BLISTERING START LEADS TO ALL-STARS’ 209-POINT WIN
by Muckety Muck, Derby News Network Contributing Writer – Photos by Bob Dunnell
(MEMPHIS, TN) For the Arch Rival Roller Girls’ All-Stars – the WFTDA’s North Central sixth-ranked team – a weekend roadtrip to the home of “The King of Rock-n-Roll” provided the perfect platform for a team that was looking to rebound after a loss to a lower-ranked squad last month.
A win against the Memphis Hustlin’ Rollers Saturday would right the ship back on track. Conversely, a loss to South Central’s #16 would surely raise some red flags.
As Elvis himself would say…”It’s Now or Never.”
Extremely rare is the case that a bout’s winning jam is determined less than four minutes in, but that’s precisely what happened as St. Louis’ best on quads notched a 238-29 victory at the Memphis Fairgrounds’ Pipkin Building in front of 300.
“Losing was not an option,” said ARRG All-Star blocker Party Foul after the bout. “This was their turf, this was their house, this was their floor and this was their crowd. It was really important for us to come back home with a win and it was really awesome that we did.”
The win improved the All-Stars record to 3-1 and eliminated seeds of doubt following their 53-point loss to North Central #9 Ohio on March 11.
“I think we needed a confidence booster,” Foul said. “A lot of us came back from the Ohio trip feeling a little confused because we did so well against (NC #8) Cincinnati the night before. A lot of us took the loss to Ohio really hard, so we needed to win this one.”
“We wanted to come into this game and prove that we could play better derby than that,” adds ARRG blocker Shimmy Hoffa. “It was a chance for us to really work on our teamwork and put it all back together again and start fresh.”
Little did anyone know how long – or in this case, short – it would take to claim victory.
Following a scoreless bout-opening jam, Black Market Baby posted a 30-point strike for Arch Rival at 26:30 to literally give the visitors the win.
Consider this. It took less time for ARRG to get the bout’s winning points over Memphis than it does to hear “Suspicious Minds” in its entirety.
“It’s always important for us to start with really high momentum,” said Hoffa of the fast sprint out of the gates. “We just wanted to get the game going and start putting points on the board. We started the game intense and wanted to maintain that intensity throughout the rest of the game.”
Following the 30-0 launch, Arch Rival proceeded with a baker’s dozen points unanswered. Downtown Dallis‘ four-pointer was followed by South City Shiner‘s five. Mighty Mighty Boston added another four to extend the lead to 43-0 at the 21:50 mark.
Memphis jammer Lil Cinner cracked open the goose egg with a two-point tally on the next jam, but St. Louis countered with another twelve straight to build a 55-2 lead midway through the period.
New Jersey Turndyke offered a glimmer of hope for Memphis by posting four with 14:50 left to cut the deficit to 55-6, but ARRG countered with another 22 points – capped by Boston 17-pointer – to stretch the lead to 77-6 with 12:00 left in the half.
Arch Rival racked up multiple double-digit jams as the period’s final third progressed. Dallis’ 14-point power jam at 8:15 was followed by South City Shiner’s 15-pointer, extending ARRG’s advantage to 110-8.
Boston posted another 18 deep in the frame to help Arch Rival stretch its lead to 128-12 at intermission.
The dominance in the second half would continue as the St. Louisans netted the first four jams of the second half, which resulted in a 46-0 run. Black Market Baby’s dozen, Dallis’ nine, Boston’s 18 and another five by BMB extended ARRG’s lead to 174-12 with 20:00 left.
The workhorses of the Arch Rival blocking schematic, paced by Foul, Hoffa, Chewblocka, Science Friction, Grave Danger, The Educator, May Require Stitches and a host of others, kept Memphis from barely breaking double digits in both halves.
“It provided a great safety net,” said Foul of her blocking sistren. “It gave us the chance to play the perfect derby that we could possibly play.”
Dallis’ four-pointer scored with 9:00 remaining broke the 200-point barrier for ARRG, which now sat on a 200-18 lead.
A 26-0 ARRG run – punctuated by Shiner’s 18-point power jam with under six minutes left – extended the cushion to 230-20.
Outscoring Memphis 110-17 in the second half to collect the 209-point victory, four St. Louis jammers posted 40-plus points apiece in the bout, paced by Boston’s 68 followed by Black Market Baby’s 66.
“I saw things out of them tonight that I’ve never seen before,” said Chewblocka of the jamming quartet. “I saw a lot of aggression, a lot of tight footwork and I saw them seize a lot opportunities tonight.”
But don’t think that all was perfect in the assessment. Even though they held Memphis scoring to low numbers, ARRG’s internal constructive criticism still looks for cleaner play overall.
“We definitely ran into penalty issues near the end,” said Chewblocka. “Even though we were able to control situations when we had players in the penalty box, it would better to never have players in the box to begin with.”
