by the Grand Poobah

(PART TWO OF TWO) See Part One HERE!

It was 51 weeks ago that the Arch Rival Roller Girls first set into motion its quest to take a journey…a journey to unprecedented heights.

At the 2009 WFTDA North Central Regional in Minnesota, the ARRG All-Stars wrapped up its inaugural trek into national tournament play with a sixth-place showing.

Since then, the schematic was put into place to make a return trip in 2K10. A trip to join the other 39 nationally-ranked teams who would be considered “the fortunate ones” - the ones who were invited to run the gauntlet, each hoping that all the sweat equity invested in a physical sport would lead to a trip to the proverbial paywindow…which could potentially result in the hoisting of the WFTDA Hydra Trophy at tourney’s end.

But the goal of ARRG since September 2009 was modest - to first return to regionals…and to subsequently finish better.

And that time is now.

This Friday, the post-season arrives as the ARRG All-Stars face the Naptown Tornado Sirens of Indianapolis in the opening round of the WFTDA North Regional, held this weekend at the Brown County Arena in Green Bay, WI. The complete bracket can be found HERE.

Nationally, four separate regionals are held featuring the top ten teams selected and invited by the WFTDA. The top three finishers in each respective regional advance to November’s WFTDA National Championship Tournament in Chicago, IL.

Friday’s 10 AM opener at “Thunda on the Tundra” finds eighth-seeded ARRG (5-9) facing a squad that is experiencing its first-ever WFTDA post-season tournament.

Naptown (8-3) comes into the post-season as the North Central’s ninth seed - a major accomplishment for a squad whose franchise has travelled a similar path this season as ARRG did the prior year.

And perhaps that’s where the similarities end.

To the uneducated, Naptown’s greater winning percentage might lead some to believe that the Tornado Sirens could pull of the “lower-seed” upset in round one.

And although there is potentially the chance that THAT could happen in the ARRG/Naptown bout - there is a three-word phrase that somewhat throws that philosophy out the window - strength of schedule.

As noted last week, ARRG has faced this season 12 teams that have made the 2010 WFTDA National Tournament, whereas Naptown has only faced two.

That’s not meant to be a knock against Naptown’s schedule - you play a travel team whenever you can regardless of size - but the caliber of competition played this season falls to the favor of the Gateway City.

In short, tough losses against highly-seeded teams bring about experiences that are invaluable - not just for skaters individually, but for teams who make modifications for improvement as the season progresses.

Most will admit that although ARRG enters “Thunda on the Tundra” with a four-game losing streak, the squad played its most complete effort of the season against North Central sixth-seed North Star three weeks ago. ARRG battled North Star throughout - even posting a late lead - before falling 80-75.

Yet even in defeat there were plenty of positives to take away from that contest, and a boost in confidence is perhaps the best remedy heading into the post-season.  

Artemischief

ARRG jammer Artemischief has been a fixture of this two-part series…and with good reason. The focal point of the offense has scored 20 or more points ten times this season, including a 51-point tally against highly-ranked Jet City earlier this season. Needless to say, when Artemischief wears the star, good things happen.

Complimenting Artemischief are derby vets South City Shiner and Enya Nightmare, who have notched personal bests this season, as well as Black Market Baby, an All-Star call-up who has greatly impressed St. Louis’ derby fans in 2010. Morgan LaFeatal and Downtown Dallis can also don the star as well.

The blocking corps include All-Star vets Eli Wallop, Grave Danger, Davey Blockit, The Educator, Domme E. Nation, Punches Pileup and Chewblocka.

ARRG workhorse Mayor Francis Slayer - another perennial All-Star - leads the group at pivot.

As a whole, it’s a very experienced line-up for the locals - and one that has to be firing on all cylinders effectively against a team from the Hoosier State that brings a lot of miles logged to the dance as well.

Naptown started out 2010 in dominating fashion by handing out beatings to Derby City of Louisville (2225-18) and Memphis (151-35).

Following a February loss to North Central rival Grand Raggidy, the Sirens bested Sioux Falls and posted back-to-back wins over the Ohio Roller Girls to head into the annual Ft. Wayne Spring Roll Invitational with a record of 5-1.

At the Spring Roll, Naptown defeated host Ft. Wayne before falling to Detroit 150-94.

In June, the Sirens journeyed to the highly-competitive East Coast Derby Extravaganza, which resulted in a split with a four-point win over Maine and a 122-106 loss to the DC Rollergirls.

Naptown (Photo: Tom Klubens)

A five-point win on the road against the Chicago Outfit (94-89) rounded out the regular season for Naptown, who finished 8-3 which included a perfect 4-0 mark at home.

In eight victories, the Tornado Sirens outscored opponents 1080-478. As impressive of a tally that is, it is somewhat misleading as lopsided wins over inferior opponents pad the statistics.

The scouting report on Naptown shows that this is an excellent defensive team, meaning that when the opposition obtains lead jammer status, the Sirens excel at controlling the pace of the pack.  This inevitably leads to few points scored per jam by the opposition.

At the forefront of the blocking scheme is Siren vet Cereal Killer, who made the transition from rugby to derby flawlessly a few years back. Proficient at both blocker and pivot, Killer provides the spark that ignites this squad. She also holds the distinction of being the “team mouthpiece,” and isn’t afraid to yap at opponents to throw them off their game.

Offensively, the Sirens tend to go with “jammer by committee.” Yet, they are experienced with the likes of jammers Racer Xtacy, Maiden America, Amooze Booche, Noxious Donna and Olive Spankins donning the star.

There is one prerogative for Naptown this weekend - to prove that its invite to the tourney is no fluke.

In this battle for ARRG, a winning outcome will rely on two P’s: patience and penalties - a lot for the former, minimal for the latter.

As the Naptown squad is known for throwing opposition off by playing “mind games,” the locals will have to keep tempers in check, as skaters in the penalty box usually leads to vulnerable scoring opportunities against them. And THAT can’t happen at this level.

Regardless of the outcome, the winner will face a tough journey throughout “Thunda on the Tundra,” as the other eight teams competing in Green Bay bring solid - and experienced - squads to the dance.

Now for a look at the remainder of the top ten seeds at the North Central Regional…

(1) Windy City Rollers (3-3) Last year’s North Central regional winner receives its first round bye via wins over North Star and Madison…and arguably its legacy. However, there could be some cracks in the armor of one of the most dominant franchises in the Midwest. Some critics say that this is still THE team to beat.

(2) Detroit (9-2) But conversely, one would find enough ammo to give this dominant squad a shot at the regional title. The second seed from the Motor City also received a bye in round one. ARRG Nation knows firsthand how good this squad is with its 130-point win over the locals last month.

(3) Mad Rollin’ Dolls (1-7) A misleading record perhaps. A lopsided win over Houston and a close bout against Boston helped its cause. The Dolls have faced excellent competition this season, including 2009 National Champ Oly. Pummeled by Denver a few weeks ago. Faces North Star in round one.

(4) Cincinnati (9-3) Another familiar team to the locals - they beat ARRG by 66 in April. Two late season losses against solid squads (Kansas City and Bay Area) doesn’t hurt the chances of this dangerous team.

(5) Brew City (7-3) A sleeper pick. Impressive wins over North Star and ARRG netted them a good seed. The #4 vs. #5 match-up with Cincinnati is about as even as it gets. Winner makes the semifinals automatically.

(6) North Star (5-3) Tough draw against the Mad Rollin’ Dolls in round one. Almost upended by ARRG three weeks ago. Winner of the North Star/Madison match-up also makes it immediately into the final four.

(7) Minnesota (4-1) Minneapolis’ other derby franchise almost lost two close bouts against lower-ranked teams in 2010, a 2-point nailbiter over Tampa Bay and a 5-point donnybrook over Providence at the East Coast Derby Extravaganza in July. Yet, mid-season skater acquisitions from other powerhouses (Jet City and Dairyland) make this team a very dangerous #7.

(10) Omaha (5-1) Key wins over North Central rivals Ohio and Grand Raggidy at the Midwest Brewhaha in May give the Nebraskans its first post-season berth. Faces Minnesota in opening round.

It’s a very talented selection of teams - each of them contains impressive resumes.

But once again, it’s the post-season - everyone enters the tourney with a record of 0-0.

An opening victory against Naptown pushes ARRG in the right direction in the post-season…and continues a journey that every athlete who laces up a pair of quads wants to travel.

As a columnist, I strive to be impartial…but in this case, I’m an ARRG fan.

Kick a** in Green Bay this weekend, ladies.

FOLLOW ARRG’S JOURNEY TO GREEN BAY WITH LIVE VIDEOCAST COVERAGE FROM DERBY NEWS NETWORK. See the complete three-day tournament HERE!

The Grand Poobah and Hells LaBelle are bout announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news, information and unabashed homerism.

by The Grand Poobah

(PART ONE OF TWO)

For the best on quads from the Gateway City, it’s been a long, long wait.

After eight hard months of preparation and competition, the post-season push is on for the ARRG All-Stars (5-9) as it prepares for the upcoming Women’s Flat Track Derby Association National Tournament.

