TWIN BILL DETERMINES FEBRUARY PLAYOFF SEEDINGS!
by Muckety Muck, ARRG Bout Co-Announcer – Photos by Bob Dunnell
This weekend, the final event of the Arch Rival Roller Girls’ 2012-13 local regular season sets the table for the upcoming playoff…and there’s plenty riding in both bouts.
General admission tickets at the door this Saturday night are $15. Children 10 and under get in free. Save $3 per ticket by purchasing in advance online at Brown Paper Tickets by going to THIS LINK RIGHT HERE. Groups of 15 or more can purchase advance tickets for as low as $10 by going to the same link above. (Muckety Memo: Advance ticket sales end this Friday night. If you purchase tickets in advance and elect to pick up tickets at the door, there is no additional fee added to the cost of the ticket.)
In Saturday’s opener, the Stunt Devils (2-0) battle the hard-charging Smashinistas (1-1). That high-stakes match-up will be followed by a pivotal battle between defending League champions the M-80s (1-1) and Rebel Skate Alliance (0-2).
After the final whistle blows Saturday night, the complexion of the post-season takes shape. With the possibility of three teams finishing the regular season with identical 2-1 records, the squad that takes the top seed in February’s playoff round might be determined by cumulative points scored during the past three months.
Don’t believe me? Look at the ending “Standings” graphic at the end of this column!
There’s going to be plenty of “scoreboard watching” Saturday…and we hope you bring a calculator to keep pace.
The top seed for the post-season will be determined outright if League standings leader the Stunt Devils score the win in the opener. Last month, the Stunts went for the jugular early and glided to a 222-88 win over Rebel Skate Alliance to improve to 2-0.
Overall, there was little, if anything, to be critical about in the Stunts’ impressive win. Numerous veterans displayed dominant efforts and younger skaters gained valuable track time.
Veteran jammer South City Shiner was a whisker away from recording triple-digit scoring and Mighty Mighty Boston collected over 80 points. Newfound jammer Mayor Francis Slayer netted another strong performance and transfer Killer Painguin posted the type of numbers that were projected. All four will be in jammer rotation again this weekend.
Blocking improved across the board for the Stunts in the December win. Veterans Grave Danger and Deathica Steele were assisted by youngsters Morgan Le Faetal, Arcane Sugar, Hydrogen Bombshell, Biohazard Betty, Toe Stop Belevin’, Shacgyver and Vod KaKnockers. This talented core posted solid minutes and kept penalties to a minimum.
The Stunt Devils were literally “a complete purple package” in December. They’ll have to keep that skill set high against their hard-charging opponents.
The Smashinistas suffered a 169-154 setback to the M-80s last month to drop to 1-1. Although the loss to the defending League champs stung at the time, there were numerous bright spots in the effort that made the future extremely promising.
In December, longtime Smashie jammer The Educator continued the type of scoring that we had been accustomed to locally by the vet. The 90-point effort, alongside 80 posted by Brickyard, continued the camo-clad troopers’ solid “1-2 punch” in offense. Shimmy Hoffa and Party Rockher also contributed to the jammer rotation and both will be expected to bring their “A” game this weekend…or should that be their “J” game?
Complimenting the quartet will be a solid core of blockers, paced by veterans Eli Wallop, PolkaDot ‘Yr Eyeout, The Forecloser, Shell Shoxx, Megalodominator, Sly Davinita and Mali Bruz Barbie. Arguably, a critical component to the Smashie schema this Saturday is veteran Boom Boom Pow, whose skill set was lost last month due to illness.
If there was a team that could stop the Stunts’ undefeated streak and send the standings into a kerfuffle, it would most certainly be the Smashinistas. And with two high-scoring performances recorded through two events this season, a high-scoring win Saturday would more than likely lead to the top seed for the February playoff round.
Needless to say, there’s a lot riding on this one. Expect a barnburner!
Saturday’s second bout also holds plenty of intrigue as it contains playoff implications, especially for the defending League champions.
The M-80s utilized a pair of 30-point rallies last month against the Smashinistas to score a 15-point win and improve to 1-1. Yet, the team will be the first to freely admit that the victory could have easily been a loss if not for a few lucky breaks.
