After months of intense training, scrimmages and bouts, the local season reaches its pinnacle this Saturday night as the Arch Rival Roller Girls present the 2013 League Championships!

In the championship finale, the Stunt Devils (3-1) battle the Smashinistas (3-1). Prior to the main event, the M-80s (2-2) and Rebel Skate Alliance (0-4) compete in the League’s third place bout.

The double header takes place at Midwest Sport Hockey (570 Weidman Rd., Ballwin, MO). Doors open at 6:30 pm and the first whistle blows at 7 pm.

Tickets on bout night are $15 cash only at the door. Children 10 and under get in free. Save $3 per ticket by purchasing online at Brown Paper Tickets at THIS LINK RIGHT HERE! (Note: Online sales end late Friday night!)

As Saturday proceeds, two teams will end the local season on a high note. Conversely, two squads will lick their wounds and prepare for next season. And with some very important pre-bout additions by all four squads via a supplemental draft a few weeks ago, picking favorites this weekend become difficult.

For the Stunt Devils, they return to familiar territory in the title bout. For the past six seasons, the purple rollers have been in the championship match. However, the Stunts have had a long stretch since lifting the trophy. The last time they hoisted hardware was 2010.


Saturday night might be the moment that that streak is broken. Thanks to consistent scoring and top-notch blocking last month, the Stunts dispatched defending ARRG champions the M-80s by 80 points in the playoff round.

All the things that have worked well for the Stunt Devils throughout the regular season were executed to perfection last month. Jammers Mighty Mighty Boston, South City Shiner and Mayor Francis Slayer posted strong efforts. All three will be back in the fold this weekend and expect all to be “impact players.” Stunt addition Killer Painguin will also supplement the jamming rotation.

The blocking was also top-notch in February. Veteran Grave Danger anchored the charge, while Morgan Le Faetal, Hydrogen Bombshell, Dolly RotN, Biohazard Betty, Shacgyver, Arcane Sugar, Toe-Stop Believin’ and Vod KaKnockers contributed valuable minutes. The depth displayed will once again be imperative for the Stunts Saturday night.

But there are question marks following the team. Veteran Stunt blocker Deathica Steele suffered a knee injury during a travel tournament in early February and she is out for the title bout. That will undoubtedly leave an imperative hole to fill.


To compensate, the Stunts drafted a returning veteran. Chokehold Chanel No. 5, a former ARRG All-Star in the late-00’s, dons purple colors this weekend. A skater who can assume multiple roles, Choke can be a “difference maker” in her first bout with a brand new team. This will be her third local squad in her ARRG tenure and one can expect that her presence will be immediately felt.

It’s been a while since we’ve paired the words “Stunts” and “champs” in the same sentence. No doubt, the missive this weekend will be to return to former glory.

Meanwhile our other championship finalist – the Smashinistas – has never held the title-winning status. In fact, the last time they had an opportunity for the trophy was the same night the Stunts last won the title.


But that was then and this is now and the complexion of the Smashies has changed considerably in three seasons. One could argue that Saturday’s line-up is its most solid ever-fielded.

In the playoff round, the Smashinistas dismantled Rebel Skate Alliance by 141 points. And much like their championship counterparts, depth has been paramount in a solid local season campaign. Key components return for the squad’s first potential title win.

The jamming tandem of The Educator and Brickyard each posted triple digits in February’s playoff round. They’ll be supplemented by Shimmy Hoffa in the rotation.


The integral aspect to the line-up will be the solid blocking corps, paced by veterans PolkaDot ‘Yr Eyeout, Boom Boom Pow, The Forecloser, Shell Shoxx, Megalodominator, Sly Davinita, Party Rockher and Mali Bruz Barbie.

One key cog missing in the Smashies’ machine this Saturday is veteran skater Eli Wallop. The All-Star went down with injury earlier this year and is out of the championship mix. As a result, the aforementioned skaters will have to assume additional minutes and responsibilities.