The locals face the Naptown Tornado Sirens of Indianapolis in the first round of the North Central Regional - dubbed “Thunda on the Tundra” - Friday, September 10 at the Brown County Arena in Green Bay, WI. The complete bracket can be found HERE.

Nationally, four separate WFTDA regionals are held, each featuring the top ten teams seeded and invited by the association. In short, forty WFTDA-sanctioned teams begin the playoff journey nationally.

The top three finishers in each respective regional advance to the WFTDA Championship Tournament held in November in Chicago, IL.

The early Friday match-up in the North Central regional playoff features two franchises familiar with each other. The eighth-seeded Missourians skated into Indy in March 2009 and rolled away with a 30-point victory.

The uphill journey to face ninth-seeded Naptown (8-3 in 2010 and a playoff first-timer) has been an exhausting one.  The season - filled with peaks and valleys - featured battles against some of the best in the North Central and beyond.

The first of this two-part series recaps the whirlwind 2010 season of the ARRG All-Stars, while next week’s entry looks at the future of this scrappy team, one that could turn heads at the upcoming North Central regional.

First to recap, a synopsis of the 2010 regular season for the ARRG All-Stars:

February 13: ARRG 172 Memphis 92

The travel team season started for ARRG in dominating fashion as the locals outscored the Hustlin’ Rollers 108-32 in the second half to pick up an opening win. The road victory proved that ARRG was a team that was primed to take on all comers. 2010 league scoring champion Starry Starry Fight topped ARRG with 51 points.

February 20: Brew City 120 ARRG 65

In its first 2010 action at home, ARRG was upended by a much improved Milwaukee squad. Brew City was able to throw off the ARRG blueprint by holding high scoring jammer Artemischief to a dozen points.  Bruiser jammer High D. Voltage collected 55 points in the victory for Milwaukee. Enya Nightmare paced ARRG with 23 points.

March 7: ARRG 139 Chicago Outfit 110

This “closed to the public bout” held in St. Louis featured a 92-43 lead for the locals at the half en route to its second win. Starry Starry Fight finished with 41 points while four ARRG skaters would net over twenty points apiece.

March 13: Atlanta 116 ARRG 79

The Dirty South Derby Girls extended its early 2010 undefeated streak to four bouts with the 37-point win. DSDG took a 67-31 lead into intermission and never looked back. South City Shiner picked up the MVP for ARRG, who dropped to 2-2 with the loss.

April 17: Cincinnati 134 ARRG 68

ARRG played in front of its largest crowd in franchise history - 3,100 at the historic Cincinnati Gardens. Unfortunately, it was against one of the best squads in Black Sheep history as Cincinnati raced out to a 90-17 halftime lead. ARRG would outscore Cincy 51-49 in the second half but the intermission deficit was too much to overcome. ARRG All-Star call-up Black Market Baby would pace the locals with 20 points.

May 1: Nashville 115 ARRG 82

Another road trip against another Midwestern powerhouse. And this one was a knock down, drag out, pier-six brawl throughout. ARRG posted a 72-70 lead midway through the second half. Music City’s best would then go on an unstoppable roll - outscoring St. Louis 45-10 down the stretch to hand ARRG its third loss in a row. Nashville’s Rambo Sambo scored an eye-popping 67 points while Artemischief posted 25 for ARRG.

May 22, Midwest Brewhaha: ARRG 115 Tampa Bay 110

Heading into the two-day Wisconsin invitational with a 2-4 record, ARRG needed a “pick us up.” It got what it was looking for in its win against the Tantrums. However, it didn’t come easy. Tampa Bay erased a 36-point lead in the second half to send the bout into a situation where the “winner takes all” with the bout’s final jam. South City Shiner sealed the five-point win by obtaining lead jammer status and quickly called off the jam. Artemischief scored 42 for ARRG, who picked up its third victory of the season.

May 22, Midwest Brewhaha: Jet City 162 ARRG 108

This would be the bout that ARRG wished it had a mulligan for. The locals raced out to a 78-42 halftime lead. And all seemed well in ARRG Nation, until Seattle’s best stopped the locals in its squads as the Bombers went on a 66-8 run in nine minutes. Jet City would go on to outscore ARRG 120-30 in the second half to pick up the win. Artemischief scored 51 to lead ARRG.

May 23, Midwest Brewhaha: ARRG 161 Burning River 57

A major rebound for ARRG occurred in day two of the Brewhaha. Still agitated from the Jet City letdown, the locals roughed up the North Central counterpart, holding them scoreless for a 22-minute stretch. ARRG would head into intermission with a 76-23 lead at the half. Remembering the huge leads lost in the earlier Tampa Bay and Jet City match-ups, ARRG remained aggressive in the second half, outscoring Burning River 104-34 to pick up two wins at the Brewhaha. Black Market Baby scored 49 points for ARRG, who headed into June with a 4-5 record.

June 5: ARRG 127 Duke City 75

Capitalizing on the experience of Brewhaha served the locals well, as ARRG dominated Albuquerque- ranked sixth in the West Regional - at the All-American Sports Mall. The locals outscored the Munecas Muertas 78-34 in the second half to even their 2010 record at 5-5. Artemischief scored 48 points in the ARRG victory.

August 14, ARRGageddon: Philly 156 ARRG 53

The opener to St. Louis’ first-ever derby invitational saw one of the best visiting squads to ever step onto the All-American Sports Mall surface. The Liberty Belles - ranked second in the East - barreled its way to a 90-32 halftime lead en route to a 103-point victory. Five Philly skaters scored over twenty points apiece while Artemischief topped the locals with 27 points.

August 14, ARRGageddon: Detroit 195 ARRG 65

Later that night, ARRG found itself against another high-octane opponent in Detroit, the second ranked team in the North Central. The Motor City cruised to an 88-33 lead at the half and never looked back. Artemischief scored 39 for ARRG, who was handed its seventh loss of the season.

August 15, ARRGageddon: Kansas City 135 ARRG 95

The invitational closer featured ejections and dejection. The highly-emotional I-70 battle saw ARRG down 80-60 at the halftime break, but the Roller Warriors played a high-impact second half to extend the lead to fifty. The 40-point loss resulted in a winless ARRGageddon for St. Louis. Artemischief paced ARRG with 46 points.

August 21: North Star 80 ARRG 75

One week later, the All-Stars travelled to Minneapolis to challenge the North Central’s sixth-seeded team. In another donnybrook, both teams traded leads in the second half. Faced with a “penultimate jam” scenario, the Supernovas gained the advantage and ARRG saw itself finish August winless with the five point loss.

FINAL 2010 REGULAR SEASON RECORD: 5-9

Although the record may not be the one desired…keep this in mind.

The caliber of competition that ARRG faced this travel season was unprecedented. The nine teams that ARRG fell to in 2010 had a combined record of 68-22….a winning percentage of 75%.

Of the 14 teams ARRG played this season, 12 have made the post-season,invitation-only WFTDA regionals.

By comparison, of the 11 teams Naptown faced this season, only two (Detroit and Memphis) have made the playoffs.

But all those stats are now wiped clean from the slate. It’s a new season…a post-season.

And ARRG looks to become one of “the derby dozen” that looks to make the November trek to the Windy City.

NEXT MONDAY IN THE ARRG NEWSCENTER: PART TWO - ARRG vs. Naptown. How the locals shape up, how the opposition stacks up and how the rest of the regional bracket looks. We’ll preview ARRG’s journey to “Thunda on the Tundra.”

The Grand Poobah and Hells LaBelle are bout announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG News and Information.

by the Grand Poobah

(LAKEVILLE, MN) In a battle of WFTDA North Central rivals Saturday night, the ARRG All-Stars dropped an 80-75 decision to the North Star Supernovas at Hasse Arena.

With the loss, ARRG finishes its regular travel season with a record of 5-9. ARRG now gears up for the post-season as the locals - seeded eighth in the North Central regional playoffs - face ninth-seeded Naptown (Indianapolis) in the first round on Friday, September 10 in Green Bay, WI.

North Star finishes its regular season with a record of 5-3. The sixth seed at “Thunda on the Tundra” faces the Mad Rollin’ Dolls of Madison, WI.

ANNUAL ARRG CAR WASH THIS SATURDAY

If you’re like me, one of the things that you despise doing is hand-washing your vehicle.

And let’s face it…taking the wheels through a car wash sometimes just doesn’t do the trick.

This weekend, ARRG gives you the chance to put a shine on your ride.

The Arch Rival Roller Girls will hold their annual car wash this Saturday, August 28, from noon until 6 pm at the Venice Café (1903 Pestalozzi, St. Louis, MO).

This event - through your kind donations - supports ARRG and its activities.

Visualize it - St. Louis’ sexiest athletes…in bikinis…and fishnets…with soapy suds…and sponges….

Nuff’ said - we’ll see you Saturday at the Venice Café!

GATEKEEPERS ROLL TO VICTORY

The STL Gatekeepers - the men’s local flat track derby franchise - picked up a 143-93 victory over the Twin City Terrors of Minneapolis Saturday night in Lakeville, MN.

The Gatekeepers - continuing its inaugural season - is still recruiting skaters, officials and volunteers to participate in the league. Find out more HERE.