A key cog to the red-clad offense returned last month as jammer Black Market Baby posted over 70 points. EnYa Nightmare collected her usual high output and multi-positional starter May Require Stitches scored imperative points down the stretch. All three will be workhorses of the jammer rotation Saturday alongside rookie Ida the Living Dead.
Veteran blocker Rhino Might is also projected to receive large amounts of track time and could see a rotation or two with a star on her helmet. Co-captain The Ginger Assassin and sophomore Kimical Burn also compliments the blocking schema.
However, what will be interesting to watch this weekend will be the performances of the M-80 off-season additions, who will each respectively get more track time. Blockers Spice Rack, Julia Ghoulia, Stray Touhell and Molecular Mayhem have certainly impressed in early appearances. This could be the bout that we see each skater bring her game up to the next level. Solid performances Saturday will bring a huge surge of team confidence heading into the playoff round.
A victory this weekend would give the M-80s a record of 2-1. More importantly, a huge win combined with a low-scoring Smashie victory in the opening bout MIGHT mathematically give the firecrackers the top seed for the playoff round.
There was an intentional reason the word MIGHT was all capitalized. Three simple letters…R-S-A.
Despite two lopsided losses this season, Rebel Skate Alliance continues to be the team that one cannot take likely. In both their bouts during the regular season, they’ve displayed the type of “cerebral derby” that they play best. Conversely, they’ve also taken some unfortunate penalties at inopportune times that affected the outcomes. The latter has to be minimized in order for the Rollin’ Rebs to collect a victory Saturday.
Pink Diamond and Spider Monkey have been featured as RSA’s primary jammers this season and both will resume those roles. Also expect multi-positional specialist Smarty McFly to don the star alongside rookie Prof. Rumbledore.
The blocking trio of Chewblocka, Party Foul and The Oregon Betrayal will potentially log plenty of minutes alongside veteran pivot Ginny Beastly. N’Toss Ya, Lady McDeath, Deuce Bomber, Bertha Venus and Warpath O’ Jen rounds out the RSA blocking battalion.
This is a team that holds a lot of promise and would love nothing more than to play spoiler this Saturday. The talent is most certainly there. The M-80s also recognize this, for they are a young group as well and have shown the tendency to make the same missteps that affect the scoreboard.
As cliché as it may sound, the team that makes the fewest mistakes in Saturday’s nightcap wins outright. Which rollers will be the ones to capitalize on the other’s errors?
Aside from the action on the flat-track, there’s plenty of activity to be found off-the-track this Saturday night.
While you’re at Midwest Sport Hockey, be sure you visit the ARRG merchandise table. From noise makers to team-specific t-shirts, there are plenty of items to help support your favorite local ARRG squad!
Also visit the charity raffle table, where tickets can be purchased for $1 apiece or six for $5. This season, ARRG’s charity partner is CHADS Coalition of St. Louis. Charity raffle prizes include ARRG bout tickets, gift certificates from area businesses and other collectibles. Remember, you can’t win if you don’t participate!
After Saturday’s double header, continue the fun at ARRG’s official post-bout after-party, held at Atomic Cowboy (4140 Manchester Avenue, St. Louis, MO.) While visiting the eclectic hot spot located in the “Grove” section of St. Louis, you can relive your favorite moments of the night with the athletes of ARRG while enjoying late night specials. There’s no cover charge for the official ARRG post-bout after party at Atomic Cowboy!
As the evening progresses, the table will begin to be set for ARRG’s 2013 post-season. By evening’s end, we might see a few surprises. That’s how unpredictable the action has been this season.
We’ll see you this Saturday at 7 pm at Midwest Sport Hockey!
Check ARRG’s official FACEBOOK PAGE for late-minute information throughout the week as well as player interviews from the bouts on Sunday.
NEXT MONDAY IN THE ARRG NEWSCENTER: The 2013 playoff is set! Who claimed the top spot? Who dominated at the January 12 double header? We’ll relive all the moments you experienced with full bout recaps from the weekend event.
Muckety Muck and Magilla Guerilla are bout co-announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news/information.