“There’s still a lot that we need to work on,” agrees Hoffa. “We still need to work on our penalties and tighten up some of the things that Memphis took advantage of towards the end. They started figuring out or strategies and adjusting. When a team starts adjusting, we need to still play our strongest game.”
And this will be important as Arch Rival returns to WFTDA North Central region action on Saturday, May 5 against NC #13 Bleeding Heartland at Midwest Sports Hockey.
“The first of bouts of the season are there to gauge and see where your strengths and weaknesses lie,” says Hoffa. “We get to see what works and what needs to get fixed. It makes the team stronger and it gives us a chance to train ourselves for what’s coming up ahead.”
UNOFFICIAL SCORING
ARCH RIVAL (238) – Mighty Mighty Boston 68, Black Market Baby 66, South City Shiner 56, Downtown Dallis 48
MEMPHIS (29) – Muse of Bruise 11, Tenacious B 10, Lil Cinner 4, New Jersey Turndyke 4
COMING UP TOMORROW AT 8 AM FOR ARRG’s “30n30″: They shake their poms, hold their signs and cheer on the skaters of the league. One rides a tricycle and another totes a really large pirate’s head. They don’t skate on bout night, but their involvement adds to the color of roller derby in St. Louis. They also give back with fundraisers and support events. On Tuesday, we look at the ARRG Jeerleaders.
ARRG’s “30n30″ is a daily feature that examines different aspects of the Arch Rival Roller Girls – St. Louis’ first female flat-track roller derby franchise. In this section every morning at 8 AM for the entire month of April, a new feature will be presented.
Other installments of ARRG’s “30n30″: PRE-SERIES SET-UP (1) EVOLUTION (2) THE DREAM TO PLAY AT CHAIFETZ (3) LOCAL SEASON RECAP (4) ARRG ALL-STARS (5) SAINT LUNACHIX (6) ROOKIE RIVALS (7) REFEREES & NSOs (8) PRE-BOUT RITUALS (9) POST-BOUT RITUALS (10) GUERILLA UNCAGED – NO MINORS (11) ARRG VS. MEMPHIS PREVIEW (12) CHARITY (13) CHAIFETZ PUBLICITY (14) McWHEELY PHOTOGRAPHY (15) GUERILLA UNCAGED – DERBY NAMES








Midwest MEGAteam
The task seems daunting. After all, there was no true “off-season” this year for one of St. Louis’ hottest athletic franchises.
ARRG’s 2010-11 local season continued its whirlwind progression to kick off the new year. At the January 8 doubleheader at All-American Sports Mall, undefeated
Longtime local television producer/critic Aaron Mermelstein from St. Louis’ Higher Education Channel produced a feature on ARRG entitled
The month saw the
Intraleague action continued on February 12 as ARRG began its two-event local playoff scramble at All-American Sports Mall in front of 1,000 fans. In first round action that featured re-matches from the prior month, top-seeded Rebel Skate Alliance topped the M-80s 146-99. The twin-attack of RSA’s McFly and Starry Starry Fight scored 64 and 58 points, respectively. In the other first round match-up, Dallis scored 53 points to pace the Smashinistas’ 87-58 victory over the Stunt Devils.
The next round of the 2010-11 ARRG playoffs – held at All-American Sports Mall – saw the undefeated streak continue for the top seed while the remaining three squads scramble for an invite to the league’s championship bout. Rebel Skate Alliance cruised to April’s trophy bout with a 155-77 victory over the Smashinistas. Meanwhile, a bout-winning last jam by Artemischief helped the Stunt Devils best the M-80s 89-87 in the other playoff bracket. With identical playoff records of 1-1 for both the Smashies and the Stunts Devils in the post-season, a larger point differential from bouts played garnered the Stunts the other title bout berth.
The following weekend, the ARRG All-Stars logged the most miles ever traveled in one weekend with a trek to Colorado. On March 20, ARRG defeated WFTDA West Region
A new venue was the site of the 2010-11 ARRG local championships. Over 1,000 derby faithful packed Ballwin’s Midwest Sport Hockey on April 9 to witness a changing of the guard within the league. A 62-point lead at the half was enough to ensure a league championship for the expansion Rebel Skate Alliance. The 131-53 victory over the Stunt Devils concluded an unblemished six-win inaugural campaign. Starry Starry Fight finished with 47 points for RSA, while Party Foul and Smarty McFly added 43 and 41, respectively. Morgan LeFaetal paced the runner-up Stunts with 21 points.
In the league’s third place bout, rookie May Require Stitches scored 75 points to help the M-80s top the Smashinistas 127-107, which would be their one lone victory of the 2010-11 season. Downtown Dallis paced the fourth-place Smashinistas with 66 points.