TWIN CITY UPENDS ST. CHUX

(ST. PETERS, MO) In other local action over the weekend, the Twin City Derby Girls of Champaign/Urbana defeated the St. Chux Derby Chix of St. Charles County 111-88 at the Omni Sportsplex Saturday night.

TCDG - in its inaugural season - raced out to 62-53 lead at the half, thanks in part to jammer Houchebag’s 47 first-half points.

The “taste” of Champaign would outscore SCDC 49-35 in the second half to pick up the win and remain undefeated.

Houchebag paced TCDG with 74 points while Godbee With Ya contributed 22.

Jammer P. Diamond scored all 35 second-half points for SCDC and finished with 52 overall. Lady Lucifer notched 22 points while Grey Goose O’ Flyen added 10.

The St. Chux Derby Chix will next host a doubleheader on Saturday, September 18 at the Omni Sportsplex. SCDC will face the COMO Derby Dames’ B-squad while the Arch Rival Roller Girls’ St. Lunachix face COMO’s primary squad.

The Grand Poobah and Hells LaBelle are bout announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news, information…and soap suds.

by The Grand Poobah (Statistical information provided by Hells LaBelle and Smarty McFly)

(ST. LOUIS, MO) This past weekend’s inaugural ARRGageddon Invitational featured four WFTDA teams that are poised to make an impact in the upcoming post-season in their respective regionals.

When the dust had finally settled after six high-impact bouts held in the span of 20 hours, Philadelphia proved to all in attendance that they are one team to be reckoned with come September.

The Liberty Belles - seeded second in the extremely tough East Regional - finished ARRGageddon with a 3-0 record, posting impressive wins over Detroit, Kansas City and the host Arch Rival Roller Girls.

Philly outscored its opponents 425-197 over the weekend and with the sweep improved its record to 10-3.

The Detroit Derby Girls, seeded second in the North Central Regional, took two wins at ARRGageddon - solid showings over Kansas City and ARRG - to improve to 9-2.

The Kansas City Roller Warriors‘ lone win over the weekend - a hard-fought victory over St. Louis in ARRGageddon’s finale on Sunday - was a bright spot in a 1-2 finish for Fountain City’s best. After the weekend, the team seeded third in the South Central Regional head into the post-season with a 4-4 record.

The Arch Rival Roller Girl All-Stars, the North Central Regional’s eighth seed, who on paper was an underdog going into the invitational against legacy teams with superior firepower, finished winless yet proved to all three teams - and the derby community - that they are a very dangerous team heading into the post-season run.

When concluded, all in attendance - and those within the derby community - would wholeheartedly agree that this weekend was a perfect primer for all the squads, who will use the weekend to strategize the perfect plan to potentially charge into the WFTDA Championships in Chicago in October.

ARRGAGEDDON SATURDAY

PHILLY LIBERTY BELLES 156    ARRG ALL-STARS 53

ARRGageddon’s opener featured a visiting team that was projected by this columnist last week to be “the best team ever to step quad onto the flat track at the All-American.” As advertised, it did not take long for the skaters from the “City of Sisterly Love” to bring that prediction to fruition.

The Liberty Belles went on a 24-0 run midway through the first half, thanks to a 15-pointer notched by Philly sparkplug Mo Pain immediately followed by a 9-pointer from veteran jammer Gloria Grindem, to pull out to a 47-14 lead.

Following a four-pointer by ARRG’s Enya Nightmare, the Liberty Belles went on a 29-0 barrage, which featured a 13-point jam by Elle Viento followed by a 12-pointer by Mercedes Bends.

At the halftime break, Philly posted a 90-32 lead.

Philly kept the pressure going in the second half. Bends would score another triple grand slam midway through the period en route to a 62-21 second-half showing by the Liberty Belles - and inevitably the 103-point margin of victory.

Philly was propelled by seven different skaters in the scoring column - five who scored at least twenty points. Jammers Pain and Teflon Donna paced the Liberty Belles with 30 points apiece while Bends added 28.

ARRG was lead in scoring by Artemischief’s 27 points while Nightmare added 12.

PHILLY LIBERTY BELLES 149    K.C. ROLLER WARRIORS 55

Despite playing back-to-back bouts, Philly was ready to pull out a trump card in ARRGageddon’s bout two - and in the process throw a little misfortune towards Kansas City.

Both teams battled early as both teams exchanged leads. KCRW sported a 19-17 lead twelve minutes into the first half.

Then Philly sent jammer Miss Fortune - sight unseen in the earlier bout against ARRG - to the line. She made the most of opportunity - scoring 25 points to give the Liberty Belles a 42-19 lead.

Philly would continue its “jammer by committee” to stretch out to an 80-35 lead at the half.

And when one thought that the fatigue factor of playing two bouts straight would affect the Liberty Belles, Philadelphia would continue to punish KC in the second half. Teflon Donna would post a 14-point jam early in the second half to pace the Belles, who would go on to outscore the Roller Warriors 69-20 in the second half to pick up the win.

Viento would score 40 points to pace Philly in the victory, followed by Persephone’s 35-point tally and Fortune’s 30-point contribution.

Kansas City was paced by Track Rat’s 28 points, followed by Dementia’s 17.

DETROIT DERBY GIRLS 195    ARRG ALL-STARS 65

Saturday evening’s finale at ARRGageddon featured rivals in the North Central Region, and an early first-half explosion propelled Motor City’s finest to victory.

Following an early 3-pointer by ARRG’s Artemischief, Detroit - chomping at the bit with its first game of the invitational - would upend the locals with back-to-back mega jams. DDG MVP Racer McChaseHer would notch a 23-pointer followed by 19-pointer by Effin Money to pull out to a 45-3 lead.

ARRG would find themselves behind the 8-ball for the remainder of the half - which saw Detroit with an 88-33 lead at intermission.

A barrage of scoring in the second half - including multi-point jams by McChaseHer and Money - would allow Detroit to outscore ARRG 107-32 in the second half to give Detroit the lopsided win.

Racer McChaser would have a career night for Detroit - scoring an invitational best of 65 points - followed by Money’s 55.

Artemischief would lead ARRG in scoring with 39 points, followed by Black Market Baby’s nine.

ARGGAGEDDON SUNDAY

PHILLY LIBERTY BELLES 120   DETROIT DERBY GIRLS 89

In Sunday morning’s opening tilt, Detroit looked to avenge a 60-point setback earlier this season against the Liberty Belles. Unfortunately, the rematch at ARRGageddon - albeit closer - netted the same result in the record column.

Mo Pain’s opening jam netted Philly a 12-1 lead. The Liberty Belles would then go on a 17-0 stretch later in the half to pull out to a 33-11 lead.

Detroit, however, would refuse to throw in the towel. DDG would whittle away at any Philly advantage as the half progressed, pulling to within 14 points deep in the first half.

The Liberty Belles would go back to its lynchpin, Teflon Donna, to pull ahead for the remainder of the half. Donna’s 9-pointer with 5:00 remaining followed by another 9-pointer at the end of the half resulted in a 70-34 lead for Philly at intermission.

Play was pretty much even in the second half. In fact, Detroit outscored Philly 55-50 in the second frame. Yet, the halftime lead was insurmountable for Motor City, who dropped a 31-point loss in the conclusion of the Liberty Belle trifecta.

Philadelphia was paced by Mo Pain’s 25 points, followed by Persephone’s 23.

Teflon Donna topped the scoring for Detroit with 36 points, followed by Racer McChaeHer’s 34.

DETROIT DERBY GIRLS 138    K.C. ROLLER WARRIORS 109

In what would become ARRGageddon’s most competitive match-up, a pair of legacy teams brawled to a 1-point differential at the end of the first half. Kansas City sported a 58-57 lead at intermission.

KCRW would grab the first six points of the second half until Detroit’s Racer McChaseHer scored an eight-pointer to give Detroit a 65-64 lead.

Leads would be flip-flopped as the half progressed. Detroit posted a 78-77 with 18:00 left.

Detroit would then go a 22-7 run to pull out to a 100-84 lead six minutes later. DDG Jammer Sister Slit’chya would net a 15-point mega jam with 7:00 remaining to extend the lead to 119-87.

DDG would go on to outscore KC 74-52 to pick up its second win at ARRGageddon.

KANSAS CITY ROLLER WARRIORS 135   ARRG ALL-STARS 95

In the final bout of ARRGageddon, two teams who had not tasted victory yet during the weekend put on one of the most hard-hitting, dramatic bouts ever held at the All-American.

ARRG drew first blood as Artemischief scored a bout-opening seven-pointer to give the locals a 7-0 lead.

KCRW would answer with back-to-back lead jams by Jade Lightning and Bella Fire. The three-pointer and nine-pointer respectively gave the I-70 counterpart a 12-7 lead five minutes in.

Both teams did their best to outmuscle each other as the half progressed. But at the 18:00 mark, KC’s Fire lit the All-American on fire with a 15-point tally - which gave the Roller Warriors a 45-15 edge.

Kansas City would stretch out to a 67-19 lead approaching the final third of the first half…and all seemed hopeless for ARRG.

But then something happened - as things often do in derby - that shifted momentum.

