. In the undercard, both teams have changed in complexion since their first bout of the season. All four have added firepower for an added boost. There’s so much to keep track of. We’ll sort it all out heading into the local season’s finale.

Muckety Muck and Magilla Guerilla are bout co-announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news and information.

PLUS, C-TEAM PREPARES FOR FIRST BOUT OF 2013

By Muckety Muck, ARRG Bout Co-Announcer – Photos by Bob Dunnell

(BLOOMINGTON, IN) The Saint Lunachix – the B-travel team of the Arch Rival Roller Girls – flexed a lot of muscle and finished in third place at the third-annual B-Cup Tournament this past weekend.

The round-robin tournament of eight took place at the Bleeding Heartland Rollergirls’ Cardiac Arena.

The Saint Lunachix, seeded third, finished the event with a 2-1 record following a 276-71 victory over the Detroit Derby Girls’ Disassembly Line Sunday afternoon.

The Chix, a B-Cup newbie competing in their first set of bouts in 2013, charged hard in their quarterfinal match on Saturday morning against sixth-seeded Grand Raggidy G-Rap Attack and posted a 225-66 victory.

Then in the B-Cup semifinals later that day, the Saint Lunachix competed in a topsy-turvy battle against second-seeded Charm City Junkyard Dolls of Baltimore. The bout featured numerous ties and lead changes throughout, but penalties plagued the Chix down the stretch and the locals fell 197-154 to drop to the B-Cup’s third-place bout on Sunday.

Sunday’s “Bronze Cup” match-up for third saw the Chix face a surly Detroit B-Team, the event’s top seed that fell to fourth-seeded Naptown by 237 points in Saturday’s other semifinal.

Little did anyone know that the Chix would be saving their best for last.

ARRG SAINT LUNACHIX 276   DETROIT DISASSEMBLY LINE 71

The Chix utilized a quick sprint out of the gates and racked up a 40-3 lead after four jams. A bout-opening eight-pointer by jammer EnYa Nightmare was followed by four from Brickyard to give the Chix a 12-0 lead.

ARRG’s Pink Diamond then scored eight and twenty individually off power jams in the next two rotations to stretch the lead to 40-3 with 22:40 left in the period.

Detroit’s Catch-La-Fever scored a natural grand slam on the next jam to whittle the lead to 40-8.

The Saint Lunachix went on a 37-1 surge as the period progressed. Punctuated by Brickyard’s natural 20-pointer scored at 14:10, this Chix upped the score to 77-9 with 12:00 left in the period.

The Chix maintained the cushion in the backstretch of the first half. Jammer Killer PAINguin posted 14-points at 5:45 to push the margin to 91-22.

Nightmare later scored 15 points via a power jam at 2:04 to extend the lead to 110-22.

The Lunachix posted a 118-32 lead at intermission.

The second period featured plenty of penalties from both squads. But whereas Detroit found points few and far between, the Lunachix continuously went to the pay window with a Motown jammer in the box.

Up 123-35 five minutes deep, PAINguin collected an 18-point power jam to push the Chix’s lead to 141-35. ARRG rookie IDA the Living Dead later added a 14-point power jam with 20:00 left to extend the lead to 164-30. Diamond added a 19-point power jam four minutes later to make the score 185-63.

The trend – and the thumping – continued as the period continued. Nightmare scored 15 with 11:00 left to push the Chix above the 200’s, a 208-63 advantage. She later added 19 via a power jam with 4:30 left to stretch the score to 241-71.

Meanwhile, the Lunachix blocking schema continued to put the hammer down defensively, allowing little if any traction for Detroit. The Disassembly Line were held to three lead jams in the entire second half.

The Saint Lunachix outscored Detroit 158-32 in the second half to pick up the 205-point victory, improve to 2-1 overall and finish third at B-Cup.

Congrats to the roster of twenty that competed and brought home bronze: Nightmare, Brickyard, PAINguin, Diamond, IDA, Deathica Steele, Party Foul, Arcane Sugar, The Forecloser, Hydrogen Bombshell, Shell Shoxx, Sp!ce Rack, Morgan LeFaetal, Shacgyer, The Oregon Betrayal, Julia Ghoulia, Megalodominator, Rhino-Might, Ginny Beastley and  The Ginger Assassin. You did St. Louis derby proud!

The Saint Lunachix next play the Kansas City Roller Warriors’ Plan B on Saturday, April 13 at Midwest Sport Hockey.

ARRG’S C-TEAM TO COMPETE THIS SUNDAY

The League’s C-Team of travelers launches its 2013 campaign with a bout against an opponent that hails from the other side of the Mississippi.

ARRG’s Fleur-De-Linquents face the Confluence Crush Heartbreakers this Sunday afternoon in a double header event that is set to start at 1:30 pm at the Gateway Center in Collinsville, IL.

The Fleur-De-Linquents – now in its third year of competition – is comprised of members from the four local ARRG squads as well as unrostered skaters that have met skill set requirements.  They oppose both C-Teams from established WFTDA Midwestern leagues and primary travel teams from smaller derby leagues.

Last July, the team picked up its most historical win to date, a 136-92 victory over the Chicago Outfit Shakedown in St. Louis. The squad also competed last calendar year against the Cincinnati Flock Ewes, the Dark River Derby Coalition of Quincy, IL and the MO-KAN Roller Girls.