The ARRG Rookie Rivals – a developmental squad of unrostered ARRG skaters – began its 2011 campaign with a 75-40 loss to the CoMo Derby Dames Wreckoning Crew in Columbia, MO on April 24.
The ARRG All-Stars broke into the WFTDA North Central Top 10 as the month began, climbing one spot to reach the tenth position. In defense of the climb, the All-Stars hosted
The following weekend, ARRG collectively put together its best “A/B” punch in league history, picking up four collective wins at the second installment of
For the ARRG developmentals, the brew tasted smooth as well. A pair of wins for the Saint Lunachix as they topped the Brewcity Battlestars 166-85 and Mad Rollin’ Dolls Team Unicorn 200-92. Munchausen by Foxy scored 60 and Morgan LeFatael scored 68 in the respective wins. The two-bout sweep improved the team’s record to 6-1.
The ARRG All-Stars continued their hard charge within the WFTDA North Central region on June 11 with a 181-40 win over
Off the flat-track during the month, the league raced for the cure, showed off its pride and grappled in gelatinous goop. On June 4, ARRG participated in the 13th Annual Komen Race for the Cure held in downtown St. Louis. The event drew over 66,000 participants and raised $3 million locally. The league, along with the STL Gatekeepers, skated in the 31st Annual Pride St. Louis Parade, held June 25 on Grand Avenue near Forest Park. The weekend event drew over 80,000 spectators. That same weekend, ARRG presented its most non-traditional fundraiser to date, a PG-rated “sports entertainment-style” jello wrestling event at FUBAR downtown. The monies raised helped ARRG travel expenses for the summer.
On the weekend of July 9, the three ARRG travel teams found themselves in the Windy City for a trifecta of bouts against the
Then on July 16, a stubborn blocking schematic helped the ARRG All-Stars get back on the winning track in a 137-59 home victory over North Central
ARRG travel teams split a pair of bouts in a cross-state road trip on August 13. The ARRG All-Stars fell to WFTDA South Central powerhouse
One week later, multiple benchmarks were broken as the ARRG All-Stars jettisoned North Central
On September 9 at Midwest Sport Hockey, ARRG hosted “Stop, Drop and Roller Derby,” a benefit for the West County EMS and Fire Protection District. The doubleheader night of derby action was highlighted by a competitive battle between ARRG’s Saint Lunachix and the
The ARRG All-Stars – now ranked eighth in the WFTDA North Central Region – returned to Indianapolis for
On November 5, the 2011-12 local season kicked off at Midwest Sport Hockey with an impressive display by two of ARRG’s legacy squads. Paced by Artemischief’s 46 points, the Stunt Devils topped defending champs RSA 122-77. Newcomer Pink Diamond topped RSA scoring with 31 points. Meanwhile, EnYa Nightmare posted 76 points – 30 collected off of one power jam – to help the M-80s best the Smashinistas 159-133. Downtown Dallis scored 49 for the Smashies.
Fans witnessed arguably the best double-header night of action in league history with a pair of knock-down drag-out bouts at Midwest Sport Hockey. With a 25-point power jam scored by Artemischief on the bout’s final jam, the Stunt Devils jumped into the standings lead with a 136-132 come-from-behind win over the M-80s. Munchausen by Foxy and EnYa Nightmare posted over 40 each to lead the M-80s in scoring. In the opener, a strong second-half scoring surge propelled the Smashinistas to a 123-102 win over RSA. The Educator posted 48 points to lead Smashie scoring while Stabby McCutcha collected 36 in a newfound jammer’s role.
Also at the December bout, a collaboration of efforts raised close to $1,400 in one night for a pair of local non-for-profits. Thanks to skater and team donations, matching contributions, a donation from a local Lions’ Club and raffle participation by the fans, ARRG nation raised close to $1,200 for Safe Connections, the league’s charity partner for the season. $200 was also raised for Touchpoint Autism Services with the sale of XMAS ornaments created by league members.
Of course, this summation only highlights certain aspects of the league’s activities in the past calendar year. Keep in mind its involvement in the continuing development of derby of St. Louis goes well beyond what was listed here.
















Both ARRG travel squads will take the trip up to the Badger State this weekend to participate in the two-day
The Chicago Outfit (3-1) is making some commotion within the region in a relatively short amount of time.
Burning River (1-3) is looking to gain revenge over ARRG, who topped Cleveland’s best 161-57 at Midwest Brewhaha 2010.
The St. Lunachix
Rockford became an official member of the WFTDA’s North Central region last June.




(ST. LOUIS, MO) The lovely ladies of the Arch Rival Roller Girls will be a part of the 8th Annual Sports Trivia Championship to be held this Friday night at Chaefitz Arena in St. Louis.