ARRG would go on a 41-13 run to finish the final ten minutes of the half. Artemischief would post a nine-pointer deep to pull ARRG within 20 at the half, which saw KC sport an 80-60 edge at intermission.

Both teams would trade points as the second half started, until KC started to “feel it,” as the Roller Warriors would go on a 45-19 sprint at the 10:00 mark. Bellafire and Ruth Canal’s 8-pointers would extend Kansas City’s lead to 125-75.

Kansas City down the stretch - and much to its credit - decided to use the clock to its advantage as the half progressed. By slowing down the pace and using lead jammer status to chew up clock time, KC would maintain its overwhelming lead. With the Roller Warriors utilizing clock management, ARRG would see few opportunities to score.

It might have not been pretty to the ARRG contingent, but one would have to agree that it was effective for Kansas City.

Even though ARRG outscored KC in the bout’s latter stages, the large lead was too much for the locals to upend.

KCRW would outscore ARRG 55-35 to pick up its lone victory at ARRGageddon, and finish its regular travel team season record at 4-4.

Kansas City was paced by Belle Fire’s 38 points followed by Ruth Canal’s 35.

ARRG - whose record dropped to 5-8 following ARRGageddon - was led by Artemischief’s 46 points followed by Enya Nightmare’s 24.

NOTES FROM THE POOBAH

Truth be told, the Arch Rival Roller Girls - in its five years of existence - have never created and implemented an event like this before. Although the league has hosted travel team bouts in the past, this was the first time that the league had attempted an invitational that spanned numerous bouts on consecutive days.

That being said, one would have to agree that this inaugural event was a shining moment for the league.

On behalf of the Arch Rival Roller Girls, I’d like to thank all of those who participated, volunteered and watched this first-time event. Without your help and support, none of this would have been possible.

ARRG would like to thank the Philly Liberty Belles, the Detroit Derby Girls and the Kansas City Roller Warriors for their participation in this event. Your professionalism throughout the weekend - albeit in the warm confines of the All-American - was very much appreciated. All three squads are solid representatives of the WFTDA and we wish the best of luck to all three in their future endeavors at the upcoming WFTDA regionals.

I’d also like to acknowledge the officials - skating and non-skating - who participated at ARRGageddon. These hard-working, derby-lovin’ professionals volunteer their time to oversee and regulate the action on and off the track. They never receive enough credit - your participation is very much appreciated.

ARRG would like to thank the sponsors of ARRGageddon and for their support over the weekend: Mamacita’s, CheapTRX, Pabst Blue Ribbon, Aries, Lockton, Onesto’s Pizza, Qdoba, Nadine’s , Rockstar Skates, Cupcake Britt, Richard Roberts Jewelry, Dirty Derby, TOKY, the Zombie Squad, Petra Café and Hookah Lounge, Tripp Company, Kodama Akido, Abbie Takes Pictures, Clear High Speed Broadband, Dead Girl Designs, The Rock, Hip Check Designs, Sinners, Chiro and Muts-n-Stuff. If you could do a favor for ARRG Nation, when you visit these businesses in the future, let them know that you appreciate their support of the Arch Rival Roller Girls.

ARRG would also like to thank the local media outlets who gave exposure to this event, including KTVI-TV, The Riverfront Times and 106.5 FM the Arch. Your continued support is greatly appreciated.

As a personal note, Hells LaBelle and I would like to thank the visiting announcers who provided commentary to ARRGageddon: D’Nouncer Duane from KCRW, Big Poppa Razzi from DDG and Mizz Communication, who travelled all the way from Colorado to call the action for Philly. Your professionalism is greatly appreciated and best to luck to all your teams in the future.

As a whole, it turned out to be a very rewarding experience for the St. Louis derby fan! Once again, we thank you for your patronage and support on a very monumental weekend!

ARRG ALL-STARS BATTLE NORTH STAR THIS SATURDAY

PRE-REGIONAL SHOWDOWN PITS NORTH CENTRAL RIVALS

A primer for ARRG’s post-season push in the upcoming WFTDA North Central Regional takes place this Saturday as the ARRG All-Stars travel to Minneapolis to face the North Star Supernovas at the Lakeville Hasse Arena.

The WFTDA-sanctioned bout will be part of a historic night for Minnesota derby as this will be the state’s first-ever intergender co-hosted event. Prior to the women’s bout, the STL Gatekeepers - St. Louis men’s roller derby franchise - battle the Twin City Terrors.

The ARRG/North Star match-up provides plenty of intrigue, as both could potentially meet each other in post-season play. ARRG - seeded eighth in the regional - faces the team ranked two spots higher.

ARRG remembers the Supernovas well. They met at the North Central Regional last year, where Minnesota’s best posted an 85-43 victory.

North Star (4-3) has travelled a similar journey as ARRG in 2010. By competing nationally against top WFTDA squads, the Supernovas might not have the record they had wished for. Nonetheless, the on-track experience has resulted in nothing but positives for this aggressive team.

The Supernovas return to the track following a 148-68 loss to the Brewcity Bruisers in mid-July. In June, the squad won both of its bouts at the East Coast Derby Extravaganza - a 99-70 win over Carolina and an impressive 105-69 victory over Nashville.

Four-year vet MEDUSA is the one jammer to watch for North Star. She contains explosive quickness and rarely makes mistakes. Jammer Jawbreaker has had a very successful scoring season in only her second year of play. North Star’s 2008 and 2009 MVP Jammer winner Katarina Hitt also provides plenty of excitement. Plus, there’s additional scoring punch from the wonderfully-named Marshmallow Assassin.

This is projected to be the biggest derby crowd in Minnesota state history - hence the change to a larger venue. A statement would be made if the Gateway City’s best - female and male - could go 2-0 in the “City of Lakes” this Saturday night!

ARRG TO APPEAR AT DOWNTOWN STREET FEST FRIDAY!

Those unable to make the trip to the “Mill City” can still see the Arch Rival Roller Girls this weekend as ARRG will make an appearance at the 2^nd Annual Midtown Alley Street Fest, set for this Friday in St. Louis.

The Midtown Alley Street Fest features free live music from six area bands as well as great food from nine midtown restaurants. (Poobah note: In fairness, I’m not going to pimp any one band or restaurant over the other because - quite honestly - they’re all pretty good!)

The event takes place on Friday, August 20 from 4-11pm in the 3000 block of Locust in midtown St. Louis.

ARRG skaters are schedule to ask “St. Louis-based” trivia questions to street fest patrons…questions that could net prizes.

For more information about the Midtown Alley Street Fest, check out their website RIGHT HERE!

MORE LOCAL DERBY ACTION THIS WEEKEND!

There’s even flat-track action to catch this weekend in the area - featuring two teams that have a close association with ARRG.

This Saturday, the St. Chux Derby Chix from St. Charles face the Twin City Derby Girls of Champaign/Urbana this Saturday at the Omni Sports Complex (4160 Ehlman Drive, St. Charles, MO). Doors open at 7 pm. Bout time is 8 pm. Tickets for this event are $10 each, but you can save $3 by ordering online at Brown Derby Tickets.

The St. Chux Derby Chix - competing in its inaugural season - battled the Arch Rival Roller Girl Rookies earlier this summer and were impressive in its showing. The Twin City Derby Girls have already sold out its bouts on home turf in its inaugural season.

Both squads have assisted ARRG at their home bouts this season, have participated in practices with ARRG skaters and - most importantly - have effectively built the sport from the grass roots level in a short amount of time.

There’s a lot at stake for these up-and-coming franchises. Without a doubt, this will be a highly-competitive bout. ARRG encourages you to attend!

 The Grand Poobah and Hells LaBelle are bout announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this area on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news/information.

by the Grand Poobah

(ST. LOUIS, MO) This coming weekend, the local flavor of flat-track roller derby reaches unprecedented heights as four nationally-recognized all-star teams compete in a two-day invitational in St. Louis.

And when all is said and done, one team will be considered the “queens of the mountain.”

The Arch Rival Roller Girls host the inaugural ARRGageddon Invitational - this Saturday and Sunday at the All-American Sports Mall (11133 Lindbergh Business Ct., St. Louis, MO). 

Click The Image To Find Out More About This Inaugural Event!

Alongside the ARRG All-Stars, travel teams from Philadelphia, Detroit and Kansas City will compete in WFTDA-sanctioned action during the two-day, six-bout invitational.

Here is the rundown for ARRGageddon:

SATURDAY, AUGUST 14

6:30 PM - ARRG All-Stars vs. Philly Liberty Belles

7:55 PM - Philly Liberty Belles vs. Kansas City Roller Warriors

9:15 PM - Detroit Derby Girls vs. ARRG All-Stars

SUNDAY, AUGUST 15

11:00 AM - Detroit Derby Girls vs. Philly Liberty Belles

12:20 PM - Kansas City Roller Warriors vs. Detroit Derby Girls

1:40 PM - ARRG All-Stars vs. Kansas City Roller Warriors

Doors for each session will open 30 minutes prior to the first bout.

Tickets for ARRGageddon are $15 for each day, or for even a better derby deal, buy a two-day pass for $25. Online tickets are still available this week at Brown Paper Tickets or at the door on bout days.