This Sunday’s roster for the Fleur-De-Linquents looks like this (as of press time): Vod KaKnockers, Prof. Rumbledore, The Ginger Assassin, Bertha Venus, Deuce Bomber, Shacgyver, Sp!ce Rack, IDA the Living Dead, Stray Touhell, Julia Ghoulia, Party Rockher, Dollyrot N, Molecular Mayhem, Trajec Tory, Warpath O Jen and Chokehold Chanel.

They face one of the newest apprentice leagues of the Women’s Flat Track Derby Association. Confluence Crush Roller Derby, which practices and competes in Madison County, IL, played their first set of bouts in 2012.

To start their 2013 season, the team lost to the Eastern Iowa Outlaws 399-61 on January 19.

We’ll have a full recap of the Fluer-De-Linquents’ bout next Monday in the ARRG Newscenter.

ARRG PARTICPATES SATURDAY’S MARDI GRAS PARADE

Photos by Thomas Ricks, KTVI/KPLR

To see his photo album (safe for work, mind you!) go to THIS LINK RIGHT HERE.

Muckety Muck and Magilla Guerilla are bout co-announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls.Check back in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news and information.

PLUS, CHIX TO COMPETE AT B-CUP TOURNEY THIS WEEKEND!

By Muckety Muck, ARRG Bout Co-Announcer – Photos by Bob Dunnell

(BALLWIN, MO) The top two seeds of the 2013 ARRG local playoff round posted strong wins and gained title berths Saturday night in front of 650 at Midwest Sport Hockey.

The top-seeded Smashinistas bested fourth-seeded Rebel Skate Alliance 261-120 while the second-seeded Stunt Devils ended the championship defense of the M-80s with a 183-103 victory.

The Smashies and the Stunts, both 3-1, will meet in the League’s championship bout on Saturday, March 2 at Queeny Park.

The M-80s (2-2) and Rebel Skate Alliance (0-4) will battle in the League’s third place bout on the undercard.

The results from this past weekend guaranteed that a new champion will be crowned next month. The two finalists last faced each other for the trophy in 2010, which marked the last season the Stunts hoisted hardware.

SMASHINISTAS 261  REBEL SKATE ALLIANCE 120

By design this season, the top-seeded Smashinistas have implemented a pre-bout ritual before the first whistle blows.

“We have decided to put everything that we have going on before a bout aside and come together and meditate,” said Smashie blocker The Forecloser. “We try to become one as a team and forget about what has happened to us today. We usually try to meditate anywhere between one and three minutes.”

An additional ritual Saturday night consisted of each Smashie writing a pair of words in permanent marker on some part of their respective bodies. They served as a visual reminder that could be referenced as the semifinal bout against RSA progressed.

For The Forecloser, the words written read “communication” and “strength.” For teammate Shell Shoxx, the words were “strength” and “focus.”

The two moments of reflection worked effectively in the Smashies’ 141-point semifinal victory over RSA.

The Smashies barreled out to a 28-0 lead following the bout’s first three jams, punctuated by a 23-point jam by The Educator five minutes in.

The lead was stretched to 43-4 three jams later following Educator’s nine-point power jam.

Ten minutes deep into the frame, the Smashie’s “inner strength” achieved maximum results. Another power jam, this time paced by sophomore jammer Brickyard, netted 28 points and pushed the camo-clad troopers’ lead to 71-4.

The surge continued as the period progressed. Brickyard’s nine-pointer scored with 14:00 left in the period extended the Smashies’ lead to 88-10.

Then Rebel Skate Alliance achieved its own “moment of zen” and racked up a 30-0 rally on the next three rotations. RSA rookie jammer Prof. Rumbledore posted an 18-point power jam which was then followed by four points from Party Foul and eight by Smarty McFly. The quick streak whittled the deficit to 88-40 with 8:00 left in the period.

Going back to its original methodology, the Smashinistas followed the Rollin’ Rebs’ rally with a 24-2 run. Beginning with Educator’s 20-point power jam at 6:30, the Smashies stretched the margin to 112-42 following four from Brickyard one jam later.

Mightily, RSA tried to keep pace, thanks to a baker’s dozen scored on the next three jams that narrowed the gap to 112-54.

Then in the period’s final jam, the Smashies capitalized on their fourth power jam of the stanza, resulting in 20 points for Brickyard and a comfortable 132-54 lead for the top seed at intermission.

The trend continued in the second period as The Educator picked up twenty on a period-opening power jam that extended the Smashinistas’ lead to 152-54. The advantage widened to 193-66 with 17:30 left.

RSA, already short-handed with a bench of ten (which included an unrostered skater permitted by the league in order for the team to field a squad), utilized anybody and everybody in the jammer rotation. RSA rookie Lady MacDeath opened eyes with a 15-point power jam scored with 15:20 left to make the score 193-81.

Steadily, the Smashie tank kept rolling and destroying as the period progressed, thanks to the solid work of the aforementioned Forecloser, Shoxx, Polka Dot Yr’Eyeout, Megalodominator, Party Rockher, Shimmy Hoffa, Mali Bruz Barbie, Sly Davinita and Boom Boom Pow. Their lead blossomed to 256-93 with 6:40 left.

RSA broke triple-digits down the stretch, thanks to a 20-point power jam scored by Party Foul on the bout’s penultimate jam.

The Smashinistas outscored RSA 129-66 in the second period to net the 141-point semifinal win, improve to 3-1 and vault into the league’s championship bout.

“We really work together, communicate so much together on the track and we’re really having a good time doing it,” said Smashie blocker Shell Shoxx afterwards.

The tandem of The Educator and Brickyard recorded over triple digits individually. The former collected 121 unofficially while the latter scored 110.

