PLUS,TRIVIA NIGHT APPROACHES & ARRG HEATS UP STL!
by Magilla Guerilla, ARRG Bout Co-Announcer – Photos by Bob Dunnell (mrwheely.com)
Okay, so the Guerilla was a little busy this week and well, we did have a little bit of a blowout affair for the playoff round, so I might run a little short this week, my apologies.
Wait, why is everyone cheering?
The dust has settled from February 4 and we are looking at the two best teams of the regular season facing off for the local season’s championship in April.
Even though I am a sucker for the underdogs, I can’t deny that both the Stunt Devils and the M-80s have been on a collision course for this finale all season long and both looked very good in the playoff two weekends ago.
While the Smashinistas and the Rebel Skate Alliance didn’t win and at times it wasn’t pretty, some interesting things came out of their bouts and there is every indication that both squads will be bringing the heat in their third place match.

Despite the odds, RSA gave a valiant effort in the playoff round!
First, I would be remiss if I didn’t point out what incredible heart and passion for the sport the ladies of RSA displayed in their bout. I – like many a fan, skater or volunteer – arrived to the evening’s affair interested to see how a healthier group of Rebels might do against the Stunts. Instead, I learned that they wouldn’t have Party Foul, Chewblocka, Pink Diamond and Bertha Venus dressed for the bout.
“Oh, that’s all, no problem!” Yikes…
When Smarty McFly’s skate disintegrated on turn two late in the bout, I patiently waited for frogs to begin raining out of the sky on the beleaguered ladies of the Rebel Skate Alliance, because their remarkable debut season last year was countered with this season’s plague of injuries, bad luck and tough breaks…literal, actual breaks not metaphorical ones.

The Stunts were all business in their quest for a title tilt!
Magilla Guerilla’s unsolicited advice of the day for the Rebel Skate Alliance: Conduct a séance and figure out what evil spirit is haunting your team and then banish that sucker right away.
Instead, an outgunned group of veteran RSA skaters, newly recruited rookies and wrangled undrafted skaters took the track against the Stunts and let it all hang out. I hope everyone that skated in that bout and everyone that watched it enjoyed their spirit and their commitment to derby, because I know I did.
The score wasn’t pretty, but it shouldn’t matter to fans of this team that watched newly drafted Eveready and Warpath O’ Jen along with non-rostered Spice Rack and Glinda Gams come out of rookie training to give their all against a tough and talented Stunt Devil team. There are some things you can’t learn in practice and some things that you can only learn about yourself when pressed. They didn’t win, but the Rebel Skate Alliance didn’t come away empty handed.
Neither did the Smashinistas, the winners of the “Mercurial Local Derby Team of The Year” award. In what turned out to be a hard hitting, very intense affair between the M-80s, the Smashinistas came up short once again, but they did find themselves a nice rookie addition.

Newcomer Brickyard had an impressive debut for the Smashies!
It didn’t take long for the camo-clad skaters to toss out their newly drafted teammate, Brickyard, as a jammer. She wowed the crowd by scoring 40 points in her league debut and showed a fearless approach against some tough M-80 competition. Welcome aboard, nice to meet you too, Brickyard!
However, this rookie splash wasn’t enough to keep the Smashies in the bout and the M-80s eventually exacted their will over the opposition, blasting out a 40+ point run and never looking back. Penalties reared their ugly head once again and this talented and sometimes perplexing squad was unable to match the speed and aggression of the M-80s in the second half.
Once again, the M-80s displayed a very effective knack for holding back the opposition when they went on a power jam. This team just doesn’t suffer when they are down a blocker or jammer and they operate very effectively in groups of two.
I won’t be so bold as to suggest they practice and strategize with two skater “mini walls” in mind, but they are effective when this does happen and it really opens up the track for their jammers and gives them the freedom of effective offense and defense at the same time.