All four teams competing at ARRGageddon have already earned post-season berths in their respective WFTDA regional tournaments next month, so this weekend could possibly provide a fair barometer for the squads by skating in three highly competitive bouts within a 17-hour time span.

St. Louis’ best on quads, seeded eighth in the North Central regional, returns to the track since a 127-75 win over Duke City (Albuquerque) on June 5.

ARRG (5-5) has won three of its last four bouts. In the process, the team has developed into a well-oiled machine, outscoring its opponents 501-399.

Artemischief

Perennial all-star jammer Artemischief paces ARRG offensively. Her 258 points scored in eight 2010 WFTDA bouts includes a 51-point performance against Duke City. Jammers South City Shiner (244 points) and Enya Nightmare (195 points) have had personal-best seasons as well as mid-season call-up Black Market Baby (152 points), who scored a career-best 54 points against Burning River in May.

Complimenting the “fab four” are an experienced set of blockers, including multiple-MVP winner Eli Wallop, Grave Danger, Downtown Dallis, Morgan LeFaetal, Punches Pileup, Davey Blockit, and mid-season Buckeye State transplant Chewblocka.

Controlling the pace for the ARRG All-Stars are veteran pivots Mayor Francis Slayer and The Educator.

The weekend will be a true test for the locals, as they battle three squads who have high seeds in their respective post-season tourneys.

PHILLY LIBERTY BELLES

This arguably could be the most impressive squad ever to step quad into the All-American Sports Mall.

Seeded second in the extremely tough East Regional bracket of the WFTDA tourney, Philly sports a 7-3 record heading into ARRGageddon.

In July, the Liberty Belles thumped Steel City 161-63.

The month prior, Philly swept all three of its bouts at the East Coast Derby Extravaganza - a 119-106 win over Western powerhouse Denver, a 110-89 victory over North Central top seed Windy City and a 203-98 thumping over San Francisco’s Bay Area Derby Girls.

Shenita Stretcher, Gloria Grindem, Elle Viento, and Persephone contribute to Philly’s solid jammer rotation.

Saturday’s ARRGageddon opener will be the first-ever meeting between ARRG and the Liberty Belles.

DETROIT DERBY GIRLS

This will be the first action in eight weeks for the Motor City powerhouse, currently seeded second in the WFTDA North Central regional tourney.

In June, Detroit (7-1) steamrolled over North Central Rival Grand Raggidy 230-37. Three weeks later, the squad continued their undefeated month with back-to-back wins over Madison’s Dairyland Dolls (139-114) and Milwaukee’s Brewcity Bruisers (195-47).

Detroit looks to avenge a 129-69 loss to Philly in May.

Captain Racer McChaseHer, the league’s 2010 MVP, leads the charge for DDG. Jammer of the Year Sista Slit’chya carries the bulk load of the offense, while blockers Cookie Rumble and Fatal Femme lay down the foundation up front.

In January 2009, ARRG travelled to Detroit and were handed a 153-91 loss.

KANSAS CITY ROLLER WARRIORS

The 2007 WFTDA National Champions head into ARRGageddon with a 3-2 record, a very misleading record at that.

The North Central regional tourney’s third-seeded team is the winner of two straight: a 201-104 win over the DC Rollergirls in June and 352-25 win over Northwest Arkansas last month.

Yep, you read that right….352-25….in one bout.

All-Star Kelley Young (a.k.a. Snot Rocket) recently rejoined the league after a two year sabbatical and made an immediate splash, posting 56 points against Charm City in her return bout.

Bella Fire, Ruth Canal, Dominant Jean, and Hall Balls contribute to the jamming rotation for Kansas City.

KCRW last visited the All-American Sports Mall on March 7, 2009 and posted a 89-80 win over ARRG.

No doubt, this weekend should provide plenty of top-notch excitement for the fans, as all four teams expect the momentum of the weekend to carry over into the post-season.

Four teams arrive…which one will survive? We’ll see you trackside!

(Editorial Note: ARRG’s 5-5 record includes a 139-110 win over the Chicago Outfit, a closed-to-the-public bout held on March 7 in St. Louis. As this was a private bout, it was not reported here at the website earlier this season. However, the bout was considered a regulation bout, thus, it is now included in ARRG’s overall record…or at least in the articles I write.)

ADDED 8/10/10: ARRG is proud to announce that St. Louis’ own Steve Ewing will sing the National Anthem at Saturday night’s session. Ewing was the golden voice of  nationally-renowned rock/ska/reggae group The Urge, who nationally toured in the 1990’s with artists such as 311, Korn and Incubus. With alternative favorites such as  “Jump Right In” and “Too Much Stereo” in his portfolio, Ewing continues to entertain audiences today with his latest release “Zodiac”. Find out more about Steve Ewing RIGHT HERE!

Unable to make ARRGageddon? Keep up to date on all six bouts with ARRG’s Smarty McFly and others with LIVE textcast coverage on the Derby News Network. Click HERE for LIVE coverage.

The Grand Poobah and Hells LaBelle are bout announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section next Monday for a recap of ARRGageddon…you know, the two-day event you’re attending this weekend…..

by the Grand Poobah

(ST. LOUIS) It was inevitable - the league was bursting at the seams.

The interest in roller derby the last few years - both nationally and in the St. Louis area - has generated unprecedented growth in the sport.  Not only in terms of attendance, but also in the number of athletes - both traditional and non-traditional - who elect to “lace the quads” and participate in the sport.

Locally, the Arch Rival Roller Girls saw one of its largest recruitment classes ever in 2010. Skaters of various disciplines wanted to engage in the high-impact athleticism of flat track roller derby.

Add this list to the pre-existing list of non-rostered skaters - those without an official team - who were already participating in practices and volunteering at events. The end result was a large group of skaters who desired to one day skate full-time with an ARRG intraleague franchise.

Sounds like a good problem to have, right? Well, not quite.

More and more rookies and recruits in the mix meant that fewer skaters had a chance to make the roster for a league that only had three intraleague franchises, each containing approximately 15 skaters.

Even with the retirement of ARRG skaters - only four this season - openings were at a premium.

In short, ARRG had a lot of skaters participating who didn’t have a “home.”

And for a league that prides itself on “acceptance,” to unfortunately deny hard-working athletes an opportunity to compete due to a lack of roster openings was contradictory to its mission: to help the league - and the sport - grow.

To its credit, as the league saw the numbers of participants grow, it realized that it had to grow as well.

A major step was recently taken by ARRG to set the long-term plan into motion - not only to provide an opportunity for the stars of tomorrow a platform to shine, but to also continue the development of the league as the decade progresses.

The Arch Rival Roller Girls are proud to officially announce the formation of a fourth ARRG intraleague team. The new team - to be officially named in the Fall - will join the Stunt Devils, the Smashinistas and the M-80s in intraleague action beginning next season.

Unlike other sports - where expansion teams often contain a roster of “unknowns” who do not have the depth to compete against established squads - the new ARRG franchise will consist primarily of derby veterans, some with All-Star and travel team experience.

The remainder of the expansion team’s roster will consist of recently-transplanted derby veterans and unrostered rookies who were selected in a supplemental draft last week in St. Louis.

This exciting news is expected to alleviate the “growing pains” experienced by the league - and to more importantly set the template into place for future growth.

HOW THE PROCESS WORKED

Earlier this season, an informal poll was conducted amongst the league to see if there was enough interest to expand to a fourth intraleague team. Overwhelmingly, the results favorably showed interest.

In July, ARRG accepted submissions from rostered skaters - those on pre-existing ARRG teams - to join the expansion team. Once again, there was overwhelming support from the veterans, who found the excitement of creating and cultivating a new franchise a golden opportunity for league growth and development.

Once all names were submitted, the culmination of the roster’s core - as determined by the ARRG Board of Directors and its coaching committee - would take into consideration a skater’s tenure in the league and their experience of play. This would result in parity amongst the four teams and provide fairness for the three pre-existing teams who were potentially losing rostered skaters from their 2010 line-up.

On July 22, ARRG released the list of the first nine rostered players selected for the new franchise. Five days later, the fourth team’s roster was supplemented with a draft of non-rostered players.

When the dust had finally settled, ARRG realized it had made a step in the right direction.

Here is the roster for ARRG’s newest intraleague franchise…

Starry Starry Fight (Jammer - Acquired from the Stunt Devils) Returning back to the Gateway City, this high-octane skater gives the expansion team an immediate scoring presence. ARRG’s 2010 scoring champ posted 151 points in only three bouts. A two-year ARRG All-Star, Fight brings veteran skills (and a rested body) to the fold. An immediate, major impact player!

Smarty McFly (Jammer, Blocker - Acquired from the Stunt Devils) 2009’s ARRG Rookie of the Year is multi-dimensional, versatile at both jammer and pivot. Injuries took toll in 2010. Rested body and rejuvenated spirit in upcoming season will make this multifaceted skater huge threat to the opposition.

Nikki Vixxen (Jammer, Blocker - Acquired from the M-80s) Co-captain of former team should easily skate into a “mentor” position with expansion team. Veteran leadership is what this dual specialist brings to the table. When jamming, extremely effective. When blocking, even more so. Scored 20 points in January 2010 bout.