“The Smashies are such a hard-hitting team and they’re so good at controlling the pack,” acknowledged RSA’s Rumbledore after the bout.  “They’re also really good at picking one person and beating the crap out of them.”

For the second bout in a row despite small numbers, RSA improved collectively as a unit. Four separate jammers collected twenty points apiece during the bout, paced by McFly’s 27.

“We changed our jammer rotation in hopes that maybe we could solve some of the problems that we’ve been having,” added Rumbledore, who finished with 24 points. “It didn’t totally work out. We did have a hard loss, but we fought hard and I’m proud of my team.”

And future adjustments to the line-up, one that will be stronger with skater returns, newfound rookie confidence and potential additions via a soon-to-be held supplemental draft, makes one optimistic about RSA in their March 2 bout against the M-80s for third place.

“From what we’ve discussed tonight, we’re definitely going to have to get a more solid jammer rotation,” said Rumbledore. “Actually train people to become jammers, which is something that we haven’t really done yet.”

“I actually think that we might have a chance against them because one of our defensive walls, when we’re working together, is pretty solid, especially off the line,” she continued. “And I think we need to work on our jammer penalties. I think that if we can do that, then we can beat the M-80s.”

Meanwhile for the Smashies, the future is extremely promising for a title trophy lift next month, considering the troopers defeated their championship opponents earlier this calendar year.

“I was really hoping to face the Stunt Devils (in the finals),” said Shoxx. “They’re really hard competition.”

Calmly, The Forecloser approaches March’s title bout with introspection.

“We are going to be a team,” she said. “It’s about being a team out there so we need to make sure that we focus on that. Don’t lose track of what it is we’re there to do, which is to win.”

UNOFFICIAL SCORING

SMASHINISTAS (261): The Educator 121, Brickyard 110, Shimmy Hoffa 30

REBEL SKATE ALLIANCE (120): Smarty McFly 27, Pink Diamond 24, Prof. Rumbledore 24, Party Foul 24, Lady MacDeath 18, Shear Ra Powers 3

STUNT DEVILS 183  M-80s 103

After Saturday’s other semifinal had concluded, one knew that there were now three constants in life: death, taxes and the Stunt Devils appearing in ARRG’s Championship bout.

The 80-point win over the league’s defending champions netted the purple rollers their sixth consecutive appearance in the league’s title finale.

“I can say for sure that this was a team victory (from) start to end,” said Stunt Devils’ veteran Mayor Francis Slayer afterwards. “Everybody played really great. We played as a team. We worked out strategy that we’ve been working on and I actually scored some points.”

Some points, your honor? How about unofficially 87 in the semifinal against the scrappy M-80s! Considering that in her prior six seasons combined, the veteran pivot had scored total career points that could be counted on two hands, the high output that paced the team Saturday night was jaw-dropping.

“I feel really great about this game, both personally and mostly on a team level,” Slayer said.

Following a bout-opening four-pointer from M-80s’ jammer EnYa Nightmare, the Stunts posted 42 points uncontested. Slayer scored 15 via a power jam, resulting in a 15-4 lead change with 26:30 left.

South City Shiner followed with eight and Mighty Mighty Boston added six on the next two rotations to extend the lead to 29-4. Shiner added a baker’s dozen off a power jam at 21:40 to cap the 42-0 Stunt rally and extend the lead to 42-4.

Nightmare stopped the M-80s’ ten minute scoring drought with a trey at 18:40 to whittle the lead to 42-7, but a 14-3 power jam by the Stunts’ Boston at 16:10 pushed the margin to 56-10.

To their credit, the M-80s didn’t panic as the period progressed and used a 20-4 run to make bout’s ratio 2-to-1, a 60-30 Stunts’ advantage with 8:45 left in the period.

A 5-2 non-lead jam by Nightmare whittled the margin to 62-35 with 6:10 left.

Unfortunately for the M-80s, another huge surge of Stunt points ensued, resulting in a 37-0 run. Boston’s four-pointer was followed by Slayer’s 25-point power jam at 3:45 that pushed the Stunts’ lead to 91-35. Shiner and Boston each followed with four on the next two rotations to extend the lead to 99-35.

On the period’s final jam, the M-80s gained quick ground in short order. Jammer May Require Stitches, the league’s current reigning MVP, netted 18 points as the clock reached goose eggs.

Seeing how strong the Stunts were in the first half, consider it a moral victory for the M-80s to only be down 103-53 at halftime.

The skating seemed more controlled in the second period for both squads. The play was cleaner and the penalties had dropped, which worked to the M-80s’ benefit as they were able to methodically chip away at the 50-point deficit in the second period’s first six minutes, resulting in a 30-10 run.

M-80s’ rookie jammer IDA the Living Dead finished the rally with a 15-point power jam scored at 24:10 that narrowed the gap to 113-83.

And just when it seemed that the M-80s could make the bout the usual nail biter that we’ve come to expect from these two squads historically, the Stunts literally locked the door. Jammers clad in purple netted the next ten lead jams.

The Stunts’ scoring throughout the stretch was peppered with four pointers, and thanks to solid positional blocking by essentially every member of the Stunt walls, the squad pushed its lead to 143-90 with 10:00 left.

Time ticked away on the M-80s defending championship reign, and the deficit inevitably became insurmountable. The Stunts outscored the M-80s 80-50 in the second half to pick up the 183-103 semifinal victory.