The Smashies also added some depth via last month’s draft with selection of Cloke n’ Drag-Her, who came through ARRG’s developmental system.

The work this season from the camo-clad troops has been outstanding overall. They don’t want to throw this prime opportunity away.

Although it is a given that a new local champion gets crowned this Saturday night, the favorite to pick is anyone’s guess. The experience and depth displayed by both squads will undoubtedly result in a match-up that could potentially reach epic proportions.

The team that wins the title will have definitely deserved it.

Meanwhile, plenty of intrigue also surrounds the third place bout.


Last season’s League champions the M-80s suffered a setback in February’s playoff round. The squad, hampered by a shortened bench, lost by 80 points to the Stunt Devils. The firecrackers didn’t like the fizzle. They look to rebound with a sizzle.

Jammer EnYa Nightmare is set to prove why she’s so doggone good. The veteran posted over 30 points in the playoff round. IDA the Living Dead posted comparable numbers as well. She’ll have to arguably have her best bout yet in her rookie campaign this Saturday night. Multi-positional starter May Require Stitches is used to high minutes, whether donning the star or not. Expect her to make a difference.


Pacing the packs will be co-captains Rhino-Might and The Ginger Assassin, who have respectively jumped leaps and bounds in their responsibilities this season. And look for the steadily-improving Sp!ce Rack, Molecular Mayhem, Julia Ghoulia and Stray Touhell to also contribute heavily.

The M-80s have also added some depth heading into the third place bout as the squad acquired blocker The Siege, a long-time red-clad vet who can hold opponents at bay.

Standing in their path for third place is the pesky counter clock-wise collaborative known as Rebel Skate Alliance. Despite a winless record heading into the third place bout, one will have to admit that RSA has steadily improved as the season has progressed.


There’s good reason to feel confident if one feels intergalactic. Veterans Smarty McFly, Chewblocka and Party Foul propel the squad in numerous capacities. Jammer Pink Diamond continues to improve and post impressive results.

Rookie Prof. Rumbledore has been put in key situations that belie her length of tenure. Veteran pivot Ginny Beastly has also churned out her best work yet.


Also key will be the return of ARRG 2012 Rookie of the Year The Oregon Betrayal, who was not in the line-up for the playoff round. Sophomores Warpath O. Jen, Deuce Bomber and N’Toss Ya and rookie Lady MacDeath will also be featured in prime situations.

The on-track tryout last month of rookie Shear-Ra Powers paid off in spades for RSA. The squad picked her up full-time via last month’s draft due to her performance. They also added to the line-up jammer Hotrod Herbie, a hard-charging transfer from the Metro East.

RSA historically has always been considered a “wild card” for knowledgeable ARRG fans. Saturday night might be the night that the Rollin’ Rebs get back onto the winning side of the ledger.

The undercard will showcase what both these teams have had to battle through the regular season. Expect both to come out full-throttle to pick up an imperative victory.

While you’re at Midwest Sport Hockey, be sure to stop by the official ARRG merchandise table to help propel your team to victory. Support your favorite local squad as they compete for an important “W!”

Also visit the charity raffle table, where tickets can be purchased for $1 apiece or six for $5. This season, ARRG’s charity partner is CHADS Coalition of St. Louis. Charity raffle prizes include ARRG bout tickets, gift certificates from area businesses and other collectibles. Remember, you can’t win if you don’t participate!

This Saturday night, ARRG puts the capper to an extremely competitive local season. You’ll want to stick around until the very end to see how it all shapes up!

We’ll see you this Saturday at Midwest Sport Hockey for the ARRG 2013 Local Championships!

For updated information as the week progresses, visit ARRG’s official Facebook page. On Sunday, we’ll have exclusive interviews and footage from Championship night!

NEXT MONDAY IN THE ARRG NEWSCENTER: Find out what happened in length at this Saturday’s double header. We’ll have full recaps of both bouts!

Muckety Muck and Magilla Guerilla are bout co-announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news/information.

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