Chewblocka (Blocker - Acquired from the Stunt Devils) Recent transplant from the Buckeye State is a three-time Ohio Roller Girls’ Blocker of the Year. Made immediate splash by joining the ARRG All-Stars late in travel team season. New turf and new team brings huge upswing to portfolio.

Domme E. Nation (Blocker - Acquired from the Stunt Devils) 2010 ARRG All-Star has great track presence and powerful upper body strength. Very effective in educating younger players about the sport. Will be needed in the role with younger line-up.

SueShe (Pivot, Blocker - Acquired from the Smashinistas) Returning back to 100% in 2010, this aggressive ARRG vet spent plenty of track time in her primary position. Great conditioning. Easy money bet that she’s your starting pivot.

Bertha Venus (Blocker - Acquired from the Stunts Devils) ARRG vet gets chance to shine with new team. Former team’s depth at blocker position kept track activity low in 2010. Desire is there - opportunity awaits.

Ginny Beastly (Blocker - Acquired from the Smashinistas) Young blocker showed steady improvement as season progressed. More track time will give her valuable experience. Possible pivot candidate.

Rock Steady (Blocker - Acquired from the Smashinistas) 2010 mid-season call-up gets opportunity to break through with expansion team. Good size. Good conditioning.

Party Foul (Jammer, Blocker - Formerly of Bleeding Heartland Rollergirls) Fresh to the Show-Me State from Bloomington, IN, this two-year derby vet has picked up a lot of accolades in short time. Won “Veteran Blocker” award in her final year for the Flatliners. Fans voted her one of the finalists in jammer category. Solid acquisition.

Zo D. Ax (Jammer, Blocker - Formerly of Star City Rollergirls) Four-year vet from Roanoke, VA’s derby franchise is new to town. Considered a “stealth jammer” from former teammates. Will make immediate splash in Gateway City.

Kalestorm (Blocker, Jammer - Rookie Acquisition) Strong spring activity leads to immediate call-up to intraleague. According to insiders, has “dedicated 110% towards improvement.” Might be expansion team’s unsuspecting surprise. 

Badonka Bam (Blocker, Jammer - Rookie Acquisition) Impressed braintrust with effort at ARRG rookie bout vs. St. Chux Derby Chix. Willing to put body on the line for squad. Trains with ARRG All-Star travel team regularly.

As one can see, the lineup for this new expansion team features a wide variety of weapons. This team very well could compete for the top spot in ARRG next season.

Now onto a burning question: Now with a fourth team in the mix, what does this mean for ARRG future bouts at the All-American Sports Mall?

To be honest (and honesty is always the best policy), I’m not at liberty to offer that information at the moment.

Let’s just say that a new era of action for ARRG will be presented to the public in due time.

And I think…..no, I KNOW…..that you will enjoy it!

COMING NEXT MONDAY TO THE ARRG NEWSCENTER:

The Countdown to ARRGageddon is on! The two-day, six-bout invitational brings three nationally-ranked squads to the Gateway City. We’ll preview all the action for St. Louis’ biggest derbyfest ever!  

CLICK ON THE IMAGE TO FIND OUT MORE ABOUT THIS TWO-DAY, SIX BOUT INVITATIONAL IN ST. LOUIS AUGUST 14 & 15

The Grand Poobah and Hells LaBelle are bout announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this area on Mondays for latest in ARRG news and information.

by the Grand Poobah

(ST. LOUIS, MO) For the second consecutive year, St. Louis’ best on quads will prepare for a national post-season run.

The ARRG All-Stars have earned a bid to compete in the North Central Regional, held September 10-12 in Green Bay, WI.

The post-season, invitation-only regional is one of four held nationally by the Womens Flat Track Derby Association (WFTDA). The top three finishers at each regional advances to the WFTDA 2010 Championships, held November 5-7 in Chicago, IL.

The ARRG All-Stars, seeded eighth, will face the ninth-seeded Naptown All-Stars of Indianapolis in the North Central Regional opening round on Friday, September 10 at 10 AM.

The winner of that bout will face the top-seeded Windy City Rollers of Chicago later that day.

The North Central Regional - also known as “Thunda on the Tundra” - is hosted by the Brewcity Bruisers of Milwaukee, WI.

Post-season tournament berths were awarded to leagues based upon second quarter regional rankings by the WFTDA.

The WFTDA North Central Regional seedings are as follows:

1)      Windy City Rollers (Chicago)

2)      Detroit Derby Dolls

3)      Mad Rollin’ Dolls (Madison)

4)      Cincinnati Rollergirls

5)      Brewcity Bruisers (Milwaukee)

6)      North Star Roller Girls (Minnetonka, MN)

7)      Minnesota Rollergirls (Minneapolis/St. Paul)

8)      Arch Rival Roller Girls

9)      Naptown Rollergirls (Indianapolis)

10)   Omaha Rollergirls

Congratulations to ARRG for another trip into the post-season!

ARRG “GIVES BACK” TO ST. LOUIS!

COMMUNITY OUTREACH EFFORTS SHINE IN 2010

by The Grand Poobah

“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.” - Winston Churchill

A positive extension of any athletic franchise, regardless of size, is continuous outreach within the community that supports it.

Since the league’s inception in 2005, the Arch Rival Roller Girls have been active in “giving back” to the area that has supported them.

Whether it’s shaking cans, running or walking miles, giving blood or holding raffles, ARRG’s community outreach efforts have helped numerous area non-for-profits in 2010.

In the process, awareness has been raised in these organizations - and THAT’S always a good thing.

In short, ARRG doesn’t participate in community outreach because it feels like it has to do it. ARRG participates because IT WANTS TO DO IT!

A small synopsis of ARRG’s activities so far in 2010:

YOUTH IN NEED - $3,425.75 RAISED!

ARRG and its derby-lovin’ audience helped the St. Charles-based non-for-profit with raffle basket drawings at nine home bouts this season. ARRG athletes also visited a St. Louis branch of the organization early in the calendar year. Through a variety of crisis prevention and intervention programs, Youth In Need is dedicated to building positive futures for the community’s most vulnerable children, teens and families. For more information, visit www.youthinneed.org.

SUSAN G. KOMEN RACE FOR THE CURE - $1,595 RAISED!

In June, the skaters of ARRG participated in this annual event, which locally drew a record 71,802 participants downtown. The Komen St. Louis Affiliate works to better the lives of those facing breast cancer and addresses needs by funding breast health programs in their 17-county service area. Up to 75 percent of net proceeds generated by the Affiliate stays in the St. Louis area with the remaining income going to the national grants program. For more information, visit www.komenstlouis.org.

MAKE-A-WISH “WALK FOR WISHES” - $1,081 RAISED!

In February, ARRG participated in the fifth annual event, held at West County Shopping Center in Des Peres. The event raised over $76,000 for the Make-A-Wish Foundation of Missouri, which grants wishes to children with life-threatening medical conditions to enrich the human experience with hope, strength and joy. For more information, visit www.mo.wish.org.

HEAT UP ST. LOUIS - HARDEE’S RISE AND SHINE

In January, members of ARRG joined St. Louis Mayor Francis Slay, Fredbird from the St. Louis Cardinals and other local volunteers by serving as guest greeters at area Hardee’s. Heat Up St. Louis, a non-profit established in December 2000, focuses on helping the elderly and disabled, as well as low-income families, with their delinquent heating bills in the bi-state region. For more information, visit www.heatupstlouis.org.

ZOMBIE SQUAD RED CROSS BLOOD DRIVE

Members of ARRG participated in a “Zombie”-style blood drive and BBQ with the St. Louis chapter of the Zombie Squad, who serve as volunteer security at local ARRG bouts. Since its founding in 1881, the American Red Cross has been the nation’s premier emergency response organization. The St. Louis chapter of the American Red Cross was officially chartered in 1917. For more information, visit www.redcrossstl.org.

So far…so good…and it feels so right.

ARRG will continue its fundraising efforts next month at the two-day ARRGageddon Invitational, held Saturday & Sunday, August 14 & 15 at the All-American Sports Mall. Once again, ARRG will be selling raffle tickets for prize baskets, which contain ARRG merchandise, gift certificates to area businesses and other assorted goodies.

Proceeds from the raffle basket drawings with benefit the local chapter of Habitat for Humanity, which is dedicated to eliminating substandard housing in St. Louis. Since 1986, Habitat for Humanity has built over 250 homes in the St. Louis area.

Tickets for the raffle baskets are $1 apiece or 6 for $5 and are available at the front entrance of the All-American Sports Mall. ARRG members will also be selling tickets in the crowd on both days.

And the community efforts of ARRG in 2010 extend beyond raising donations and awareness.

In addition to the aforementioned fundraisers, ARRG has participated this year at Pridefest St. Louis, the St. Louis St. Patrick’s Day Parade, the St. Louis Car and Auto Show, the Sandrina’s Flag Day Luau and Macklin Days. Expect ARRG to be at more community events in the near future. We’ll keep you updated here at the ARRG Newscenter.

ARRG is all about giving back to the community, because ARRG is a part of the community. Thanks to ARRG Nation for helping us in our efforts!