“It was a tough loss,” said the M-80s’ Stitches afterwards. “Everything just kind of came at once. Penalties….we fell apart for a second. In the second half, we came back as a team and we started to get it together, but we just didn’t have enough time.”

The M-80s now prepare for a battle against the hard-charging RSA in the league’s third place bout in four weeks. The top priority on the checklist? Fewer trips to the box.

“I think that’s our biggest challenge…penalties,” assessed M-80s’ co-captain The Ginger Assassin. “If you’ve looked at our season, we’ve had a lot of penalties with both our jammers on track cuts and our blockers out of play. So those are some things that we really going to have to start focusing on.”

“We’ll go back to the drawing board,” added Stitches.  “We’ll come back together and work as a team, we’ll work on walls and not go the penalty box. Just basic derby.”

And the back to the basics approach served the Stunts well Saturday night. Next month, they have to display the same style against the Smashies, a team that beat them by 25 points in January.

“They’re a really tough team,” said Slayer of the opposition. “We know that we have our work cut out for us. When we played them last, we didn’t play our best team game. We fell apart against pressure a little bit.”

And what will it take for the Stunts to hoist their first trophy since 2010?

“We need to make sure that we keep our minds cool and our walls strong,” said Slayer. “We’ve got to keep everything top-notch at Championships. It’s going to take that to beat that team.”

UNOFFICIAL SCORING

STUNT DEVILS (183): Mayor Francis Slayer 87, South City Shiner 51, Mighty Mighty Boston 45

M-80s (103): IDA the Living Dead 38, EnYa Nightmare 33, May Require Stitches 32

SAINT LUNACHIX HEAD TO B-CUP TOURNEY THIS WEEKEND

It was not all that long ago that a competitive “b-team” was considered a luxury for a WFTDA-sanctioned league. These days, due to the rapid rise in competitiveness nationally, a solid “b-team” is now considered a necessity.

This weekend, ARRG’s b-team interleague squad – the Saint Lunachix – are in a quest to pick up their first-ever tournament championship.

The Bleeding Heartland Rollergirls host the third annual B-Cup Tournament, beginning this Saturday at BHRG’s Cardiac Arena in Bloomington, IN. The two-day tourney features eight squads in a round-robin style tournament.

The invited teams were seeded in the tourney based upon the current national rankings of their respective league’s “A” squads.

The seedings for the tourney are as follows: (1) Detroit Motor City Disassembly Line, (2) Charm City Junkyard Dolls, (3) ARRG Saint Lunachix, (4) Naptown Warning Belles, (5) Nashville Music City Brawl Stars, (6) Grand Raggidy G-Rap Attack, (7) Bleeding Heartland Code Blue Assassins and (8) Fort Wayne SWAT Team.

In the opening round on Saturday morning at 11 AM Eastern, the third-seeded Lunachix face sixth-seeded Grand Raggidy G-Rap Attack. The winner of that bout moves on to face the winner of the Charm City/Bleeding Heartland match-up in a semifinal bout scheduled for 2 PM Eastern.

The championship bout of the “B-Cup Tourney” takes place on Saturday night at approximately 7:40 PM Eastern. The third place bout and all other consolation bracket bouts take place on Sunday.

In short, the team that nets three victories on Saturday wins the “B-Cup” outright. Not bad for a day’s work!

This is the first time that the Lunachix have competed in a structured tournament. There’s plenty to be excited about for the rollers from Saint Louis for they have been historically one of the most successful b-squads in the Midwest.

Last year, the Chix finished with a record of 9-2, which included wins over Kansas City, Cincinnati, Madison and Nashville. Since 2009, the Lunachix have a cumulative record of 29-6, which ranks extremely high against other b-teams nationally.

The primary reason for this trend is the amount of talent, experience and depth that the Lunachix bring to the flat-track. Such will be the case again in Bloomington this weekend for the squad’s first bouts of 2013. For the tournament, the league can bring 20 skaters…and what an impressive line-up it is!

Veteran Chix jammer EnYa Nightmare and sophomore Brickyard will don the star this weekend, providing an immediate offensive punch. But if they are silenced, awaiting in the wings are ARRG rookie Ida the Living Dead, veteran Morgan LeFaetal and ARRG’s 2012 Rookie of the Year The Oregon Betrayal.

The rest of the pack has plenty of depth as well. Longtime Chix blocking lynchpin Deathica Steele will be joined by the cunning Party Foul and the hard-charging Rhino-Might.

And that’s just the beginning! Also on the B-Cup roster are the following:  Ginny Beastley, The Ginger Assassin, Shell Shoxx, The Forecloser, Boom Boom Pow, Hydrogen Bombshell, Spice Rack, Arcane Sugar, Shacgyver, Megalodominator, Julia Ghoulia and Killer Painguin.

I don’t know about you, but I think this “b-team” could realistically compete against some of the lower-tiered WFTDA “A” squads and net success, hands-and-skates down.

That’s not to say that there isn’t a lot of talent to be found from the other seven squads competing this weekend in Bloomington. And quite honestly, the real “X-factor” of the weekend depends on who the other leagues field on their respective B-Cup rosters.

Here’s a look at some of the other teams competing at B-Cup this weekend:

1) Detroit Motor City Disassembly Line (0-0): This will be Motown’s first bout of 2013, where they face eighth-seeded Ft. Wayne. An impressive 37-point win over Ohio’s Gang Green last October helped the disassemblers finish 2012 at 4-1.  A rejuvenated roster with plenty of depth makes the top seed a likely semifinal candidate, where they would meet the Naptown/Nashville quarterfinal winner Saturday afternoon. Cotton Candy Princess, Kraken Whips, Midnight Vulture and Sufferin’ Sucka Bash returns to the fold for the Disassembly Line.