The zebras maintained control throughout!
Before I forget, a quick shout out of praise to the officials of this bout. Well done! This was a very challenging bout to assess and while it is easy to second guess anything in the heat of the moment, the speed and the aggression on display to start this off was almost jarring. I don’t envy the thankless job of the “zebras,” but they addressed the tension that could have boiled over into something unpleasant and kept it in check.
So the Smashinistas go back to the drawing board to look inward and find a way to get one last win in April’s third place bout against the Rebels. They beat them already this season, but if the curse gets lifted on RSA, they will be possibly bringing in their complete team for the first time all season.
And how do you make a rough season end on a high note? Win your bout at Chaifetz, that’s how. There isn’t anything easy in local roller derby, folks.

Black Market Baby scored 96 for the M-80s in the playoff round.
What can we expect from the Stunts and the M-80s in the Championships on April 28? Well, there will be much more time to talk about that in detail prior to the big event.
However, this is going to be a classic heavyweight match up and if it ends anything like the last jam heroics of their regular season bout, then the fans coming to Chaifetz will be in for a treat.
“That is all you are going to say about the Championship, Magilla? Come on man, that isn’t right!!”
Trust me, you will see some upcoming coverage for the local Championship that will knock your skates off, so just sit tight, we have until the end of April to talk about it.
Besides, we have a little change of pace prior to the big event that needs some attention. Did you forget about the Arch Rival Roller Girl All Stars and the St. Lunachix?
Next month is the start of the road to a WFTDA championship for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Yeah, I said championship, you read that right. Folks, this is serious business and if you aren’t playing for it all, then you shouldn’t even be playing.
One of the keys to winning is taking care of business at home and so I would encourage all of the fans of this league to come out and pack the house at the Midwest Sport Complex on Saturday, March 3 to create a hostile environment for the visitors.

ARRG needs your support vs. Madison on Saturday, March 3!
Who is coming into the lion’s den next month? The Mad Rollin’ Dolls visit out of Madison, Wisconsin sending their travel teams, The Dairyland Dolls and Team Unicorn, for this double header night.
The Mad Rollin’ Rolls were a dominant force in 2009-10, finding themselves near the top of the North Central division that entire span and advancing to the playoff round of the WFTDA Championships.
Last year was a bit of a transition for their team as many key skaters transferred. As a result, they slipped in the rankings and finished the year at #10 after going winless in the 2011 North Central Region Playoff.
It is hard to say how they will start 2012 and only time will tell if they have been able to reload their ranks in key positions. Regardless, the Dolls will want to start their season off right by stealing a win on the road, so the Arch Rival Roller Girls All Stars will have to bring it strong to avoid any such shenanigans.
The Dairyland Dolls might be picking on the All Stars at a vulnerable time. The injury bug has bitten ARRG and some traditional starters look to be out for this tilt. Skaters old and new will be thrust into their roles looking to shore up the holes made by injuries and I can assure you that they won’t back down an inch.
ARRG’s fans need to come out in force and help give them that extra encouragement they need with a packed house.
The opening bout will feature one of the best non-chartered all-star teams in the country in the St. Lunachix. This team only lost one bout all season last year (10-1) and took on heavy hitting squads all across the country, so don’t think you are watching a simple warm up bout.
The Lunachix will bring a mix of rookie and veteran skaters alike out to really emphasize the incredible depth this league has to offer against a Team Unicorn team they faced and defeated last year in a tough scrap at the 2011 Midwest Brewhaha.
You know, this really wasn’t a very short article now was it? Sorry, no refunds! Anyway, strap on your pads and tighten your skates, folks.
Roller derby in St. Louis is just getting warmed up for 2012!
TICKETS FOR APRIL’S BOUTS AT CHAIFETZ NOW ON SALE!
Tickets for the ARRG 2012 Local Championships – to be held Saturday, April 28 at the Chaifetz Arena in St. Louis – are now officially on sale.
GO TO THE CHAIFETZ WEBSITE RIGHT HERE TO PURCHASE YOUR ADVANCE TICKETS ONLINE!
Some early notes:

SLU's Chaifetz Arena, Home of ARRG's 2012 Finale - Photo Credit: SLU Athletics
Ticket prices will be different than bouts held at Midwest Sports Hockey.
Seating will be available at floor level for the event.
Students of St. Louis University can save $3 in advance with tickets purchased online.
The usage of cameras at the event is not only allowed, but it is encouraged.
More information about “the big one” will be released shortly.
ARRG TO APPEAR AT SPORTS TRIVIA CHAMPIONSHIP
The lovely ladies of the Arch Rival Roller Girls will be a part of the World’s Greatest Sports Trivia Championship to be held this Friday night at Chaifetz Arena in St. Louis.
The ninth-annual event – which raises proceeds for St. Patrick Center – will have over 1,000 participants compete for the ultimate sports fan package in the world’s largest sports trivia contest.
ARRG will be out and about during the event, handing out complimentary souvenirs to the participants.
Last year’s event raised over $791,000 in revenue and contributed good and services to benefit St. Patrick Center’s homeless and poor clients and their families.
To find out more about the Sports Trivia Championship, CLICK RIGHT HERE.
ARRG ANNUAL TRIVIA NIGHT APPROACHES!
Registration for the fourth annual ARRG Trivia Night – held on Friday, February 24 in St. Louis – is still open for those wanting to register their table of ten players.
Go to this link at Brown Paper Tickets RIGHT HERE to reserve your table.
Here are the details for the event:
WHAT: 4th Annual ARRG Trivia Night
WHEN: Friday, February 24 at 7 pm (Doors open/registration at 6 pm)
WHERE: The German Cultural Society, 3652 South Jefferson, St. Louis, MO
COST: $20 per person (includes free beer, wine, soda and light snacks – no outside alcohol, please.) Tables of ten can be pre-registered for $200 per table.
Mark your calendars now for a fun night of competitive trivia action that feeds your brain…and helps ARRG.
ARRG TO APPEAR AT ST. LOUIS MARDI GRAS PARADE!
Enjoying a little St. Louis Mardi Gras revelry alongside the STLGateKeepers – the mens flat-track roller derby franchise of St. Louis – ARRG will appear at the 2012 River City Grand Parade this Saturday in Soulard.
The parade steps off at 11 am at Busch Stadium and continues down Broadway to the AB/In-Bev headquarters.
Considered the largest parade in the Midwest, the annual Grand Parade will feature over 130 units ranging from the large and long standing parade krewes to new participants just getting started with this Saint Louis tradition.
Look for ARRG & the GateKeepers on the parade route. They’ve always entertained the crowd at numerous parades and expect the same this Saturday morning.
If this will be your first time to the Grand Parade, it is recommended that you arrive early to find a good parking spot and watch spot along the route. If bringing children, a watch spot earlier in the route is recommended since the crowd near the Soulard end can sometimes be a little…ahem…adult.
For more information about the parade GO TO THIS LINK RIGHT HERE!
ARRG HELPS HEAT-UP ST. LOUIS AT “RISE AND SHINE!”

ARRG with St. Louis County Executive Charles Dooley at Friday's "Rise and Shine" event! Photo credit: Rob McLean, marylandheights.patch.com
Members of the Arch Rival Roller Girls greeted early Friday patrons at select Hardee’s locations for the 12th annual Heat-Up St. Louis “Rise and Shine” event.
Altogether, over 550 volunteers helped raise a record $95,000 for Heat-Up St. Louis, a 10% increase over last year’s total.
The Arch Rival Roller Girls participated at the Hardee’s located on Hampton Ave. in St. Louis and in Maryland Heights.
Go to THIS LINK RIGHT HERE from marylandheights.patch.com to see a story with ARRG’s Biohazard Betty about the “Rise and Shine” event and about ARRG’s community outreach efforts.
Heat-Up St. Louis, Inc. is a regional, all-volunteer, utility assistance and public education charity that assists area seniors, the disabled and low-income households with children with their utility bills in the bi-state area.
NEXT WEEK IN THE ARRG NEWSCENTER: Are you smarter than a roller girl? The fourth annual ARRG trivia night is around the corner. So what’s one to expect at the league’s biggest fundraiser?
Magilla Guerilla and the Grand Poobah are bout co-announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section on Monday for the latest in ARRG news/information.