You know you want to do it! Click on the graphic to find out more about this two-day, four team event, hosted by ARRG, to be held in St. Louis in three weeks!

The Grand Poohbear and Hella LaBella are bout announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news and information.

by The Grand Poobah, with assistance from Hells LaBelle. Photos by Bob Dunnell.

Take one quick minute and exhale. Just one quick minute.

Perhaps that’s all one gets, for there’s still plenty of work to do as 2010 progresses.

Don’t think for one minute that just because the intraleague season has concluded that things will slow down here in ARRG Nation. August will see the inaugural two-day ARRGageddon Invitational, while September begins the WFTDA post-season run for the ARRG All-Stars. Sprinkle in more bouts for the St. Lunachix - ARRG’s developmental team - and derby fans will have a busy remainder of the summer and the rest of the calendar year.

This also means that the work doesn’t end here in the ARRG Newscenter. We’ll continue to bring you new content every Monday here at the website. We appreciate all the feedback we have received to our bout previews, recaps and feature columns.

But we do get the opportunity to play a bit this week.

Every year at the conclusion of the season, ARRG has an official awards ceremony that recognizes the achievements of skaters and non-skaters within the league. The awards handed out that night not only highlight athletic performances but also the efforts that come with the operation and execution of the league.

And those official awards will be deservedly handed out to the skaters after total input from the league.

But before these are handed out, your ever-lovin’ bout announcers decided to perpetrate a few acknowledgements on their own.

And after a few moments of reflection, and after a few frosty beverages, the plan was put into place to give out some “unofficial” awards that reflect the ARRG intraleague action from 2KX.

So, for the first time ever, the ARRG Newscenter presents….THE MOLLYS! 

MOLLY!

First for the unknowing, a little background information. Molly - a pink paper-mache piñata in the form of a unicorn - is the official mascot of the derby-lovin’ fanatics who participate in tailgating prior to ARRG bouts. Since February 2008, she has been a permanent fixture of every ARRG event, including travel bouts.

She wears Mardi Gras beads, poses with pictures with the fans, often sports a bowtie and contains no candy.

She’s also weathered, consistently loses pieces of her body, tends to wander in the area of alcoholic beverages and falls down an awful lot.

In short, she’s perfect.

These “unofficial” awards were created and voted upon by a blue-ribbon panel of ten unbiased “judges” - they represent a group that is unaffiliated with ARRG, its Board of Directors, its sponsors, the WFTDA, the All-American Sports Mall, Miss Hackney’s Pre-K Class at Lil’ Tot Learning Academy in McLeansboro, IL and Mr. Joe Shablotnik, 1058 Habbersham, Fredricktown, MO.  (For complete panel representation, please see the disclaimer post-column).

And once again, these are not affiliated with the future awards to be officially presented by ARRG in 2010.

And so, without further ado, the inaugural presentation of “THE MOLLYS.”

OH S@!# PHOTOGRAPHIC MOMENT

February’s bout between the M80’s and the Smashinistas provided plenty of eye-popping moments. But the best illustration of this occurred as Siege went-a-tumbling. One would assume - judging from Bob Dunnell’s photo - that the returning M-80 would be unable to continue. Far from it - for the firecracker, it was just another night on the track. Equally loved by ninjas, punkrockdykes and straight girls, Siege’s return was one of the feelgood moments for derby hardcores in 2010. (And we beer drinkin’, meat eatin’, cigar smokin’ sluggos dig her too!)

BEST SKATER NAME

This category turned out to be a tough one for the panel to agree upon. LaBelle lobbied hard for Pelvis Costello while the Poobah filibustered for Munchausen by Foxy. But in the end, the committee agreed that personal preferences should be placed on the backburner. The panel had to ask itself “If I was a newcomer to an ARRG bout, which name am I going to remember at the end of the evening?” In short, which skater will contain the nomenclature that will stick indefinitely into the memory bank? After serious pondering, the Molly deservedly went to Stunt Devil Mayor Francis Slayer. This is arguably the name that first timers often take notice of immediately. To add, when KTRS’ Charles Jaco immediately takes notice of your moniker in a radio interview, you know you’re onto something. And most importantly, how often do we see a derby name personally endorsed by its influential namesake? In summation, a landslide victory for “her honor.”

BEST HELMET

Protective gear is imperative for the safety of any ARRG athlete, especially when protecting the noodle. Beyond its regulation design, the helmet provides a wide open canvas for a skater’s creativity. It also provides a message board for the opposition. There were numerous solid entries in this category, ranging from Smarty McFly’s “Back to the Future” motif to Downtown Dallis’ Union Jack. After much deliberation, the panel awards the Molly to the Smashinistas’ Eli Wallop, whose bestickered, bedazzled lid not only characterized the skater, but also encapsulated the veteran’s career journey. Look closely, there’s even a “stache” affixed to it.

MRS. BLACKWELL’S BEST UNIFORM

In all cases, team members wear matching colors. Some individuals within that team -a good example being the Smashinistas - wear identical jerseys. But there are some times when a skater decides to take a bold step in a fashion sense and create a different approach. Such is the case with Stunt Devil South City Shiner, who augmented her appearance late in the season with a bedazzling uniform - an impressive purple leotard with silver accents. Sheer elegance with a hidden message: “I have style, yet I will knock you down if you get in my way.” An outfit designed for 24 hour service? Ya betcha!

BEST USE OF ACCESSORIES

Much like the derby name is an extension of the personality of an ARRG athlete, the non-skating accessories that accompany her further identify that personality. These are most apparent during the skater introductions pre-bout. Deathica Steele’s hatchet immediately comes to mind. But hands down, the panel’s favorite for 2010 wins for originality and execution. The Smashinistas’ Shillelagh Spillbllood wins the Molly by taking Irish pride to a whole new level. Complete with an Irish Flag and an actual shillelagh, Spillblood brings instant attention when taking the track. The panel was gave bonus points for the pint of Guinness that Spillblood featured within her profile picture in the ARRG souvenir program this year.

BEST NUMERICAL INDENTIFICATION

The jersey number that a skater wears sometimes makes a correlation to her derby name. Great examples of this include Grave Danger’s 6FU, Suri O’Killer’s 10 & Counting and The Forecloser’s Ch13. The winner of the Molly in this category exceeded the basics. When asked personally about her derby name, the Stunt Devils’ Smarty McFly makes no hesitation about her love of the “Back to the Future” franchise. The fact that she proudly displays the jersey number “1.21 Gigawatts” - the amount of voltage needed to operate the flux capacitor of the DeLorean DMC-12 - illuminates that passion. Dr. Emmet Brown would be happy - and so are we.

“MIEUX PARLER FRANCAIS”

Translated, this means “best French speak.” A controversial category, for this focuses on derbyspeak….uncensored derbyspeak. The kind of derbyspeak that makes kids turn to their parents and say, “What does that mean?” The Molly goes to the M80s’ Ana Warpath, whose quick verbal strikes made many take notice. But let’s be honest. Warpath’s silver tongue doesn’t mean that she can’t control herself - it’s just that she’s that passionate during bout proper - and that’s always a good thing. Her retirement at the end of the 2010 season guarantees one thing, the cheering section at the All-American is about to get even more colorful.

WATCH OUT AWARD

On the surface, this award could be mistaken for “Rookie of the Year.” However, the panel felt that this recognition should go out to a skater who had not been officially drafted by an ARRG team in 2010. A majority of these athletes were featured in the Arch Rival Rookie/St. Chux Derby Chix bout in June. But this decision was not just based upon that bout alone. Voting members also considered the effort at practices, which sometimes gives a better inclination of potential ability. After careful deliberation, the panel hands out the Molly to Stitches. Stitches was not an official member of an ARRG franchise in 2010 - safe money says that won’t be the case next season.

BEST LIP SERVICE

This Molly recognizes the moment that most skaters arguably dread the most…the post-bout interview at the All-American. Keep in mind that the ARRG athletes have just concluded a 60-minute scrap. Now they have to wax philosophical about it! The bout announcers appreciate all who cooperate in this monthly ritual, even at times when a skater would just rather relax and unwind. After careful consideration, the Molly in this category goes to the Smashinistas’ Punches Pileup, who as a whole blossomed this year as a skater. On the microphone, she was smooth as silk. And if the popular skater ever decides to one day retire from the track (and we know that won’t be anytime soon!), one knows that a microphone won’t be too far in the distance.

MOMENT OF HEART AWARD

In 2010, one moment that clearly defined the heart and passion that these skaters possess was crystallized with the unfortunate injury to M-80 blocker Suri O’ Killer, whose tumble in bout four resulted in a hush-hush moment at the All-American. Suri, after careful examination by the EMTs, was carted out on a stretcher from the track. In the process, ARRG Nation responded with a standing “O,” not just out of respect, but also out of pure love for the fallen skater. Suri responded to the adulation with blown kisses, an acknowledging wave and a reassuring smile that conveyed the message that “I’ll be back before you know it.”