2) Charm City Roller Girls Junkyard Dolls (4-0 locally): The WFTDA lynchpin from Baltimore sends one of its league’s four local teams to the B-Cup. For those who follow ARRG, this would be comparable to defending ARRG league champions the M-80s competing in a travel team tourney. The Dolls, currently undefeated in intraleague play, advanced to CCRG’s League Championship bout with a 41-point win two Saturdays ago. They have averaged close to 200 points per local bout. Dolls’ captain Red Pepper and Adrenaline Junkie pace the jammer corps while veterans Holly Go Hardly and Quick Shot Kitty lead the blocking schema. They draw the host squad in the opening round.

4) Naptown Warning Belles (1-0): The travelling developmental from Indy finished 2012 with a 6-3 mark, which included a victory over ARRG’s Saint Lunachix at last June’s Midwest Brewhaha Invitational. They decimated the Cincinnati Violent Lambs last month at home, 313-66, to kick off the season on a high note. Considering the road trip is only around 60 miles one-way for the Belles, expect them to arrive fully-stocked against quarterfinal opponent Nashville. Speed skater Willa Hoeflinch and Honey Badger will don the star throughout while blockers Salacious T and Shiva Diva look to help control the packs.

5) Music City Brawl Stars (0-0): Nashville’s entry saw a 2012 finish of 5-4, including a 76-point win over Brewcity’s Battlestars which served as a high point. Wins over weaker competition pushed the record over the .500 mark. This weekend launches their 2013 campaign. With a lot of late retirements to their A-squad last season, numerous Brawl Stars were called up. Who remained on the roster is difficult to predict, but jammer Stella Live, who scored 60 against the Chix last year in Brawl Star loss, is projected. A round one match-up against Naptown is a tough draw.

6) Grand Raggidy G-Rap Attack (0-1): The rollers from Michigan had an extremely busy 2012, finishing with a 7-7 record. A 2-1 finish at last November’s Mitten Kitten Mash-Up saw the Attack post victories over Killamazoo and Ann Arbor. The start to 2013 began on a sour note as the Attack was upended by Traverse City’s Toxic Cherries, a Michigan-based USARS A-team, 203-76, in late-January.  Returning G-Rap starters Keisha Mei Ash, Ringo Deathstarr, Xtreme Tac and Curvy Dog pace the squad from Grand Rapids.

7) Bleeding Heartland Code Blue Assassins (1-0): If there was ever a “sleeper pick” to potentially go deep at the tourney, it would be the hard-charging seventh-seeded host. In 2012, the CBAs finished 6-5, which included victories over the b-teams from Ohio and Brewcity. The Assassins notched their first victory of the season with a 212-130 win over Ft. Wayne in mid-January. With home cookin’ in their favor this weekend, a first round upset over the Charm City intraleaguers is not out of the realm. The Chix upended the CBA’s last year at home in an extremely competitive bout. Jammer Dirt Diggler and blocker Uh Huh Hurricane return for the CBA’s.

8) Ft. Wayne SWAT Team (1-1): The rollers from up-state Hoosier State finished last season 2-2 with victories posted over Chicago Outfit’s Shade Brigade and NEO’s Audio Assault. They started their 2013 campaign with a 193-123 victory over the South Bend Roller Girls Bonnie Dooms three weekends ago. An 81-point loss to host BHRG Code Blue Assassins evened their record to 1-1. They draw top-seeded Detroit in round one.

Muckety Muck and Magilla Guerilla are boutco-announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news and information.

(BALLWIN, MO) The top two seeds of the Arch Rival Roller Girls’ playoff round utilized hard charges out of the gates and cruised home to victory Saturday night at Midwest Sport Hockey.

The top-seeded Smashinistas rushed to a 28-0 lead off the semifinals’ first three jams in route to a 261-120 victory over fourth-seeded Rebel Skate Alliance.

The Stunt Devils – the playoff round’s second seed – used a 42-0 early first period push to top the third-seeded M-80s 183-103 in the other semifinal.

The Smashinistas and the Stunt Devils now face each other at the ARRG 2013 Championships, set for Saturday, March 2 at Midwest Sport Hockey.

A 23-point jam by Smashinista jammer The Educator at the 25-minute mark set the tone in their playoff win over RSA. The Smashies held a 132-54 lead at intermission following a period-ending 20-pointer by jammer Brickyard. The top seed outscored RSA 129-66 in the second half to pick up the title bid and improve to 3-1.

The two Smashie jammers each scored triple-digits on the evening as The Educator unofficially notched 121 points while Brickyard followed with 110.

In the other semifinal, the Stunt Devils – down 4-0 after the opening jam – netted a 15-point power jam by Mayor Francis Slayer on the next rotation, resulting in a 15-4 lead change. The Stunts added 27 more on the next five jams to stretch their margin to 42-4.

Up 103-53 at intermission, the Stunt Devils outscored the M-80s 80-50 in the second period to pick up the 80-point victory, improve to 3-1 and advance to the league’s title bout next month.

Slayer finished the evening with 87 points unofficially.

The Saturday night setbacks by RSA and the M-80s resulted in the two squads meeting each other for the league’s third-place bout, also held on March 2.

Full recaps from both bouts will be featured at archrivalrollergirls.com on Monday morning.

