RACIN’, ROLLIN’ & RASSLIN’ FILLS UP THE CALENDAR!
by the Grand Poobah
(ST. LOUIS, MO) The Arch Rival Roller Girls have put the finishing touches on a very productive- and bountiful – month of May.
The ARRG All-Stars finished the month with three wins against three solid North Central rivals, the Saint Lunachix rolled up two dominant wins at Midwest Brewhaha 2011 and the league graced newsstands with its first magazine cover story.
Expect the month of June to be just as busy with activities on and off the flat-track.
ARRG PREPARES FOR KOMEN RACE FOR THE CURE
The Arch Rival Roller Girls are proud to be entering its own team in the 13th Annual Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure, held in downtown St. Louis on Saturday, June 11.
Over 71,000 participants competed at last year’s event, which raised over $3.4 million in net proceeds locally.
The St. Louis affiliate – one of more than 125 affiliates worldwide – works to better the lives of those facing breast cancer in the local community. The Susan G. Komen for the Cure is considered part of the world’s largest and most progressive grassroots network fighting breast cancer.
According to its official website, nearly seventy-five percent of net proceeds raised locally stay in the St. Louis area to fund screening, treatment, education and support programs.
A minimum of twenty-five percent of money raised goes to the national Susan G. Komen for the Cure Grants program.
Last year, ARRG raised $1,595 at Race for the Cure. This year the goal is $2,000.
To visit the ARRG team page and to make a donation, CLICK RIGHT HERE!
JUNE’S ARRG ALL-STAR BOUT A HOT ITEM!
With playoff positioning in the active WFTDA North Central region up for grabs, the Saturday, June 11 match-up against #7 North Star is becoming a bout that is being watched closely within the national derby scene.
After dismantling #9 Chicago Outfit two weeks ago, tenth-ranked ARRG can shake up the current region rankings with a win over the Supernovas at Midwest Sport Hockey in Ballwin.
North Star was pummeled by the Outfit earlier this year and seems to be a squad that needs to “win it” or potentially not be “in it” – meaning the upcoming North Central regional tournament later Fall in Indianapolis.
The holds true as well for ARRG, winner of five straight bouts. After breaking into the top ten one month ago, a victory at home June 11 can potentially propel the team up the rankings.
Both squads have everything to gain – and conversely, everything to lose – in this bout.
The undercard of this bout also brings a lot of intrigue.
The STLGatekeepers, St. Louis’ mens flat-track franchise – face the Twin City Terrors of Minneapolis/St. Paul.
The Gatekeepers (4-0) picked up a historical win over the New York Shock Exchange – a team that had never lost in its four-year existence – two weeks ago.
They’ll face a TC Terrors squad that is currently 7-1 and looking to exact revenge on the ‘Keepers – who handed them a 15-point loss in 2010.
Both look to jockey for position for the inaugural Mens Roller Derby Association national tournament in October. The MRDA currently sports 11 teams. Only six will be invited to the tourney.
Needless to say, this is going to be a must-win bout for both squads.
Tickets for the doubleheader are on sale now at Brown Paper tickets. Save $3 per ticket online by going to this link RIGHT HERE!
ARRG TO PARTICIPATE IN GATEKEEPERS JUNE EVENT!
The first local intraleague season for the STLGatekeepers – ARRG’s brothers in derby – has been extremely successful.
Those in attendance have been entertained by the mens action, but there have also been some entertaining opening bouts.
ARRG skaters have participated in exhibition bouts prior to the main event – albeit under different identities in teams that are creatively assembled.
At a Gatekeepers’ bout in May, there was the epic battle between “The Hoosiers” and “The Hipsters.” June featured “Mom Jeans vs. Cat Ladies.”
The exhibition bout at the Saturday, June 18 Gatekeepers event at Midwest Sport Hockey has two teams of ARRG skaters that will have a true split of fans – “Kittens vs. Cougars.”
For those who might wonder what the dividing line of age would be to determine who would be on whose roster, let’s just say as of right now the age would be somewhere between….um well…that’s for you to find out on your own.
Nevertheless, it will be interesting to see who gets “declawed” in the flat-track battle.
ARRG ENTERS GELATIN-FILLED SQUARED CIRCLE!
ARRG Nation has participated in the trivia nights. They’ve had their pictures taken with skaters to raise funds.
This fundraiser literally takes the cake….or in this case, jello.
ARRG will host its first-ever “sports entertainment-style jello wrastlin’ event” on Friday, June 24 at FUBAR (3108 Locust, Downtown St. Louis).
OKAY, BEFORE ANYONE GETS A PRECONCEIVED NOTION, LET’S PUT A FEW RUMORS TO REST RIGHT NOW!
Although it says “jello wrastlin’” on the flyer, DO NOT expect the evening to be filled with skimpy lingerie and suggestive themes that one would come to find at a gentlemen’s club on the East Side.
I know what some of the men are thinking…”darn.”
I know what some of the women are thinking as well…”darn.”
This event is not designed to embarrass individuals and the league. It is not designed to denigrate. It is not designed to perpetuate activity that’s more in step with “hideouts” near a certain South St. Louis casino.
If it were, you can bet the Mizzus wouldn’t let the Poobah anywhere near FUBAR.
This event is not about T & A…it’s more in the style of WWE.
The action will feature outrageous characters such as luchadores, superheroes, science fiction parodies, villains – and perhaps with luck – a children’s cartoon character or two. Expect over-the-top whackiness, plenty of chicanery, and most importantly, a good-natured night of fun.
I would say it’ll good clean fun, but as the matches are taking place inside a jello pit, I can’t guarantee that.
There’s $2 PBRs and door prizes will be up for grabs. Music will be performed by Rowdie of MIXTAPE.
And officiating the bouts will be St. Louis’ hilariously funny and funky punkrockers The F*** Off and Dies, featuring Story of the Year frontman Dan Marsala (yes, THAT Story of the Year!)
Doors open at 7pm. Belltime is at 8 pm. Cleanup immediately follows. Tickets are $10 each, which does not include free dessert.
The event supports the ARRG travel teams for the remainder of 2011. And let’s face it, travel ain’t cheap these days.
Support ARRG in this good-humored night of grapplin’. After all…there’s always room for jello!
NEXT WEEK IN THE ARRG NEWSCENTER: The ARRG All-Stars prepare for #7 North Star. This one’s a big one! We’ll preview the June 11 bout.
When not writing columns that simultaneously mention breast cancer awareness and jello rasslin’, the Grand Poobah and Hells LaBelle are bout announcers for the Arch Rival Roller Girls. Check back in this section on Mondays for the latest in ARRG news and information.