And to her credit, the recovery has come along nicely, as the accompanying cane was quickly discarded and the skater was back to her feet in no time. Although it’s premature to speculate how soon she’ll be back to competitive action, it’s good to know that the worst was avoided. But most of you know this already, for she’s still a fixture at every home bout, even donning an apron to serve as “special guest waitress” for VIPs at the league championship.

MOST IMPOSING ENTOURAGE

There’s a skater’s dad sitting in the front row with a camera. The same skater’s mom has a penchant for making great confections. Her true love professes his derby passion for her on his t-shirt at every bout. Various family members fill out the large contingent of Stunt Devil fans when she plays. Her co-workers are amazed at her abilities. Her fans include a pair of luchadores. The winner of the Molly in this category and her following personify the true spirit of derby fandom. The group that follows Miss Lippy is large in numbers and spirit. Without Lippy, attendance drops dramatically. And yes, you read that right…luchadores.

BEST NON-SKATING MOMENT OF 2010

In bout six between the Smashinistas and the Stunt Devils, what once was a frustrating moment turned into arguably the best definition of what ARRG is all about. An electrical malfunction had simultaneously shut down the scoreboard clock and the PA system, which resulted in suspended play. With no quick fix in sight, ARRG decided to do what any fun lovin’ group would do in a similar situation - it improvised.

Complete with referee stunts, a “RomoWorm” and other assorted hijinx, ARRG filled a 10-minute suspension to the delight of the All-American crowd….or at it least it seemed that the crowd was delighted. No one left, no one booed, no one got testy. And it proved once again why ARRG audiences are some of the best in St. Louis athletics.

Congratulations to our deserving winners of the inaugural Mollys…and to all of ARRG for making it happen!

Disclaimer: The voting committee for the “Mollys” consists of a ten-member panel of select employees from the ARRG Newscenter. They include: The Grand Poobah, ARRG Correspondent - Hells LaBelle, ARRG Correspondent - Tex Remmey, Managing Editor - Knobby Rocker, Discontinuity Editor - Franklin Gothic, Font Acquisition and Sans Serif Wrangling - Pandora Proofing, Spelcheker - Billy Natchez, Sanitation Supervisor - The Reverend Diamond Mike Esquire, Your Favorite and Mine - Fabian Sparkle, Hyperlinking - Arch Kennedy, WZTV Chief Meteorologist.

CLICK ON THE PICTURE TO FIND OUT MORE ABOUT THIS SPECIAL ARRG TWO-DAY INVITATIONAL TO BE HELD IN AUGUST IN STL!

The Grand Poobah and Hells LaBelle are bout announcers for the 2010 season of the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news, information…and broken piñatas.

by The Grand Poobah

Photo Credit: Eggysan

(ST. LOUIS, MO) More so than other sports, roller derby is often characterized by momentum shifts. In just a few short minutes, large leads are gained - and lost.

And in the process, emotions can greatly turn 180 degrees - for both the benefactor and the unsuspecting.

On Saturday night at the All-American Sports Mall, a momentum shift inevitably resulted in a trophy lift.

And with the hoist of the prize came a few watered eyes.

Capitalizing on a 69-0 second half run, the Stunts Devils defeated the Smashinistas 146-73 in the ARRG 2010 League Championship in front of 1,000 derby-lovin’ fans.

For the Stunts, the victory marked back-to-back championships for the purple-clad skaters and the franchises’ sixth straight win.

“I’ve been crying like a baby,” said Stunt co-captain Mayor Francis Slayer following the bout. “Every single person on our team played the game of their life tonight.”

“I’m probably going to cry the rest of the night.”

It was tears of joy shed by the veteran - yet it did crystallize the emotions the team had experienced throughout the 2010 season, which included injuries, the loss of teammates and the added pressure to repeat.

“The core players on the team overcame a lot of adversity in the past year,” added jammer Artemischief. “Everybody stuck together. Everybody played for one another.”

Indeed. Yet heading into the title bout, it seemed that the Smashies had figured out a game plan that could topple the defending champs. An eight-point nailbiter last month between the two squads foreshadowed a potential upset.

And at one point during Saturday’s bout, it looked like that was going to happen.

The Smashinistas - thanks to a swing of momentum - erased a 35-point deficit en route to a four-point second half lead.

But by utilizing their own second-half shift, the Stunts proved to ARRG Nation why they deserve to retain the hardware.

To review, the agresssor out of the gate - as expected - would have the early advantage.

The Stunts Devils jumped out to a quick 17-3 lead in the bout’s first five minutes, paced by Artemischief’s three lead jams that collectively netted 11 points.

Smashies’ jammer Punches Pileup countered with a 4-pointer with 21:35 left in the first half to cut the deficit to ten.

But the Stunts would silence the Smashies midway through the first half.

The defending champs would go on a 17-0 run during the bout’s next five jams. Punctuated by Morgan LeFaetal’s 5-pointer, the Stunts pulled out to a 34-7 lead with 14:20 remaining.

The pressure continued as the half progressed. A pair of 7-pointers by Artemischief and South City Shiner extended the lead 48-13.

And it seemed that the outcome of 2010 title bout would be decided by halftime.

But the Smashinistas - characterized by their scrappy attitude - proved the skeptics wrong.

Smashie jammer Downtown Dallis - capitalizing on a penalized Stunt jammer - went off to the races. The Texan transplant’s 19-point tally with 4:35 left cut the gap to 48-32.

This would begin a 26-0 run for the Smashies. The Educator followed with four and Pileup added three to cut the deficit to 48-39 with 2:20 left.

LaFaetal broke the Stunts’ offensive drought with 1:21 left with a four-point jam, which concluded first half scoring.

After leading by 35 points just ten minutes prior, the Stunt Devils only posted a 52-39 lead at the halftime break. The baker’s dozen cushion did not seem safe against the Smashies.

And as the second half began, it wasn’t.

Punches Pileup notched a bout-changing 19-pointer early in the second half. The Smashies now possessed their first lead of the bout - a 56-52 edge with 28:10 remaining.

But unfortunately for the ladies in camo, it would be the last piece of scoring for a while - a long while - as a purple pitchfork practically poked the pretty princesses into a precarious predicament.

The Stunts would get lead jammer status for the next nine jams - and in the process go on an incredible 69-0 scoring streak in the bout’s next fourteen minutes.

Punctuated by a 23-point jam by Artemischief, the Stunts would pull out to a 124-56 lead.

The Stunts would go on to outscore the Smashies 94-34 in the second half - complimented by a pair of 13-pointers by Shiner and LaFaetal - to clinch the championship.

Artemischief notched a career best of 68 points to pace the Stunts Devils. Shiner added 52 while LeFaetal contributed 26.

Punches Pileup scored 30 to lead the Smashinistas, while Dallis contributed 26 points.

And even with the victory, the defending champs knew that they had to adjust in the second half when it looked like the trophy could have been stolen away.

“We had a couple of bad jams but then we really played great,” said Mayor Francis Slayer. “We just had to take a deep breath and go play our game, which is what we did and why we won.”

And how satisfying was it for the Stunts - who answered all the challenges in 2010 - to earn a second consecutive championship?

“So much that it made Mayor cry,” said Artemischief.

UNOFFICIAL SCORING

Stunt Devils - Artemischief 68, South City Shiner 52, Morgan LeFaetal 26

Smashinistas - Punches Pileup 30, Downtown Dallis 26, The Educator 17

SATURDAY NOTES FROM THE POOBAH

One has to tip their cap to this year’s runner-up, the Smashinistas, who overcame numerous challenges to make it to the 2010 title bout. One can expect that their quest for the championship will provide enough incentive to come out firing next season. I eagerly await to see what this talented group of skaters bring to the table in the future.

Scratches for Saturday’s bout were Polkadot yr Eyeout and Megalodominator for the Smashinistas and Smarty McFly for the Stunt Devils.

Much appreciation goes out to the 1,000 derby fans who came out the Saturday’s league championship. Your continued patronage is much appreciated and we hope to see you again for the two-day ARRGageddon Invitational on Saturday & Sunday, August 14 & 15.

Congratulations to the STLGatekeepers, the area’s first mens roller derby franchise, for a solid intraleague exhibition during the evening’s undercard. In the bout, The Force defeated the Dark Side 100-96. The Gatekeepers, who travel to St. Paul, MN on Saturday, August 24 to battle the Twin City Terroors, are actively recruiting skaters, officials and volunteers. Find out more by going to their website HERE.

Special thanks to those who participated in our charity raffle that benefitted Youth In Need. Over $500 was raised Saturday night for the non-profit. Thanks to your support at nine home bouts season, ARRG collectively raised $3,425 for Youth In Need. Thanks also this season to the business and individuals who contributed to the prize baskets this season. 

Click on the picture to find out more about this inaugural ARRG event, held in St. Louis on August 14 & 15!

Next week in the ARRG Newscenter: Reflection on the 2010 ARRG intraleague season. Your bout announcers recall their favorite moments.

The Grand Poobah and Hells LaBelle are bout announcers for the 2010 season of the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news and information…and wacky holidays. For example, did you know that Sunday is National Ice Cream Day?

In the process, the Stunts picked up their second consecutive ARRG title and the franchises’ sixth straight win.

A full recap of the championship bout can be found here Monday morning in the ARRG Newscenter.