Check ARRG’s official Facebook page on Sunday afternoon for exclusive interviews with skaters from all four squads from Saturday night.

WINNERS TO MEET IN MARCH CHAMPIONSHIP BOUT!

by Muckety Muck, ARRG Bout Co-Announcer

After a bone-crushing regular season, the four local squads of the Arch Rival Roller Girls collectively tighten up the laces and prepare to take big strides in the quest of a championship trophy!

This Saturday night, ARRG presents its 2013 Playoff Round, held at Midwest Sport Hockey (570 Weidman Rd., Ballwin, MO). Doors for the double header open at 6:30 pm. The action begins at 7 pm.

Tickets at the door this Saturday night are $15 cash only. Children 10 and under get in free. Save $3 on each advance ticket by purchasing them online at Brown Paper Tickets by going to this LINK RIGHT HERE. Groups of 15 and more can purchase tickets for as low as $10. (Online sales end this Friday night. Plus, if you elect to recieve your tickets via will call this Saturday, there are no additional costs!)

In the opening bout of ARRG’s playoff double header, the top-seeded Smashinistas (2-1) face fourth-seeded Rebel Skate Alliance (0-3). Following that contest, the Stunt Devils (2-1) and the M-80s (2-1) renew their rivalry in the #2 vs. #3 match-up.

Victories by a pair of rollers this Saturday night determine the teams that will compete in the marquee match-up of the 2013 ARRG League Championships, set for March 3 at Midwest Sport Hockey. Meanwhile, the teams that suffer setbacks will drop to the League’s third place bout.

With three squads finishing the regular season with identical 2-1 records, point differential determined the playoff’s seedings. Now with the mathematics out of the way, a championship berth is anyone’s for the taking.

This is definitely in the mindset of the top seed, the Smashinistas, this Saturday night. To start off the calendar year, the camo-clad skaters upended the Stunt Devils for the first time since February 2011. The 155-130 win was paramount in reaching atop the League’s hierarchy.

Educator

Jammers The Educator and Brickyard scored 75 and 68 points, respectively, but don’t let those numbers mislead you. January’s win was a team win and in order for the Smashies to make their first ARRG title trip since 2010, it’s got to be that way again this Saturday.

“For us, we’re really going to have to concentrate on our team work, our aggression and making holes for our jammers,” says Smashinistas’ co-captain Shimmy Hoffa. “Just making sure that we’re all on the same page. Awareness is a huge deal with our sport, reacting to our own teammates and to our opposition.”

PolkaDot

Assisting Hoffa in the blocking rotation will be co-captain Polka Dot Yr’Eyeout, Eli Wallop, Shell Shoxx, Boom Boom Pow, The Forecloser, Megalodominator, Party Rockher, Sly Davinita and Mali Bruz Barbie.

It’s been a long time since we’ve seen the Smashies in the Championships. The road may not be easy as it would customarily seem for a top seed…for the opposition is just as hungry.

Diamond

Rebel Skate Alliance experienced a huge surge of momentum despite a loss earlier this year at Midwest Sport Hockey. The 140 points posted against the M-80s was 60 points higher than their team average through their first two regular season bouts. Jammer Pink Diamond posted an ARRG personal best of 58 points, followed by Smarty McFly’s 47.

January’s bout was a confidence booster for the intergalactic skaters. It was the type of performance that can propel a team looking for a post-season upset.

The squad will get a boost in scoring as jammer Spider Monkey – who notched 37 points in her ARRG debut back in November – returns to the rotation after a one bout absence.

Party Foul

Key will be the front walls set up by the RSA blocking schema, paced by veterans Ginny Beastly, Chewblocka, Party Foul and Bertha Venus. Sophomores N’ Toss Ya, Duece Bomber and Warpath O’ Jen will also see plenty of track time alongside rookies Prof. Rumbledore and Lady MacDeath.

Although the sport may seem complex at first to the uninitiated, RSA’s game plan will be simple this Saturday night for all to follow.

“We’re going to go out and play the best roller derby that we can,” said McFly. ‘Nuff said!

Saturday’s second match-up doesn’t really need a lot of background for those long-time fans of ARRG: Stunts vs. M-80s….thank you and good night!

But in all sincerity, this bout will more than likely deliver the same intrigue that always surrounds these two legacy teams.

Case in point: the last time these two squads played last November, the bout was a topsy-turvy three-point nail biter determined on the final jam.

Shiner

“We have gone up against (the M-80s) so many times,” says Stunt Devils’ jammer South City Shiner. “We’ll just have to put our noses up against the grindstone. We want to have an ‘on-night’ on ‘game night.’”

Shiner has certainly had her “game-on” this season. Finishing second in individual regular season scoring, the veteran brings a 70-plus points per bout average into the playoff round. Mighty Mighty Boston follows with 60-points plus per bout. Mayor Francis Slayer and Killer Painguin have also netted ARRG personal scoring bests this regular season.

Danger

The purple-clad front line returns to the grindstone. Blockers Grave Danger, Deathica Steele, Morgan LeFaetal, Biohazard Betty, Toe-Stop Believin’, Arcane Sugar, Hydrogen Bombshell, Dollyrot N., VodKa Knockers and Shacgyver plan to deliver the punishing blows expected.

A second seed does not guarantee an automatic trip to the League Championships for the Stunts, considering ARRG’s defending champs stand in their path.

Nightmare

The M-80s impressed many with their 81-point victory over RSA in January. Even more impressive was the fact that they did this with only ten skaters, which meant high percentages of jams competed for all.

Veteran EnYa Nightmare posted 64 points in the bout and May Require Stitches added 49 while pulling triple-duty as jammer, blocker and pivot. Rookie jammer Ida the Living Dead netted 27 to continue her impressive inaugural ARRG season.

Rhino

All three will also see time up front to assist the blocking, paced by hard-charging co-captains Rhino-Might and The Ginger Assassin. The steadily-improving Spice Rack, Molecular Mayhem, Stray Touhell and Kimical Burn will also be in the mix, while veteran Julia Ghoulia makes a return after a one bout absence.

With the roster thin and the competition thick, the defending champs know that the workload is going to be heavy in Saturday’s playoff donnybrook.

“We’re an extremely hybrid team this year,” said Rhino-Might. “I think we’re going to come out strong. We’ve tweaked a few things in our practices that are really going to help us transition to how the Stunts play.”

The “firecrackers on quads” would love nothing more than to defend the title outright in March’s marquee match-up with a solid victory.

There’s plenty to see this Saturday off the flat track as well.

Support your favorite ARRG squad at Midwest Sport Hockey by visiting the ARRG merchandise table. New t-shirts featuring some of the local squads are now in stock, as well as noise makers to propel your team to victory.

Also visit ARRG’s charity raffle table and see what you can win. One of two prize baskets, featuring Championship night tickets as well as gift certificates and items donated by local businesses, could potentially be yours with the purchase of raffle tickets. Our charity raffle drawing benefits this season’s sponsored charity, CHADS Coalition of St. Louis. Tickets are $1 apiece or six for $5!

After Saturday’s bouts, continue the derby fellowship at ARRG’s official post-bout after party, located at Atomic Cowboy (4140 Manchester Avenue, St. Louis, MO.) While visiting the eclectic hot spot located in the “Grove” section of St. Louis, you can relive your favorite moments of the night with the athletes of ARRG while enjoying late night specials. As per custom, there is no cover charge to partake in the post-bout after party at Atomic Cowboy!

For up-to-the-moment information throughout the week, visit and “like” ARRG’s official Facebook page.

This weekend, we’ll take all the aforementioned statistical mumbo jumbo and throw it aside. After all, that’s what makes post-season derby so much fun!

We’ll see you this Saturday night at 7 pm at Midwest Sport Hockey for the 2013 ARRG Playoff Round!

Check this area Saturday late-night for a quick recap of the double header, ARRG’s Facebook page on Sunday for exclusive skater interviews and back in this section on next Monday for full recaps of both bouts.

ANNUAL ARRG TRIVIA NIGHT A HUGE SUCCESS!

This past Saturday night at the German Cultural Society in St. Louis, ARRG held its Fifth Annual Trivia Night, where proceeds supported the operational costs associated with the league.

Long story short, the event sold out! Over 300 competitors matched wits in an eclectic array of categories.

Monies were also raised via a silent auction, which once again netted fantastic donations as well as a bake sale that helped competitors soak up the libations aand 50/50 drawing that netted one lucky individual over $700! Thanks to all the local businesses, organizations and individuals for their donations and contributions to the event. And we want to thank the competitors for their support of the league! It is much appreciated and we look forward to hosting another trivia night early in 2014!

We’ll keep you up to date in the Newscenter for future fundraising activities that both support ARRG as well as other non-for-profits that are associated with the League!

ARRG SKATER FEATURED IN BILLBOARD CAMPAIGN!

If you have driven on I-44 Eastbound near Hampton Avenue recently, your eyes were not deceiving you. There’s an Arch Rival Roller Girl a fixed upon a billboard.

ARRG’s South City Shiner is featured as a part of a new visual art campaign implemented by radio station KDHX-FM 88.1, a long time supporter of roller derby.

The community-oriented, non-profit broadcaster is raising awareness in order to assist with the public phase of its capital campaign. The goal of the campaign is to raise funds for its “in-development” home base located at Grand Center.

Shiner’s billboard is one of six used in the campaign. Other billboards, which hit every main artery of St. Louis commutes, feature local personalities such as Schlafly Beer’s Tom Schlafly, rapper Tef Poe and professional wrestler “Gorgeous” Gary Jackson.

The Riverfront Times’ Mabel Suen sheds more light on the campaign at the RFT’s website at this LINK RIGHT HERE!

To find out more about KDHX-FM, go to this LINK RIGHT HERE!

NEXT MONDAY IN THE ARRG NEWSCENTER: Along with recaps from ARRG’s playoff round, we’ll look at a preview of the two-day “B-Cup Tourney” featuring ARRG’s Saint Lunachix travel squad. Plus, the league makes a return to one of the biggest sports trivia nights in the nation and to arguably the largest Mardi Gras Celebration in the world! We’ve got a jam-packed column lined up for you!

Muckety Muck and Magilla Guerilla are bout co-announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news & information.

FUNDRAISER HELPS LEAGUE WITH ASSOCIATED COSTS

By Muckety Muck – ARRG Bout Co-Announcer

It’s that time of the year again…a time to match wits and simultaneously help the league.

The Arch Rival Roller Girls host their fifth annual ARRG Trivia Night this Saturday at the German Cultural Society (3652 South Jefferson, St. Louis, MO). Doors open for the event at 6 pm. Trivia begins at 7 pm.

Tables of ten players can be registered for $200 per table at Brown Paper Tickets by going to THIS LINK RIGHT HERE! Individual players can show up on event night and pay $20 at the door.

The cost of admission not only guarantees a fun night of trivia, but also unlimited soda, wine and Pabst Blue Ribbon beer. (Outside alcohol is not permitted.)

Teams and individual participants are welcome to bring their own food to the event.

Per custom, categories will cover a wide range of subject matter. Expect questions pertaining to the follow categories: pop culture, sports, music, St. Louis-specific trivia, literature, as well as other eclectic subject matter.

And there’s plenty of ways to help boost your team’s score Saturday night. Mulligans that eliminate any “blanks or errors” on your team’s answer sheet can be purchased for $1 per round. Also each round, you can check with Rebel Skate Alliance blocker (and Jeopardy Champion!) Bertha Venus and see if one answer per round is correct with a $1 donation per round. (Muckety’s Memo: utilizing these methods often result in a table grabbing the win.)

A silent auction, featuring donations from various local businesses and individuals, a raffle drawing and an “ARRG bake sale” with sweet treats will also be at the event.

ARRG All-Star blocker Grave Danger will be your “Mistress of Ceremonies” for the evening.

Monies raised at ARRG’s Trivia Night go towards the operational costs associated with the league.

This is, hands down, one of ARRG’s biggest (and honestly, most fun) events of the season. And even if you don’t consider yourself a “brainiac,” you’ll have to admit that the camaraderie experienced will make it an enjoyable evening.

We’ll see you this Saturday for ARRG’s fifth annual Trivia Night!

SAINT LUNACHIX PREPARE FOR FEBRUARY TOURNEY!

The “B-travel team” for ARRG – the Saint Lunachix – is set to compete in the upcoming “B Cup Tourney,” held Saturday and Sunday, February 9 & 10 in Bloomington, IN.

The third annual event – hosted by the Bleeding Heartland Rollergirls – takes place at Cardiac Arena in downtown Bloomington.

The eight-team, round-robin style tournament features primarily Midwestern teams. B-teams from Detroit, Indianapolis and Nashville will be participating at the event.

Seedings for teams at the “B-Cup Tourney” were based upon the current WFTDA rankings of each league’s respective “A-team.” As a result, the Saint Lunachix was given the third seed. They will face sixth-seeded Grand Raggidy in the opening round on February 9.

We’ll have a full preview of the “B-Cup Tourney” on the Monday prior to the tournament.

ARRG INDIVIDUAL SCORING LEADERS (AFTER THREE BOUTS)

1. The Educator   Smashinistas  261

2. South City Shiner   Stunt Devils  233

3. Brickyard   Smashinistas  222

4. EnYa Nightmare   M-80s  204

5. Mighty Mighty Boston  Stunt Devils  186

6. Black Market Baby  M-80s  146

7. Pink Diamond  RSA  139

8.  May Require Stitches  M-80s  93

9. Smarty McFly  RSA  84

10. Ida The Living Dead  M-80s  81 

Muckety’s Musings: Prior to the beginning of the local season, one had to wonder how the loss of high-profile jammer Downtown Dallis would affect the Smashinistas in the scoring column. Seeing how the camo-clad troopers occupied two of the top three positions in individual scoring after the regular season, one NOW has to wonder what would have happened if she were in the mix? Smashie jammer The Educator was the sole ARRG jammer to post triple digits in an individual bout this regular season, a 106-point output on opening night. In fact, the long-tenured vet posted career-best numbers to quash any Smashie worries. If one’s lowest output in a bout was merely 75 points, then that’s a good problem to have.

The Stunts’ Shiner, always a consistent performer, recorded benchmark numbers to grab the regular season’s  second slot. Her 95 points recorded in December marked a high point personally. She will arguably shy away from her numbers, but one does have to recognize the effort. The Smashinistas’ Brickyard posted solid returns in her sophomore campaign. A 90-point bout in November marked a personal best. The “one-two punch” of Educator and Brickyard proved a lethal combo against the competition.

Nightmare, finishing fourth in the regular season, continued the consistent numbers she records in local bouts. The veteran notched 82 in December against a stubborn Smashie defense. The Stunts’ Boston might have taken a step back in the regular season scoring column, but a 60-point per bout average is still mighty, mighty impressive. As anticipated, she arguably will be one to watch closely in the playoff round.

Rebel Skate Alliance’s Diamond and her regular season finish in points was a definite bright spot for a team that is, self-admittedly, still looking for a consistent jammer rotation. A regular season without injury certainly improved the final output for the veteran. The M-80s’ Stitches, while pulling triple duty as a blocker and pivot throughout the regular season,  lands in the eighth spot thanks to a 49-point effort a one weekend ago.

McFly’s scoring output was from only two bouts. The veteran played solely as a blocker in bout one. She netted 47 points earlier this month to show that she can still be a nemesis while donning the star. Rookie Ida the Living Dead netted an eye-opening 51 points in her November ARRG debut for the M-80s. The output dropped to single digits in bout number two, but the scoring rebounded earlier this month and provided enough ammunition for her to make a hard charge for ARRG’s 2013 Rookie of the Year.

As always, number like the ones posted above would not be possible if not for the solid work of the blockers and pivots that lay down the groundwork for scoring. In fact, some of the pack play has been some of the best witnessed historically. Considering that this season has seen the implementation of new rule sets that affect game play, the work has been solid across the board.

NEXT WEEK IN THE ARRG NEWSCENTER: The playoff approaches! The local ARRG squads prepare for the February 2 double header that sends two squads to March’s title tilt. We’ll preview the bouts!

Muckety Muck and Magilla Guerilla are bout co-announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section Mondays for the latest in ARRG news and information.